(no subject)
yesterday was a good day. :)
i had a dr spurber appointment. we determined that the reason ryan's disgusting hick personality seemed acceptable to me for so long was that its made up of exactly the same republican, self-absorbed yet insecure, demanding bullshit that my mother's was and in lacking that, i was attracted to ryan. and ... i also decided that i'm never going to speak to him again by choice because he's a disgusting son of a bitch because i can't take his bullshit criticism anymore and thats all he provides. its like i gave him everything i had and in return he gave me a few smacks in the face (metaphorically). gah. anyway. actually no. not anyway. i have more to add to this tangent. yesterday morning at 5 am ryan texted me that he was going to come over at 10:30 am. naturally, i sleep till noon most days. and then he yelled at me all fucking morning on the phone for ruining his day because he "wanted to come over and see how hot the new haircut was" (and then i said "does that mean u were requiring me to do my hair?" and he said "i always expect u to spend at least an hour getting ready for me" and i said "getting fucking ready for you, you fucking asshole?" and then i realized that that's what i used to do without complaint every time he brought his self-righteous ass by). and then i found out that my uncle has cancer... and i was crying. a lot. and yet he continued to fucking insult me and god i totally just... ugh flipped the fuck out. i hate this kid. he's like the kind of person who really does not deserve to live anymore.
after my dr spurbing my dad dropped me at dan's house which was contained of a great many people. got a bit tipsy. me and liz mended our cold war and liz is awesome. and i had a lot of awkward conversations with people about really awkward subjects. i do now have the confirmation that i'm the hottest neuhaus, which makes my life more jovial. i had a really pleasant evening. like really a lot. i need to randolph it up more often. rob drove me home which was very sweet and he, liz, and i had a significant discussion about... i dont remember exactly but it was satisfying. got home... pulled off not being able to walk in a straight line in front of my dad and pat and ate a steak. lindsay came home and she was all omigod lol lol i'm so blazed lol. and we talked. and she definitely was not "blazed".
and then ...i ....was ....rejected which was a strange experience, but its actually not that horrible and im optimistic anyway and.. eh doesnt matter.
so i woke up this morning and i think i have a tumor on the inside of my eyelid which really sucks. and ryan is trying to tell me off because he called last night and i sounded drunk and if i sounded drunk that must mean that i was having sex with 15 people and since he's almighty ryan mosca he has the authority to verbally abuse me for it. and im like snap snap snap u motherfucking cunt go fuck urself.
ugh. hate that kid.
i had a dr spurber appointment. we determined that the reason ryan's disgusting hick personality seemed acceptable to me for so long was that its made up of exactly the same republican, self-absorbed yet insecure, demanding bullshit that my mother's was and in lacking that, i was attracted to ryan. and ... i also decided that i'm never going to speak to him again by choice because he's a disgusting son of a bitch because i can't take his bullshit criticism anymore and thats all he provides. its like i gave him everything i had and in return he gave me a few smacks in the face (metaphorically). gah. anyway. actually no. not anyway. i have more to add to this tangent. yesterday morning at 5 am ryan texted me that he was going to come over at 10:30 am. naturally, i sleep till noon most days. and then he yelled at me all fucking morning on the phone for ruining his day because he "wanted to come over and see how hot the new haircut was" (and then i said "does that mean u were requiring me to do my hair?" and he said "i always expect u to spend at least an hour getting ready for me" and i said "getting fucking ready for you, you fucking asshole?" and then i realized that that's what i used to do without complaint every time he brought his self-righteous ass by). and then i found out that my uncle has cancer... and i was crying. a lot. and yet he continued to fucking insult me and god i totally just... ugh flipped the fuck out. i hate this kid. he's like the kind of person who really does not deserve to live anymore.
after my dr spurbing my dad dropped me at dan's house which was contained of a great many people. got a bit tipsy. me and liz mended our cold war and liz is awesome. and i had a lot of awkward conversations with people about really awkward subjects. i do now have the confirmation that i'm the hottest neuhaus, which makes my life more jovial. i had a really pleasant evening. like really a lot. i need to randolph it up more often. rob drove me home which was very sweet and he, liz, and i had a significant discussion about... i dont remember exactly but it was satisfying. got home... pulled off not being able to walk in a straight line in front of my dad and pat and ate a steak. lindsay came home and she was all omigod lol lol i'm so blazed lol. and we talked. and she definitely was not "blazed".
and then ...i ....was ....rejected which was a strange experience, but its actually not that horrible and im optimistic anyway and.. eh doesnt matter.
so i woke up this morning and i think i have a tumor on the inside of my eyelid which really sucks. and ryan is trying to tell me off because he called last night and i sounded drunk and if i sounded drunk that must mean that i was having sex with 15 people and since he's almighty ryan mosca he has the authority to verbally abuse me for it. and im like snap snap snap u motherfucking cunt go fuck urself.
ugh. hate that kid.