Takes Time
Starting a new life is never easy if you've been living a same old life for more than three years.
I'm very much aware of that before I'm moving in here. Aside of the traffic and dramas, I was living a pretty good life back then in capital city. I had a job, I knew many places, I was surrounded by my family and best friends. Before I went here, I have known that my life would completely change and there wouldn't be a chance to get my old life back. I knew that I have to leave everything behind.
I never stop praying to have a good environment and nice friends here. But for me, making friends always takes some times. I can never do it quickly--I'm friendly and polite and all, but I always build this wall around me. Moreover I'm still a little bit traumatic to befriend someone--thanks for the past experiences I've been through. Now I'm kinda like... 'Hey, nice to meet you, but please leave me alone, I'm good with myself'. I don't wanna be hurt anymore--I don't have any energy to deal with that while the school is getting started soon.
And I have this tight deadline to finish a novel for another writing competition. I have to finish it before school starts, before I get a job and become busy. Whatever it takes, I HAVE TO FINISH IT. This boarding house is a perfect place for me to write because I can literally write all day long in my room without any disturbance like I'm at home. But it costs me time to socialize with people. Fortunately, this is an all-female boarding house with more than thirty rooms so it has the tendency to 'mind-your-own-business'.
However, I'm mostly surrounded by Javanese people. You know them. They like to talk to other people, unlike the capital city habitants who tend to not care to other people.
I'm pretty much in-between: sometimes I really love to chit-chat, but mostly I prefer being on my own, spending time alone by reading, writing, and browsing the internet. I have my own world that nobody can't come in.
So yeah, I think I don't have to worry about this. It takes time to be close to someone, right? Why am I bothered with this anyway when I should write and finish that novel.
I'm very much aware of that before I'm moving in here. Aside of the traffic and dramas, I was living a pretty good life back then in capital city. I had a job, I knew many places, I was surrounded by my family and best friends. Before I went here, I have known that my life would completely change and there wouldn't be a chance to get my old life back. I knew that I have to leave everything behind.
I never stop praying to have a good environment and nice friends here. But for me, making friends always takes some times. I can never do it quickly--I'm friendly and polite and all, but I always build this wall around me. Moreover I'm still a little bit traumatic to befriend someone--thanks for the past experiences I've been through. Now I'm kinda like... 'Hey, nice to meet you, but please leave me alone, I'm good with myself'. I don't wanna be hurt anymore--I don't have any energy to deal with that while the school is getting started soon.
And I have this tight deadline to finish a novel for another writing competition. I have to finish it before school starts, before I get a job and become busy. Whatever it takes, I HAVE TO FINISH IT. This boarding house is a perfect place for me to write because I can literally write all day long in my room without any disturbance like I'm at home. But it costs me time to socialize with people. Fortunately, this is an all-female boarding house with more than thirty rooms so it has the tendency to 'mind-your-own-business'.
However, I'm mostly surrounded by Javanese people. You know them. They like to talk to other people, unlike the capital city habitants who tend to not care to other people.
I'm pretty much in-between: sometimes I really love to chit-chat, but mostly I prefer being on my own, spending time alone by reading, writing, and browsing the internet. I have my own world that nobody can't come in.
So yeah, I think I don't have to worry about this. It takes time to be close to someone, right? Why am I bothered with this anyway when I should write and finish that novel.