Love, life, and everything
Love is a game that I hate to play. A lot of my friends are having issues in their relationships or are having problems just trying to get into one. The only exception to this that I can think of, is Dale and Desi. They are as happy as can be with each other
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I love having time off from work but I hate not being busy. When I'm busy, I'm not lonely, honestly speaking. I mean, I could call the people I hung out with already this week, but it feels too weird. They are busy, they have lives of their own. It sucks being alone. But don't feel bad for me... I'm surviving. I have goals that I am currently working towards, and the thing is, I've realized that I don't need superficial relationships to keep me happy. I know that God is there for me and the people that he brings into my life are blessings from Him, so I enjoy them while they are there. But when they are gone, it's ok, too, because then God will fill my needs when I'm feeling bad. I appreciate what God has given me, even if He's taken it away for a time.
You see, you may think I sound miserable or depressed or unhappy. But I tell you what, I never feel more fulfilled then when I can cry to my God. He's the only one who helps me feel better. I can talk all I want about my problems or my feelings to another person, but the only one who can relate 100% perfectly is God.
Noone has ever experienced such a degree of loneliness and Jesus did when He died for us. His people left him, His Father left Him, and He even had to give up His own mother. I am only experiencing a tiny tiny fraction of what He felt the moment that everyone turned away from Him.
Thank you so much Lord for being there for me. Because even if everyone on the face of this earth ignores me and leaves me, You will still be there. So I am never truly alone.
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