{buffyverse} the key
Title: The Key
Author: Aaronlisa
Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Pairing/Characters: Tara/Dawn
Rating: FR13
Disclaimer: Buffy the Vampire Slayer belongs to Joss Whedon and company.
Prompts: Written for the Tara round at femslash_minis for snowpuppies who wanted the pairing along with mention of Willow, cuddles and a loss without character bashing, super-duper-OOC and sweetness.
Notes: Set after the events of "The Gift."
Summary: Tara tries to convince Dawn that's she real.
Word Count: 1017
She can't help but think that it should feel wrong, very wrong, for her to be cuddling with Buffy's baby sister on the couch in the Summers family home. It's not as if she's meaning to have inappropriate thoughts, it's just that Dawn, in her grief, is curled up against her body in the exact same way that Willow normally curls up against her when they're tired from having far too much fun in the bedroom.
Tara sighs as she tries her best not to feel betrayed by Willow right now. She can understand why it's so important for her to stay behind with Dawn since Anya and Spike are off somewhere by themselves drowning their sorrows. After all, Willow, Giles and Xander have to take care of things since Buffy's dead. It shouldn't hurt that her girlfriend is more focused on Buffy instead of Tara. But it does hurt. After all, for quite some time (time that she's not quite determined herself) she's been nothing more than a zombie for an evil goddess. Tara's thoughts are racing in her head and it seems like Dawn's the only thing that's anchoring her to this world and Dawn's so fragile that Tara's certain the younger girl isn't really up to the job.
Buffy's gone. And Willow's off dealing with the aftermath while Tara is left behind to be nothing more than a glorified babysitter. Somehow no matter how she tries to rationalize things, there's no way Tara can make the sting of hurt go away. Right now, Tara wants nothing more than her girlfriend to be there on the couch, holding her, comforting her.
"She didn't have to jump, you know," Dawn quietly mutters.
For a moment, Tara's confuses as to who Dawn means.
"I could have jumped instead," Dawn says. "But she wouldn't let me. I know why though."
"Why?" Tara asks. She doesn't think she wants to know the reason why, or the reason that Dawn believes because she's fairly certain it won't be pleasant. But she's always been so polite that she can't not ask.
"Because she wanted to be with our mom," Dawn spits out. "She never thought I was a real girl, I was nothing but a fake sister."
"Dawnie, don't," Tara says.
"Don't what? Don't admit the truth? Don't be honest?" Dawn says. "It's why you're here and Willow, Giles and Xander aren't. I am not worthy of their time."
"That's not true," Tara replies without any conviction. (She wonders why she's been left behind too.) "They need to figure out things."
"She was the Slayer, it should have been me that jumped, now who's going to take care of me? Sunnydale and everything else? Faith's in jail. It's not as if the Council can pull out a Slayer whenever they want."
"That's what Willow and the others are trying to do, figure out a way to keep you safe."
"I'm not a little girl anymore," Dawn says.
She shifts on the couch so she's kneeling on the cushion beside Tara and Tara knows that appearances are very deceptive. Dawn might look sweet and young and innocent but in reality she's a century old being with a purpose. A purpose that Buffy stole from her. Yet how can Tara explain that Buffy was tired of being a Slayer, of having the weight of the world on her shoulders, or that Buffy didn't want to watch someone else die. Tara sighs as she looks down in her lap.
"You know it's the truth,' Dawn angrily says. "We're nothing more than a second thought for Willow and Giles and Xander. It's always been about Buffy and now she's gone."
Dawn's voice breaks on her last words and Tara wordlessly gathers her into her arms.
"I'm not real!" Dawn cries out. "I'm not real!"
"You are real," Tara says.
"No I am not and Buffy knew that."
There's no words that can convince Dawn otherwise so Tara leans forward and places her lips against Dawn's. It's supposed to be a chaste kiss, a simple kiss to show that Dawn that she's very much real. But instead of a quiet kiss, Tara feels a spark of energy pulsating between the two of them. Dawn sighs as she wraps her arms around Tara's body and Tara knows she's never felt quite like this with anyone else. Not even Willow. Her mind works overtime as she tries to figure out what it means. Does it mean that Dawn's right? That Dawn is nothing more than a facsimile of a girl when in reality she's pure energy? Or does it mean something else, something dark and secret that Tara doesn't want to explore.
She pulls away from Dawn. "You're real."
Dawn shakes her head in denial. She pulls away from Tara and Tara feels an ache of loss that she knows she shouldn't be feeling for Buffy's kid sister.
"No, I am not," Dawn tiredly says. "If I was then no one would leave me. But everyone leaves. Buffy, Xander, Mom, you, the list goes on and on."
"You're real," Tara repeats as she presses her lips against Dawn's again. "But you're fifteen and I am not."
Dawn laughs, it's a bitter and ugly sound. And Tara knows what Dawn's not saying: she's a lot older than fifteen no matter what she looks like. Tara sighs.
"Dawnie, I will never leave you behind. I'll always be here but I can't be here in that way and I know that you don't feel that way about me."
"Do you promise to never leave me?" Dawn asks.
Tara nods her response and Dawn leans against her with a sigh. For now, they'll ignore the giant elephant in the room. And perhaps in time, Tara will forget what it felt like to be kissing Dawn. Maybe just maybe they'll be able to write this moment off as a side effect of grief and guilt. Tara wonders if she repeats to herself that it meant nothing if she'll actually ever believe it. Somehow she's certain that she won't ever believe that particular lie.
