Having a license does NOT make you a good driver
I don't have a driver's license. And, well... not trying to toot my own horn here, but I personally think I am a damn good driver. My grandmother however... is a total trainwreck. I don't even understand how she has not died in a collision yet. After driving with her yesterday for my dental appointment... I have reached the decision that she will never be driving my car anywhere, ever again. If she wants to total her own truck, fine. So be it. But the last thing I need is her demolishing mine because she can't keep her effing eyes on the road ahead of her. I figured it would have been better to let my grandma drive to and from the dental appointment, since my new dentist office is like... 15 - 20 minutes away. I wanted her to drive there so she would have an easier time remembering the way home. Well of course, she gets lost on the way there. Which I should have suspected. So a drive that should have taken around 15 - 20 minutes tops, took a little over an hour. Now, if she would have just stayed with the directions I gave her, we would have be super. But nooooooo. Don't listen to me. -_- I don't know what the hell I'm talking about.
The trip there was awful. Not only does she get us lost, but she almost killed us three separate times. We wind up in downtown Fenton, and we get to this intersection. The lights are out. So, you know how when the lights are out at an intersection, they make it a four way stop? They put up those big stop signs. Well, my grandma just decides... she doesn't care. And goes to breeze right on through when it's clearly not her turn. So we almost get crushed by this big giant truck, which would have demolished us in my tiny Ford Focus. -_- And I'm screaming, "Stop sign... stop sign! STOP SIGN!"
Oh. Also. Another fun fact about my grandma. She loves to stare. At people. At things. At inanimate objects. It doesn't matter. And wherever her eyes go, that's where the wheel goes. It's ridiculous. And I mean, ok, it really effing irritates me when she does it to people. And it's all the time. Like, you know, you pull up next to somebody at a light, you may take a quick glance? My grandma can't do that. She just sits there and stares you down. Every once in awhile, she will even point at them and talk shit [ even though they can't hear her ] but still. How fucking rude can you be?! For instance, we we're just leaving my house to head to the dentist office, right? And there is a Chanel 5 News van in the other lane next to us, on our left. My grandma just stares in at him the whole time, and then as we are passing him, she is still craning her neck back to stare. Why?! Why is it that fucking important?! I made a comment, "You stare a lot," and she just snapped back with, "Don't worry about what I do!" -_- Well, I will when your stupid antics are putting everyone in the car at risk cuz you can't keep your eyes on the fucking road. Thanks.
It was horribly ironic because half the way there, all she could do was talk shit about how Ashley is such a horrible driver. All the while, she is doing 50 on the fucking expressway. That is just retarded. Doesn't she ever feel stupid when people are flying by her, flipping her off and / or giving her dirty ass looks? I am always so embarrassed to be in a vehicle with her. But hey, I got off topic. Back to "my grandma almost killed us" stories. So after she almost kills us at that intersection, the next one we get to has road construction. So it's turned into a one lane really because the guys are in the very middle of the intersection with their jackhammers and shit. And two guys have signs, one says "Stop" and the other says "Slow", you know, directing traffic. Easy enough instruction to follow, don't you think?
Noooooope. My grandma decides... she's too good for such silly things. So she just goes right on through, almost killing us again, in one way fucking traffic, until this poor guy has to literally jump in front of my car and scream at us. "IT SAYS STOP! CAN'T YOU READ THE DAMN SIGN?! STOP!" So now... I'm utterly mortified. And my grandma is trying to play stupid. "Well I was just gonna pull up and ask him how to get to Holly...." HOW?! How did she plan to do this in one way traffic?!
Then of course the incident with the land island. Yup. Almost creamed that sucker good, almost destroyed my whole front end. I tried to bite my tongue because I figured, "there's no way she doesn't see that thing in front of her..." But of course, she just keeps right on going. So I finally scream at the last second, "WATCH OUT!" Thankfully she swerved at the last possible second, but then later claimed she "wasn't going to hit it." -_- Right.
Who knows how many more stunts she pulled with my car while I was inside getting my work done. And to add to the fun, it started snowing on the way home. Heavily. I really wish some people would just... listen to me. Because I really do know what I am talking about. When we we're pulling out, I said, "Just go straight, the expressway will be right up here and it will take us straight home." Does she listen to me? Noooooope. Instead, she takes a left [ and she wasn't even in the turn lane, which I told her she wasn't. But again. Didn't listen to me. ] and where to wind up? On Lake FUCKING Fenton, and then eventually out in Linden. Oh. Well. She finally decides to turn around and go back the way I said in the first place. Cuz you know. I just love wasting gas, don't you? Even though I filled that sucker up for $15, I still don't fancy think driving out to fucking Linden was really necessary. -_- Finally, we wind up back in Downtown Fenton, and right as she's going over these railroad tracks, the thinger goes off. You know, the railroad crossing. My grandma is on the tracks, ok? And the things start to come down. She decides to stop.
