The Church, Saturday Afternoon

[glacial_witch]

Karla walked, yes walked, into the Church. God, it felt so GOOD to be free from those annoying and painful braces, free to finally move around with grace and freedom. It was a miracle, an honest and true miracle, that had freed her from the dreaded injuries that had made her unable to walk unaided

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[bigdamndestiny]

"Karla!" Merlin boomed in a perfectly dramatic fashion from the pulpit. It was a cruel mockery of a church with him and his booke of darke artes up there as the priest. "Are you prepared?"

[glacial_witch]

"I am," Karla announced, tossing her bright golden locks over her shoulder to fall cascading down her back. "Instruct me so that I may learn how to serve you best."

She prowled closer to him, loving the way her muscles moved so freely. "Anything I can do to thank you for this gift...well, it isn't enough. Tell me what I must do!" She laughed throatily and posed.

[bigdamndestiny]

They truly were beautiful. It was a shame that his heart was set upon dark hair and a poorly concealed Irish accent.

"We must destroy the Skywalkers. Now that I have cured you of your debilitating illness that I'm not entirely sure actually exists, you will use your feminine wiles to bring them down. Starting with Ben Skywalker."

Yes, the boy needed to be killed with beauty.

"It's fitting, don't you think?"

[glacial_witch]

Karla let out a girlish squeal of delight. And then clapped her hands. "Master, I adore the way you think. In fact, I've already taken the first few...steps...towards that goal already."

Truly, that pun was brilliant.

Karla executed a few completely unnecessary backbends. "Whatever it is you want."

[bitch_prince]

The first thing that occurred to Arthur when he finally made it to the pew - after that unfortunate detour by JGoBs, which had looked disturbingly churchlike and he wasn't even going to think about it - was not in fact 'oh look, I've found my errant idiot', but rather 'oh god, I've just seen more of her than I ever wanted to. Ever'.

Which would explain why he stopped halfway in and said, in a tone far more concerned than he'd ever admit, "Karla. You seem to have lost something. Do you need a shirt?"

Beat. Without looking at him. Because seriously. Brain bleach.

"Merlin, get her a shirt."

[bigdamndestiny]

"Do I know you?" Merlin asked with a cruel sneer. "Who sent you? Was it that fool Anakin? I should have known he'd be so stupid to send a boy to kill me!"

[glacial_witch]

"A shirt? Please honey, like I'd have to hide these," Karla sniffed, outlining her chest with slow hands.

She glanced up at Merlin and shook her hair again. "I can get rid of him if you want, Master. Just say the word and it's done."

[bitch_prince]

"Yes," Arthur snapped back at her, "Please hide them. Hide them immediately." He shot Merlin a look that simply exuded sheer bloody offense on all levels. "A boy, Merlin?" he shot back. "A boy? I can kill a deer from a hundred paces. You can barely tie your own shoelaces without sinking through your dainty bloody legs."

This was not a time to get distracted, Arthur.

[joan_notjane]

[The part of Joan is now being played by Deborah Ann Woll]

Joan entered the church, oblivious to any other drama that might be going on, and fell to her knees in front of the altar.

"God, please help me," she begged. "My sister is planning evil and I don't know how to stop her. But I must stop her."

[bigdamndestiny]

Merlin laughed cruelly at her, not about to allow this farce continue. "God? There is no God, girl!"

He knew. He was a Bass-Stark. hey killed god for funsies.

[joan_notjane]

Joan immediately burst into tears. She was the sensitive one, after all.

"Then who comes to my room at night and tells me what to do?"

[bigdamndestiny]

"Satan." Because all magic was evil. Especially his.

[bitten_notshy]

Father Jonathan came out from the back room where he'd been putting on his vestements and buffing his hair to a perfect gold. He was a much prettier priest than that faker, Father Ned; he had no idea why Ned was popular.

He smiled vaguely to the girl. "May I help you, my child," he said, then noticed the young men. "... or my children. The Lord can help you all."

[bigdamndestiny]

...he was much prettier, yes. But no! Merlin's heart belonged to Morgana. Sweet, beautiful Morgana...

"The Lord has no love for our kind, Father."

[bitten_notshy]

Father Jonathan smiled beatifically. "The Lord loves us all, in His own way."

[bigdamndestiny]

"He has turned his back on me long ago. When he took my brother from me. And--" Be strong, Merlin. Be strong. "The woman I loved."

[trigons_child]

Rachel Roth was a sweet and pious girl...at least during the daylight hours. At night, she led a secret life of decadence and sin as the masked dominatrix, Mistress Raven. It was the only way she could pay to put herself through school here and then afford college, for she had no family to help her. And so she struggled on her own, doing what she had to to make the money. But no one could ever find out, or she'd be thrown out of school, and she'd never be accepted into Harvard or Yale.

She came now to the church to confess her sins, because in mere hours, she would be sinning again. She knelt before the altar, head bowed in prayer.

[bigdamndestiny]

"Mistress Raven," Merlin said, coming up beside her. Oh, she was so close to his beloved Morgana. He could hardly be faulted for his indulging.

[trigons_child]

"Do not call me that in public!" she said sharply, looking around to make sure no one had heard. There were few who knew her secret, but Merlin was one of them -- and a frequent customer.

[bigdamndestiny]

"Or you'll punish me... mistress?"

He was a bad, bad boy.