28: expell for the gain
A week of emotional eating (and emotional expulsions) has made the scale ::gasp:: climb climb climb.
Yes, I'll admit it: I'm back up to 109lbs after recently dancing around 105. However, that was my post-workout, pre-two bowel movements weight, but I'll take it. Anything is better than the crazy 110.whatever I saw last night that no doubt helped trigger my purge. I am going to do my damndest to stay off the scale till Friday; I'm hoping to at least be back in under 108 by then. All this purging has seriously fucked with my digestion; I can tell by the way my poo looks (TMI I know but as a vegan who poops a lot, I notice these things!) and now it seems I may be getting it FINALLY back under control. The fact that it no longer looks like I'm trying to shoplift a partially deflated beachball is a huge, huge help in my feelings today. As much as I hate allowing it to happen, the mirror all to often dictates my mood these days.
Also true: I've been thinking about giving myself the birthday present of my weight from high school. Funny how things like that work out. Honestly, I've never been super into "goal weights" (maybe because I can never hit them by the time I'd like to?) but somehow this just seems right. Back on track, eyes on the prize, all the good cliches, ready to rock.
Alright, enough about how unhappy I am with my perfectly acceptable weight. On to the plans.
This morning whilst working out, I made some good assessments on why I fell into this cycle and how to stop it, thus causing me to try to plan the rest of my week.
Things that triggered my recent downfall:
- lack of safe foods at home and in the office
- getting bored with my routine, both food and fitness (nope, didn't mix it up like I tell everyone else to, clearly, MY stupid)
- discouragement via recurring injury (should have changed exercises instead of getting frustrated)
- emotional upheaval, of course
What to change moving forward:
- back to daily AM smoothies (yay, my bf picked up some rice bran I can put in smoothies for fiber)
- back to Tofurky for protein, pick up some chik'n patties too (NOTE TO SELF: go to Whole Paycheck Foods after work)
- mix up fitness, especially if I can get him to continue sleeping in the bedroom (then I can get up early and work out in the living room; when he's sick, he usually heads for the couch because he doesn't want to bug me)
Things I need to start utilizing at home:
- yoga DVDs (two different ones)
- ballet workout DVD
- Iron Gym (pull-ups, push-ups, dips)
- weights (they're little hand/ball weights, two different weights, both light enough for me but providing enough resistance to do something)
TONIGHT:
- stretching
- more abs
- push-ups/dips?
- leftover Thai food for dinner
WED:
- AM: yoga DVD
- smoothie at work
- PM: stretching and abs
- might be team lunch, TBD, have something light ready!
- soup or salad, something light for dinner
THURS:
- AM: elliptical + lower body lifting
- smoothie
- PM: stretching and abs
- skip lunch? we'll see
- soup or salad, light dinner
FRI:
- AM: ballet DVD at home
- AM: upper body lifting at work
- smoothie
- light lunch for big dinner/Friday boozing
SAT:
- at least 30min of yoga or ballet DVD, plus stretching
SUN:
- off, but must at least stretch
And of course, a fresh round from losertown for kicks.
DayWeightCalories UsedYour Calorie Deficit 06/23/2009108.021870.25570.25 06/30/2009106.881862.27562.27 07/07/2009105.761854.4554.4 07/14/2009104.661846.65546.65 07/21/2009103.581839539 07/28/2009102.51831.46531.46 08/04/2009101.451824.02524.02 08/11/2009100.411816.69516.69 08/18/200999.381809.46509.46 08/25/200998.371802.33502.33 09/01/200997.371795.3495.3 09/08/200996.381788.37488.37 09/15/200995.411781.54481.54 09/22/200994.451774.8474.8
Yes, I'll admit it: I'm back up to 109lbs after recently dancing around 105. However, that was my post-workout, pre-two bowel movements weight, but I'll take it. Anything is better than the crazy 110.whatever I saw last night that no doubt helped trigger my purge. I am going to do my damndest to stay off the scale till Friday; I'm hoping to at least be back in under 108 by then. All this purging has seriously fucked with my digestion; I can tell by the way my poo looks (TMI I know but as a vegan who poops a lot, I notice these things!) and now it seems I may be getting it FINALLY back under control. The fact that it no longer looks like I'm trying to shoplift a partially deflated beachball is a huge, huge help in my feelings today. As much as I hate allowing it to happen, the mirror all to often dictates my mood these days.
Also true: I've been thinking about giving myself the birthday present of my weight from high school. Funny how things like that work out. Honestly, I've never been super into "goal weights" (maybe because I can never hit them by the time I'd like to?) but somehow this just seems right. Back on track, eyes on the prize, all the good cliches, ready to rock.
Alright, enough about how unhappy I am with my perfectly acceptable weight. On to the plans.
This morning whilst working out, I made some good assessments on why I fell into this cycle and how to stop it, thus causing me to try to plan the rest of my week.
Things that triggered my recent downfall:
- lack of safe foods at home and in the office
- getting bored with my routine, both food and fitness (nope, didn't mix it up like I tell everyone else to, clearly, MY stupid)
- discouragement via recurring injury (should have changed exercises instead of getting frustrated)
- emotional upheaval, of course
What to change moving forward:
- back to daily AM smoothies (yay, my bf picked up some rice bran I can put in smoothies for fiber)
- back to Tofurky for protein, pick up some chik'n patties too (NOTE TO SELF: go to Whole Paycheck Foods after work)
- mix up fitness, especially if I can get him to continue sleeping in the bedroom (then I can get up early and work out in the living room; when he's sick, he usually heads for the couch because he doesn't want to bug me)
Things I need to start utilizing at home:
- yoga DVDs (two different ones)
- ballet workout DVD
- Iron Gym (pull-ups, push-ups, dips)
- weights (they're little hand/ball weights, two different weights, both light enough for me but providing enough resistance to do something)
TONIGHT:
- stretching
- more abs
- push-ups/dips?
- leftover Thai food for dinner
WED:
- AM: yoga DVD
- smoothie at work
- PM: stretching and abs
- might be team lunch, TBD, have something light ready!
- soup or salad, something light for dinner
THURS:
- AM: elliptical + lower body lifting
- smoothie
- PM: stretching and abs
- skip lunch? we'll see
- soup or salad, light dinner
FRI:
- AM: ballet DVD at home
- AM: upper body lifting at work
- smoothie
- light lunch for big dinner/Friday boozing
SAT:
- at least 30min of yoga or ballet DVD, plus stretching
SUN:
- off, but must at least stretch
And of course, a fresh round from losertown for kicks.
DayWeightCalories UsedYour Calorie Deficit 06/23/2009108.021870.25570.25 06/30/2009106.881862.27562.27 07/07/2009105.761854.4554.4 07/14/2009104.661846.65546.65 07/21/2009103.581839539 07/28/2009102.51831.46531.46 08/04/2009101.451824.02524.02 08/11/2009100.411816.69516.69 08/18/200999.381809.46509.46 08/25/200998.371802.33502.33 09/01/200997.371795.3495.3 09/08/200996.381788.37488.37 09/15/200995.411781.54481.54 09/22/200994.451774.8474.8