O__________________________________________O
So the seconds are ticking, and I am screaming, "Go... GO! GO! GO!" She's sitting on the train tracks, and she was just gonna let those things come crashing down on my car? How..... mentally challenged, do you have to be? No, really. That's a serious question. After that, I don't know how I fell asleep. Probably from all the Novocaine I had [ for the record, I had to have 6 shots. ] But I did. Probably for like a total of 4 minutes. I wake up to the loudest booming noise and the whole entire car is bouncing up and down. I sit up, petrified, just as we're coming back onto the road. -_- I look at my grandma who says, ".....I only hit the side of the curb, geez."
As I said before. Never. Again.
The trip there was awful. Not only does she get us lost, but she almost killed us three separate times. We wind up in downtown Fenton, and we get to this intersection. The lights are out. So, you know how when the lights are out at an intersection, they make it a four way stop? They put up those big stop signs. Well, my grandma just decides... she doesn't care. And goes to breeze right on through when it's clearly not her turn. So we almost get crushed by this big giant truck, which would have demolished us in my tiny Ford Focus. -_- And I'm screaming, "Stop sign... stop sign! STOP SIGN!"
Oh. Also. Another fun fact about my grandma. She loves to stare. At people. At things. At inanimate objects. It doesn't matter. And wherever her eyes go, that's where the wheel goes. It's ridiculous. And I mean, ok, it really effing irritates me when she does it to people. And it's all the time. Like, you know, you pull up next to somebody at a light, you may take a quick glance? My grandma can't do that. She just sits there and stares you down. Every once in awhile, she will even point at them and talk shit [ even though they can't hear her ] but still. How fucking rude can you be?! For instance, we we're just leaving my house to head to the dentist office, right? And there is a Chanel 5 News van in the other lane next to us, on our left. My grandma just stares in at him the whole time, and then as we are passing him, she is still craning her neck back to stare. Why?! Why is it that fucking important?! I made a comment, "You stare a lot," and she just snapped back with, "Don't worry about what I do!" -_- Well, I will when your stupid antics are putting everyone in the car at risk cuz you can't keep your eyes on the fucking road. Thanks.
It was horribly ironic because half the way there, all she could do was talk shit about how Ashley is such a horrible driver. All the while, she is doing 50 on the fucking expressway. That is just retarded. Doesn't she ever feel stupid when people are flying by her, flipping her off and / or giving her dirty ass looks? I am always so embarrassed to be in a vehicle with her. But hey, I got off topic. Back to "my grandma almost killed us" stories. So after she almost kills us at that intersection, the next one we get to has road construction. So it's turned into a one lane really because the guys are in the very middle of the intersection with their jackhammers and shit. And two guys have signs, one says "Stop" and the other says "Slow", you know, directing traffic. Easy enough instruction to follow, don't you think?
Noooooope. My grandma decides... she's too good for such silly things. So she just goes right on through, almost killing us again, in one way fucking traffic, until this poor guy has to literally jump in front of my car and scream at us. "IT SAYS STOP! CAN'T YOU READ THE DAMN SIGN?! STOP!" So now... I'm utterly mortified. And my grandma is trying to play stupid. "Well I was just gonna pull up and ask him how to get to Holly...." HOW?! How did she plan to do this in one way traffic?!
Then of course the incident with the land island. Yup. Almost creamed that sucker good, almost destroyed my whole front end. I tried to bite my tongue because I figured, "there's no way she doesn't see that thing in front of her..." But of course, she just keeps right on going. So I finally scream at the last second, "WATCH OUT!" Thankfully she swerved at the last possible second, but then later claimed she "wasn't going to hit it." -_- Right.
Who knows how many more stunts she pulled with my car while I was inside getting my work done. And to add to the fun, it started snowing on the way home. Heavily. I really wish some people would just... listen to me. Because I really do know what I am talking about. When we we're pulling out, I said, "Just go straight, the expressway will be right up here and it will take us straight home." Does she listen to me? Noooooope. Instead, she takes a left [ and she wasn't even in the turn lane, which I told her she wasn't. But again. Didn't listen to me. ] and where to wind up? On Lake FUCKING Fenton, and then eventually out in Linden. Oh. Well. She finally decides to turn around and go back the way I said in the first place. Cuz you know. I just love wasting gas, don't you? Even though I filled that sucker up for $15, I still don't fancy think driving out to fucking Linden was really necessary. -_- Finally, we wind up back in Downtown Fenton, and right as she's going over these railroad tracks, the thinger goes off. You know, the railroad crossing. My grandma is on the tracks, ok? And the things start to come down. She decides to stop.
O__________________________________________O
So the seconds are ticking, and I am screaming, "Go... GO! GO! GO!" She's sitting on the train tracks, and she was just gonna let those things come crashing down on my car? How..... mentally challenged, do you have to be? No, really. That's a serious question. After that, I don't know how I fell asleep. Probably from all the Novocaine I had [ for the record, I had to have 6 shots. ] But I did. Probably for like a total of 4 minutes. I wake up to the loudest booming noise and the whole entire car is bouncing up and down. I sit up, petrified, just as we're coming back onto the road. -_- I look at my grandma who says, ".....I only hit the side of the curb, geez."
As I said before. Never. Again.