(no subject)
Remember in high school how easy it was to procrastinate and do homework until 3 in the morning, then wake up at 6 to get ready for school? How come I can not do that anymore? Geez, that really makes me feel old...
I'm attempting to type out a lab, and I could care less if I finish it or not. I just want to sleep. I wish that I had the motivation to get through this semester. I wonder what happened to my drive to succeed. I bet that it went down the crapper, along with some other memories of the past.
I want to breath. I want to spend a day with nothing to do but relax and sleep. I want a day where I am not thinking about school or work or anything else in the back of my mind. I want a day where I can hang out with my family and friends and laugh. I don't laugh and joke around as much as I used to, even though I'm disturbingly happy. I want to smile until my cheeks hurt, darn it.
Jackie and I were talking about our futures, and I used to be so dead-sure about what I want to do. But in a weird way, my mind-set has changed through the course of last semester. I grown up considerably and now I realize that some of my dreams are childish or unrealistic; I want to be everything, but can only be a few of these things.
Nothing's perfect, though sometimes I feel as if I'm trying to obtain that sense of perfection. I'm moving to fast, but not fast enough. I don't think that I can keep up with things. I'm lagging and don't think that I can ever catch up.
I'm attempting to type out a lab, and I could care less if I finish it or not. I just want to sleep. I wish that I had the motivation to get through this semester. I wonder what happened to my drive to succeed. I bet that it went down the crapper, along with some other memories of the past.
I want to breath. I want to spend a day with nothing to do but relax and sleep. I want a day where I am not thinking about school or work or anything else in the back of my mind. I want a day where I can hang out with my family and friends and laugh. I don't laugh and joke around as much as I used to, even though I'm disturbingly happy. I want to smile until my cheeks hurt, darn it.
Jackie and I were talking about our futures, and I used to be so dead-sure about what I want to do. But in a weird way, my mind-set has changed through the course of last semester. I grown up considerably and now I realize that some of my dreams are childish or unrealistic; I want to be everything, but can only be a few of these things.
Nothing's perfect, though sometimes I feel as if I'm trying to obtain that sense of perfection. I'm moving to fast, but not fast enough. I don't think that I can keep up with things. I'm lagging and don't think that I can ever catch up.