Cooking with Catch.

[excessivepurple]

HOW TO HAVE BREAKFAST LIKE CATCH O'SHANE

Ingredients:
1 pkt Organic Vita-Brits
1 carton Vitasoy soy milk
1 bowl
0 spoons
1 pair chopsticks
1 kettle
1 dishwasher
1 Black Lightning Sword of the Ancient Glass-Bellied Ninjas

Directions

*Steal the one remaining clean bowl in the house from your ten-year-old brother.
*Put two Vita-Brits in bowl.
*Cover Vita-Brits with soy milk.
*Be distracted by interesting bubbles in the kettle.
*Name your kettle Henry. Decide he bears a remarkable resemblance to a Glass-Bellied Penguin. Sing a song about Henry, the Glass-Bellied Penguin.
*Simultaneously allow cereal to become very, very soggy.
*Whine.
*Poke the dishwasher that contains every spoon in the house.
*Open the dishwasher mid-cycle. Inhale boiling steam. Choke.
*Eat soggy cereal, with chopsticks.
*Make up another verse of the Glass-Bellied Penguin Song.
*Use chopsticks to fend off brother's vengeful mini-katana attack.
*Make up a different song about the Black Lightning Sword of the Ancient Glass-Bellied Ninjas. Do not question why they are Glass-Bellied Ninjas. They Just Are.
*Rinse bowl.
*Wash and dry chopsticks.
*Try to put hair up with chopsticks like Zhang Ziyi in Rush Hour 2.
*Fail.
*Drink green tea.
*Ponder the origin of the word 'cactus'.
*Sidle off to "work".