Splash splash gurgle siiiiigh.

"Bloooooooooooooooop!"

{Moooooooooom! I swam everywhere looking for you and a shark almost ate me and I peed on an anemone because he was a jerkface mooooooooooom hi mom where's dad hiiiiiiii!}

"......Bloop?"

{...Untranslatable.}

Don't ask why Tino was willing to get Kenzi 150 pounds of shrimp. It was either bribery, blackmail, or sheer bludgeoning personality. Whyever he did it, he did it without asking questions ( Read more... )

Announcer: Tonight on TLC's Faking It, can this lifelong undersea dweller--

Interrupting Squid: Bloop, bloopidy bloop...

Announcer: Sorry. Can this lifelong undersea, high school swimming pool and duck pond dweller convince an entire bar and dance club full of people that she's really a hot, leather-clad bartender with a great rack and the ( Read more... )

"Splish, splash, I was takin' a baaaa-ath--" sang the 5,000th krill, because that was the only effing song they knew, and Sunshine rolled her giant yellow eye, then devoured it and 4,999 of its brethren, following that up with a sad little belch. (Well, little for a giant squid, which meant that the bubbly tsunami briefly covered the empty causeway ( Read more... )