Fandom Radio, Friday, March 9, 2007
"This is Herman the talking duck," Hades said, not making any attempts to disguise his voice. "On WTFH radio, now with 92% more rain.
Class: Some of Us Have It, Some of You Don't
US Government discussed the President's furniture, which is probably wet by now, and talked about which piece of furniture they'd want to be.
Music is Love's theme was marital arts and hats. Wait. Martial arts or marital arts? All things marital are more combat than art. The Mountie and the Ninja were the judges. Everyone sang and Alec stripped. No one was surprised.
Seely...Sealant? Your new name is Glue. Glue taught Villains and Villainy because the teacher was sick. Yeah right. She was too lazy to get out of bed. Theme of the day was my personal favorite, the Femme Fatale. In this case, Bitterwoman. Melakalaka Balance Board of Trust wanted to know if she got an A for using girlkissy as her weapon of choice. Knowing Glue, probably.
Rose (by any other name would smell as sweet) taught Adventuring Survival Tactics because The Doctor wasn't in. Probably went for a swim. If you see a guy with big ears and water wings floaties, tell him he's a slacker. International mishaps were the talk of the day. Namely, how to avoid avoiding them. And John Connor talked about the weather.
Wow. Really. Because that's not a big topic of the day or anything.
The school assembly was a Battle of the Sexes. Sam, Billy and Peter of the Bangs represented the boys. Considering these boys are full of I Can't Believe It's Not Testosterone instead of the real thing, I can safely assumed that the boys lost. Oh, and the enemy team consisted of Molly, Naomi and Annie who probably had more collective gonads than the boys' team.
Billy and Naomi had a battle of wits, Sam and Molly had a battle of pudding, Peter of the Bangs and Annie busted a move (and you'd better be planning on fixing it), Sam and Naomi wound up in giant gerbil wheels. Run, mortals, run! Peter of the Bangs and Molly showed that they passed the first grade, Billy and Annie decorated Alanna and that cat of hers and the audience cheered. It doesn't say who won, but it's not hard to guess.
Self-Defense Club met and is probably going to become the synchonized swimming club before too long.
The easiest mocking target since Helen of Tory opened the library and Bridge stopped in to get over himself. Now all we need is River in here and we've got a whole bad pun saying thing going on.
Office hours were popular, but the people holding them weren't. Poindexter, Orphy, Dark and Brooding, the Friz, Space Cadet, Brace Face and By Any Other Name joined in. It's like a block party, without food or fun.
Dorms: Come Sail Away, Come Sail Away, Come Sail Away With Me
Aeryn stayed out of the rain and worked out in the gym. People wisely left her alone.
Valentine has a penis. Tortoise doesn't care, Nova hid, Jaye congratulated him on the discovery. I wonder if it has a mask too. John Connor joined in on the day of jubilee.
The Roof was rained on, like every other piece of this godsforsaken rock, and Sokka looked for Katara. Tori looked for Sokka. No one cares. Blonde Sam played in the rain and didn't melt, Billy joined her and didn't short circuit, Jack joined both of them but the rain didn't sizzle on His Hotness like he'd have people believe and Billy asked about Jack's womanhood. Classy.
Jack got a phone call and called Parker. What is this? Phone tag? Stark is back to normal and is as elated as an emo kid can be, Isabel is back and was taken back to her room, Cedric came to check on her. Blair and Miley got phone calls to leave town (coincidence? I think not. Put that in your relationship news). Marie told Jamie about a power switch. Yes, it's on the wall. I think this sets a record for new levels of boring news. Jude and Rikku get down and dirty, Bel-who's-not-dead-now-really decides to go see Angel and Lana and Phoebe do girl things.
Nadia gets flowers for her birthday. Pippi surprised her with presents. It's her birthday. How is that a surprise? Birthdays only exist for presents. Plus, typically, celebrations. In the fifth floor common room. Walter was there to talk about the weather, so was Al and Pippi and John Connor and Setsuna. Then Nadia felt pain. I feel that way on birthdays too.
Willow wrote fan fiction and you should all ask to see it, Jack went to River for a booty call, Annie slept and Sokka and Evie talked about technology that's not going to help you now. Marie and Peter of the Bangs talk about a power switch. No. Really. Electricity is thrilling. Jamie joined in on the electrical fun, Jack went to hug Isabel and Alec, Dean and Glue woke up together. In bed. Write fan fiction about THAT.
Town: Darling It's Better, Down Where It's Wetter. Except Not, Because It Blows
The clinic was full of comas and visitors and doctors. Also, water is wet.
Caritas got into the spirit with sandbags. Sandbags and cocktails. It's the latest fad. Barbossa is offering boat rides for the right price. Pirate. Turtle & Canary had a mermaid employee, the causeway is still there because Jack and Parker went to get Isabel, the post office was open, but moist. Luke's was soupy and Silent Bob and Mazikeen had a quiet dinner. Hah. I kill me.
Rain couldn't stop the Kwik Stop from having loiterers on the roof, Cafe Fina was prejudiced against merfolks and Leo of the Photo Shop was high.
The schmoopy duo had dinner, Azzy taught Blair to bake, Abby of the Crypt left town (smart move), the pirate wannabe got a phone call, the big phone booth went underwater and Clark is gone for good. Anyone want to run a hotel?
The water is starting to rise.
Aaaand Poseidon showed up to lay claim to Fandom after some groundhog minion killed some of his fish. That's my cue to vamoose. Goodbye Fandom, this is Herman the talking rubber duck signing off. Enjoy being part of Poseidon's dominion and don't forget half price off SCUBA gear."
