of the one-cheeked and (what?!) posted on the internet varieties
In case you haven't figured it out, the title of this post is in reference to butts. Yes that. Now for some explaining.
1) The one-cheeked variety: I find a certain vacuum in my vocabulary to describe something that is done poorly or half-heartedly. The typical college student would call this "half-assed," but I don't feel comfortable using that term and usually just substitute "half-(insert hand gesture and allusion)." In order to surmount this ambiguity and awkwardness, Keri and I decided to devise a new phrase that means the same thing as "half-assed." The new, child-friendly version is "one-cheeked." Use this term freely when saying, "I don't want to do a one-cheek job on this paper" or "He was only playing the game one-cheeked." I'm glad that we could help you solve your linguistic dilemmas.
2) The posted on the internet variety:
Cast:
Cory - college youth group volunteer
Me - me
Jenna - a youth at church
Enely - 1st time youth at church (I just met her tonight)
Cory: Did you know there's a picture of your butt on the internet?
Me: No . . . um, are you serious?!
Cory: Yeah, I think it's on Jenna's myspace.
Me: What?! Why does she have a picture of my butt? . . . Jenna, did you post a picture of my butt on your myspace?
Jenna: Yeah, it's of Amanda pointing at it.
Enely: Oh, that's you! Awesome!
Me: Jenna! You posted a picture of my butt without telling me?! Enely! You recognized my butt before you even knew my face?!
So, there you have it people. If you're friends with Jenna on myspace, you can see my butt. I'm pretty sure it is clothed.
1) The one-cheeked variety: I find a certain vacuum in my vocabulary to describe something that is done poorly or half-heartedly. The typical college student would call this "half-assed," but I don't feel comfortable using that term and usually just substitute "half-(insert hand gesture and allusion)." In order to surmount this ambiguity and awkwardness, Keri and I decided to devise a new phrase that means the same thing as "half-assed." The new, child-friendly version is "one-cheeked." Use this term freely when saying, "I don't want to do a one-cheek job on this paper" or "He was only playing the game one-cheeked." I'm glad that we could help you solve your linguistic dilemmas.
2) The posted on the internet variety:
Cast:
Cory - college youth group volunteer
Me - me
Jenna - a youth at church
Enely - 1st time youth at church (I just met her tonight)
Cory: Did you know there's a picture of your butt on the internet?
Me: No . . . um, are you serious?!
Cory: Yeah, I think it's on Jenna's myspace.
Me: What?! Why does she have a picture of my butt? . . . Jenna, did you post a picture of my butt on your myspace?
Jenna: Yeah, it's of Amanda pointing at it.
Enely: Oh, that's you! Awesome!
Me: Jenna! You posted a picture of my butt without telling me?! Enely! You recognized my butt before you even knew my face?!
So, there you have it people. If you're friends with Jenna on myspace, you can see my butt. I'm pretty sure it is clothed.