((END))
Author: Aaronlisa
Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Pairing/Characters: Tara/Dawn
Rating: FR13
Disclaimer: Buffy the Vampire Slayer belongs to Joss Whedon and company.
Prompts: Written for the Tara round at femslash_minis for snowpuppies who wanted the pairing along with mention of Willow, cuddles and a loss without character bashing, super-duper-OOC and sweetness.
Notes: Set after the events of "The Gift."
Summary: Tara tries to convince Dawn that's she real.
Word Count: 1017
She can't help but think that it should feel wrong, very wrong, for her to be cuddling with Buffy's baby sister on the couch in the Summers family home. It's not as if she's meaning to have inappropriate thoughts, it's just that Dawn, in her grief, is curled up against her body in the exact same way that Willow normally curls up against her when they're tired from having far too much fun in the bedroom.
Tara sighs as she tries her best not to feel betrayed by Willow right now. She can understand why it's so important for her to stay behind with Dawn since Anya and Spike are off somewhere by themselves drowning their sorrows. After all, Willow, Giles and Xander have to take care of things since Buffy's dead. It shouldn't hurt that her girlfriend is more focused on Buffy instead of Tara. But it does hurt. After all, for quite some time (time that she's not quite determined herself) she's been nothing more than a zombie for an evil goddess. Tara's thoughts are racing in her head and it seems like Dawn's the only thing that's anchoring her to this world and Dawn's so fragile that Tara's certain the younger girl isn't really up to the job.
Buffy's gone. And Willow's off dealing with the aftermath while Tara is left behind to be nothing more than a glorified babysitter. Somehow no matter how she tries to rationalize things, there's no way Tara can make the sting of hurt go away. Right now, Tara wants nothing more than her girlfriend to be there on the couch, holding her, comforting her.
"She didn't have to jump, you know," Dawn quietly mutters.
For a moment, Tara's confuses as to who Dawn means.
"I could have jumped instead," Dawn says. "But she wouldn't let me. I know why though."
"Why?" Tara asks. She doesn't think she wants to know the reason why, or the reason that Dawn believes because she's fairly certain it won't be pleasant. But she's always been so polite that she can't not ask.
"Because she wanted to be with our mom," Dawn spits out. "She never thought I was a real girl, I was nothing but a fake sister."
"Dawnie, don't," Tara says.
"Don't what? Don't admit the truth? Don't be honest?" Dawn says. "It's why you're here and Willow, Giles and Xander aren't. I am not worthy of their time."
"That's not true," Tara replies without any conviction. (She wonders why she's been left behind too.) "They need to figure out things."
"She was the Slayer, it should have been me that jumped, now who's going to take care of me? Sunnydale and everything else? Faith's in jail. It's not as if the Council can pull out a Slayer whenever they want."
"That's what Willow and the others are trying to do, figure out a way to keep you safe."
"I'm not a little girl anymore," Dawn says.
She shifts on the couch so she's kneeling on the cushion beside Tara and Tara knows that appearances are very deceptive. Dawn might look sweet and young and innocent but in reality she's a century old being with a purpose. A purpose that Buffy stole from her. Yet how can Tara explain that Buffy was tired of being a Slayer, of having the weight of the world on her shoulders, or that Buffy didn't want to watch someone else die. Tara sighs as she looks down in her lap.
"You know it's the truth,' Dawn angrily says. "We're nothing more than a second thought for Willow and Giles and Xander. It's always been about Buffy and now she's gone."
Dawn's voice breaks on her last words and Tara wordlessly gathers her into her arms.
"I'm not real!" Dawn cries out. "I'm not real!"
"You are real," Tara says.
"No I am not and Buffy knew that."
There's no words that can convince Dawn otherwise so Tara leans forward and places her lips against Dawn's. It's supposed to be a chaste kiss, a simple kiss to show that Dawn that she's very much real. But instead of a quiet kiss, Tara feels a spark of energy pulsating between the two of them. Dawn sighs as she wraps her arms around Tara's body and Tara knows she's never felt quite like this with anyone else. Not even Willow. Her mind works overtime as she tries to figure out what it means. Does it mean that Dawn's right? That Dawn is nothing more than a facsimile of a girl when in reality she's pure energy? Or does it mean something else, something dark and secret that Tara doesn't want to explore.
She pulls away from Dawn. "You're real."
Dawn shakes her head in denial. She pulls away from Tara and Tara feels an ache of loss that she knows she shouldn't be feeling for Buffy's kid sister.
"No, I am not," Dawn tiredly says. "If I was then no one would leave me. But everyone leaves. Buffy, Xander, Mom, you, the list goes on and on."
"You're real," Tara repeats as she presses her lips against Dawn's again. "But you're fifteen and I am not."
Dawn laughs, it's a bitter and ugly sound. And Tara knows what Dawn's not saying: she's a lot older than fifteen no matter what she looks like. Tara sighs.
"Dawnie, I will never leave you behind. I'll always be here but I can't be here in that way and I know that you don't feel that way about me."
"Do you promise to never leave me?" Dawn asks.
Tara nods her response and Dawn leans against her with a sigh. For now, they'll ignore the giant elephant in the room. And perhaps in time, Tara will forget what it felt like to be kissing Dawn. Maybe just maybe they'll be able to write this moment off as a side effect of grief and guilt. Tara wonders if she repeats to herself that it meant nothing if she'll actually ever believe it. Somehow she's certain that she won't ever believe that particular lie.
((END))