Hades then disappeared, leaving Herman on the broadcast desk.
Class: Some of Us Have It, Some of You Don't
US Government discussed the President's furniture, which is probably wet by now, and talked about which piece of furniture they'd want to be.
Music is Love's theme was marital arts and hats. Wait. Martial arts or marital arts? All things marital are more combat than art. The Mountie and the Ninja were the judges. Everyone sang and Alec stripped. No one was surprised.
Seely...Sealant? Your new name is Glue. Glue taught Villains and Villainy because the teacher was sick. Yeah right. She was too lazy to get out of bed. Theme of the day was my personal favorite, the Femme Fatale. In this case, Bitterwoman. Melakalaka Balance Board of Trust wanted to know if she got an A for using girlkissy as her weapon of choice. Knowing Glue, probably.
Rose (by any other name would smell as sweet) taught Adventuring Survival Tactics because The Doctor wasn't in. Probably went for a swim. If you see a guy with big ears and water wings floaties, tell him he's a slacker. International mishaps were the talk of the day. Namely, how to avoid avoiding them. And John Connor talked about the weather.
Wow. Really. Because that's not a big topic of the day or anything.
The school assembly was a Battle of the Sexes. Sam, Billy and Peter of the Bangs represented the boys. Considering these boys are full of I Can't Believe It's Not Testosterone instead of the real thing, I can safely assumed that the boys lost. Oh, and the enemy team consisted of Molly, Naomi and Annie who probably had more collective gonads than the boys' team.
Billy and Naomi had a battle of wits, Sam and Molly had a battle of pudding, Peter of the Bangs and Annie busted a move (and you'd better be planning on fixing it), Sam and Naomi wound up in giant gerbil wheels. Run, mortals, run! Peter of the Bangs and Molly showed that they passed the first grade, Billy and Annie decorated Alanna and that cat of hers and the audience cheered. It doesn't say who won, but it's not hard to guess.
Self-Defense Club met and is probably going to become the synchonized swimming club before too long.
The easiest mocking target since Helen of Tory opened the library and Bridge stopped in to get over himself. Now all we need is River in here and we've got a whole bad pun saying thing going on.
Office hours were popular, but the people holding them weren't. Poindexter, Orphy, Dark and Brooding, the Friz, Space Cadet, Brace Face and By Any Other Name joined in. It's like a block party, without food or fun.
Dorms: Come Sail Away, Come Sail Away, Come Sail Away With Me
Aeryn stayed out of the rain and worked out in the gym. People wisely left her alone.
Valentine has a penis. Tortoise doesn't care, Nova hid, Jaye congratulated him on the discovery. I wonder if it has a mask too. John Connor joined in on the day of jubilee.
The Roof was rained on, like every other piece of this godsforsaken rock, and Sokka looked for Katara. Tori looked for Sokka. No one cares. Blonde Sam played in the rain and didn't melt, Billy joined her and didn't short circuit, Jack joined both of them but the rain didn't sizzle on His Hotness like he'd have people believe and Billy asked about Jack's womanhood. Classy.
Jack got a phone call and called Parker. What is this? Phone tag? Stark is back to normal and is as elated as an emo kid can be, Isabel is back and was taken back to her room, Cedric came to check on her. Blair and Miley got phone calls to leave town (coincidence? I think not. Put that in your relationship news). Marie told Jamie about a power switch. Yes, it's on the wall. I think this sets a record for new levels of boring news. Jude and Rikku get down and dirty, Bel-who's-not-dead-now-really decides to go see Angel and Lana and Phoebe do girl things.
Nadia gets flowers for her birthday. Pippi surprised her with presents. It's her birthday. How is that a surprise? Birthdays only exist for presents. Plus, typically, celebrations. In the fifth floor common room. Walter was there to talk about the weather, so was Al and Pippi and John Connor and Setsuna. Then Nadia felt pain. I feel that way on birthdays too.
Willow wrote fan fiction and you should all ask to see it, Jack went to River for a booty call, Annie slept and Sokka and Evie talked about technology that's not going to help you now. Marie and Peter of the Bangs talk about a power switch. No. Really. Electricity is thrilling. Jamie joined in on the electrical fun, Jack went to hug Isabel and Alec, Dean and Glue woke up together. In bed. Write fan fiction about THAT.
Town: Darling It's Better, Down Where It's Wetter. Except Not, Because It Blows
The clinic was full of comas and visitors and doctors. Also, water is wet.
Caritas got into the spirit with sandbags. Sandbags and cocktails. It's the latest fad. Barbossa is offering boat rides for the right price. Pirate. Turtle & Canary had a mermaid employee, the causeway is still there because Jack and Parker went to get Isabel, the post office was open, but moist. Luke's was soupy and Silent Bob and Mazikeen had a quiet dinner. Hah. I kill me.
Rain couldn't stop the Kwik Stop from having loiterers on the roof, Cafe Fina was prejudiced against merfolks and Leo of the Photo Shop was high.
The schmoopy duo had dinner, Azzy taught Blair to bake, Abby of the Crypt left town (smart move), the pirate wannabe got a phone call, the big phone booth went underwater and Clark is gone for good. Anyone want to run a hotel?
The water is starting to rise.
Aaaand Poseidon showed up to lay claim to Fandom after some groundhog minion killed some of his fish. That's my cue to vamoose. Goodbye Fandom, this is Herman the talking rubber duck signing off. Enjoy being part of Poseidon's dominion and don't forget half price off SCUBA gear."
Hades then disappeared, leaving Herman on the broadcast desk.