Kumquat or any word that rhymes with it is favored more than most
"I guess my plan is to keep working at Suncoast video until I figure out what I want to do."
"We think you've got such potential. You could be an astronaut."
"Problem solved. I'll be an astronaut."
My fridge is mostly alcohol. Most of which isn't mine, it's from various visitors who leave stuff that, really, I'm good, I don't like Miller Lite. You're not leaving anything worthwhile, it's not a win for me that you've left it. My wine cabinet is full of mostly not very good wine. I do have salt & pepper, but they're not open . I don't have sugar or flour, so don't bother asking for a cup of either. I have enough cleaning supplies to last for a few years. Yes, in fact, I did undress in my middle of my living room four days ago, and my clothes are still there. My Chucks are by my bed, my Vans in the bathroom, my herringbone flats in the kitchen next to my work shoes. My "coffee" table is covered with half written Christmas cards. I have a poem scrawled and crossed through on my wall. I have various lighters strewn about. There's also a pack of cigarettes on the floor next to my bed. I don't smoke. I don't have any pictures hung, but I have several sitting on the floor as place holders, waiting to be nailed up. I keep thinking, why bother? I'll just move in a minute. This isn't permanent. Except, I'm not sure where I'm going. For a while, the goal was get out: get out of a bad job, get out of living with people that I had out-grown, get out of Chicago. I'm out. So, um, now what?
Oh I know. Anything. Thanks. That narrowed it down. Something I like? I haven't liked anything for longer than a hot minute since I was 20. I'm rather indifferent on most things. I think I thought it would hurt less if I didn't. But I'm finding, I'm unable to decide.
I used to ask alot of questions. I wanted to know, but I don't think I liked the answers. Growing up sucks.
I should say it's taken 2 hours to write this. It's 12am and I still don't want to go to bed. And then I'll not want to wake up.