something about the springtime.
Daily entry, right here. Today was more boring than yesterday was more boring than the day before...I don't want to go back to school, but Christ. I did manage to write my three-page psych case study in an hour and a half. This gave me a nice, accomplished feeling, but walking around after I emailed it to Rich I noted a lack of relief, which I attributed to the fact that I hadn't really felt any anxiety before writing it.
It's a basic purposelessness of my existence at the root of this ennui, I believe. It must be. I need a distraction from the fact that my life, nay, any life, is devoid of meaning. Are human beings meant to have purpose? Is this why I feel so empty? The idea that we've evolved by accident, which I accept, leaves no room for any purpose. But then - eh. Wouldn't I then be content to, you know, gather berries and sleep? I feel a need to immerse myself in human contact to forget this. However, however, I can't think of anything I could do with anyone else that would serve any more purpose than what I'm doing right now. Understand that I'm not *discontent* - not per se. It's a vaccuum.
It's a basic purposelessness of my existence at the root of this ennui, I believe. It must be. I need a distraction from the fact that my life, nay, any life, is devoid of meaning. Are human beings meant to have purpose? Is this why I feel so empty? The idea that we've evolved by accident, which I accept, leaves no room for any purpose. But then - eh. Wouldn't I then be content to, you know, gather berries and sleep? I feel a need to immerse myself in human contact to forget this. However, however, I can't think of anything I could do with anyone else that would serve any more purpose than what I'm doing right now. Understand that I'm not *discontent* - not per se. It's a vaccuum.