(no subject)
wow. i havent written in this thing in like 4 months. but i really need to get something out.....
I DONT FUCKING UNDERSTAND PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GOD!!! everyone i care about seems to distance themselves more and more from me. and then when we work things out, no one makes an effort to become closer with me again. this shit is so fucked up!! fuck it. i dont even care anymore. i hate my father, my frends treat me like shit, i get tossed around and twisted the way people want, and no one ever considers how i feel. fuck this shit! i dont need it anymore! i cant wait to go to college next year on the east coast away from all the assholes out here that like to play with my head and my heart and twist me around as they so please. well im glad that you all have fun fucking with my feelings and emotions and all that shit. GOD I CANT STAND PEOPLE!!! AAAAAARGH!!! sometimes i just wish i knife dropped out of the sky and stabbed through my head. then the world would be happier cuz i wouldnt have to be in everyones way all the time. i just seem to be an obstacle that everyone has to get around, and all im doin is ruining everyones lives. but when u take me out of the picture, no one has anything to worry about. ive had a looooooot of time by myself to think about this shit. and everything has gotten 28934702983740 times worse. its so hard for me to do this by myself. people tell me there here for me, but who really is? who out of all my frends has actually been there for me when i need it most?! kika is prolly the only one who has been there. so fuck everyone else, cuz everyone else just fucks with my head. when im out on the east coast next year, u guys will be damn lucky if u hear from me. cuz i dont plan on keeping in touch with the people who were never there for me, who never made any attempts to strengthen our friendships, and i dont plan on talkin to the people who just never talked to me while i lived here! so if u want me to stay in touch with you, post a comment to this showing that u really do care. cuz this weekend i almost committed suicide. it took a lot for me to not do it. the only thing that kept me alive was that i have 8 months left till im moving out into another world known to us as the east coast. and once im there, i never have to look back. thats why im still here right now. more shit happened this weekend that i cant talk about. family related shit that i dont wanna get into. if u wanna know, i.m. me and ill tell you about it. but seriously. i feel like about 98% of my frends dont even care. so prove me wrong!
I DONT FUCKING UNDERSTAND PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GOD!!! everyone i care about seems to distance themselves more and more from me. and then when we work things out, no one makes an effort to become closer with me again. this shit is so fucked up!! fuck it. i dont even care anymore. i hate my father, my frends treat me like shit, i get tossed around and twisted the way people want, and no one ever considers how i feel. fuck this shit! i dont need it anymore! i cant wait to go to college next year on the east coast away from all the assholes out here that like to play with my head and my heart and twist me around as they so please. well im glad that you all have fun fucking with my feelings and emotions and all that shit. GOD I CANT STAND PEOPLE!!! AAAAAARGH!!! sometimes i just wish i knife dropped out of the sky and stabbed through my head. then the world would be happier cuz i wouldnt have to be in everyones way all the time. i just seem to be an obstacle that everyone has to get around, and all im doin is ruining everyones lives. but when u take me out of the picture, no one has anything to worry about. ive had a looooooot of time by myself to think about this shit. and everything has gotten 28934702983740 times worse. its so hard for me to do this by myself. people tell me there here for me, but who really is? who out of all my frends has actually been there for me when i need it most?! kika is prolly the only one who has been there. so fuck everyone else, cuz everyone else just fucks with my head. when im out on the east coast next year, u guys will be damn lucky if u hear from me. cuz i dont plan on keeping in touch with the people who were never there for me, who never made any attempts to strengthen our friendships, and i dont plan on talkin to the people who just never talked to me while i lived here! so if u want me to stay in touch with you, post a comment to this showing that u really do care. cuz this weekend i almost committed suicide. it took a lot for me to not do it. the only thing that kept me alive was that i have 8 months left till im moving out into another world known to us as the east coast. and once im there, i never have to look back. thats why im still here right now. more shit happened this weekend that i cant talk about. family related shit that i dont wanna get into. if u wanna know, i.m. me and ill tell you about it. but seriously. i feel like about 98% of my frends dont even care. so prove me wrong!