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[falllenshadows]

I realy hate this,  you know its like Iam ok right now,  a friend (ok well she is more than a friend) is here for another week, and well honestly I can actually smile around her, one of the only people I have ever founf that can make me smile, granted not all the time.  But Im so comfortable around her.    We are rather perfect for eachother,

Comments

[anonymous]

Your not crazy. I once thought i was crazy too. My family even thought i was crazy. Your just deep inside an internal mazed that is stuck at the bottom of a hole. But there is hope. However, no doctor or hospital or pill can give you the magic cure, they can only offer stilts to support your own work. You have to wake up one morning and say, i am willing to change, i am willing to step outside of my comfort zone and i am willing to feel worse in order to feel better. My personal experience, hospitals and psych wards suck. the professionals only made my problems worse and the people in there with me were just as unmotivated as i was. But then i went to a treatment center that specialized in the issues i was dealing with and it helped me greatly. I was surrounded by people who actually UNDERSTOOD me and supported me and accepted me and my problems. in that environment i was forced to work on myself and helped give me the jump start i needed. But even with that there were ups and downs, relapses and what nots, but overall if you want it bad enough you can improve your life to actually feel like one.

[falllenshadows]

Im workign on it thats the thing thats what I am totally concentrating on. People dont understand that it isnt just that for me. If it was up to me I wouldnt feel like thjis anymore. I try to get better, I do things that I liek to do. I work on what is bothering me instead of letting it get to me or cutting because of it. It isnt as simple as wanting it and working at it. I need help with it.
The thing is I have been having an up and down week adn the only reason I have gotten through it as well as I have is because a certain someone is here adn is a great person that I care a great deal for but she will be gone next week adn Im hoping that this good feeling will push through after she leaves but I do have my doubts.