Learnin' with Mr. Peanutbutter, Thursday, period 1
Arriving at the classroom, the students would find a sign on the door instructing them to meet out on the "quad". Was there a quad at Fandom? Probably not, to be honest. But leaving the school building, they'd eventually find Mr. Peanutbutter on a broad expanse of grass between the classrooms and the dorms. He had forgone his hipster glasses and tweed jacket, instead wearing just his usual track pants and tshirt combination.
He had a whistle hanging around his neck, though.
Foreboding.
"Welcome back!" he greeted expansively, arms spread. "I hope you all had a wonderful and relaxing fall break, full of only the most entertaining and cinematic of adventures." Sure. That's what breaks were about. "Today I thought it was time to tackle one of the most important, yet divisive of school subjects: physical education." He clasped his hands behind his back and began to pace in front of the gathered students, looking thoughtful. "It was Baron Pierre de Coubertin who first emphasized the importance of sport in modern education. He thought it so important, in fact, that he even founded the modern Olympic games. They were quite a fiasco for several years, but that didn't undermine his point: learning from books was all well and good, but nothing beat some time applying that learning out in the field. The ball field!"
Baron Pierre de Coubertin was a subject of a whole episode of Hollywoo Stars and Celebrities What Do They Know Do They Know Things Let's Find Out. In case anyone was wondering why Mr. Peanutbutter suddenly seemed to know something.
"Today we're going to play one of the great classics of scholastic sporting." Mr. Peanutbutter picked up a red rubber ball. "Dodgeball! Now, I know, I know." He held up a hand. "This is the sort of game that either you love, or you hate. But then, so is math and reading, and I already covered both of those subjects, so dodgeball gets a week, too." Because you could totally cover all of math and reading in a week. "We're not going to play any old ordinary version of dodgeball though, no, not when we only just learned about Baron Pierre de Coubertin! We're going to play Greek dodgeball."
That's right, that wiki entry is titled "Prisonball". Buckle up, kids.
"The main difference between traditional dodgeball and Greek dodgeball is that you are never truly out. When you get hit by a ball, or someone catches a ball that you threw, you go to the other team's 'prison' on the borders of their territory. From there, if you catch a stray ball, you can hit one of your opponents with it and get back 'in'." That's right, so a winning team could potentially find themselves attacked on four fronts. Best game ever. "Why, I've seen a team come back from a near devastating loss to win the whole game by getting balls to the prisoners in a timely manner. There's just no telling what might happen!"
And just no escaping the possibility of being pelted in the head by a large red rubber ball.
Fun!
"Now I know team picking can be a little bit tough for the less popular students, so never fear: I've assigned you to teams based on who arrived at class first. It's the only fair way to do it." He quickly pointed out the teams, then directed them to either side of the game field, marked out by little orange cones to indicate both sides' "in" zones, and their prisons. Then he blew his whistle as loud as he could. "Let's get physicaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaal!"
He had a whistle hanging around his neck, though.
Foreboding.
"Welcome back!" he greeted expansively, arms spread. "I hope you all had a wonderful and relaxing fall break, full of only the most entertaining and cinematic of adventures." Sure. That's what breaks were about. "Today I thought it was time to tackle one of the most important, yet divisive of school subjects: physical education." He clasped his hands behind his back and began to pace in front of the gathered students, looking thoughtful. "It was Baron Pierre de Coubertin who first emphasized the importance of sport in modern education. He thought it so important, in fact, that he even founded the modern Olympic games. They were quite a fiasco for several years, but that didn't undermine his point: learning from books was all well and good, but nothing beat some time applying that learning out in the field. The ball field!"
Baron Pierre de Coubertin was a subject of a whole episode of Hollywoo Stars and Celebrities What Do They Know Do They Know Things Let's Find Out. In case anyone was wondering why Mr. Peanutbutter suddenly seemed to know something.
"Today we're going to play one of the great classics of scholastic sporting." Mr. Peanutbutter picked up a red rubber ball. "Dodgeball! Now, I know, I know." He held up a hand. "This is the sort of game that either you love, or you hate. But then, so is math and reading, and I already covered both of those subjects, so dodgeball gets a week, too." Because you could totally cover all of math and reading in a week. "We're not going to play any old ordinary version of dodgeball though, no, not when we only just learned about Baron Pierre de Coubertin! We're going to play Greek dodgeball."
That's right, that wiki entry is titled "Prisonball". Buckle up, kids.
"The main difference between traditional dodgeball and Greek dodgeball is that you are never truly out. When you get hit by a ball, or someone catches a ball that you threw, you go to the other team's 'prison' on the borders of their territory. From there, if you catch a stray ball, you can hit one of your opponents with it and get back 'in'." That's right, so a winning team could potentially find themselves attacked on four fronts. Best game ever. "Why, I've seen a team come back from a near devastating loss to win the whole game by getting balls to the prisoners in a timely manner. There's just no telling what might happen!"
And just no escaping the possibility of being pelted in the head by a large red rubber ball.
Fun!
"Now I know team picking can be a little bit tough for the less popular students, so never fear: I've assigned you to teams based on who arrived at class first. It's the only fair way to do it." He quickly pointed out the teams, then directed them to either side of the game field, marked out by little orange cones to indicate both sides' "in" zones, and their prisons. Then he blew his whistle as loud as he could. "Let's get physicaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaal!"