My Vagina's Monologue:
I feel as though the worst thing I could possibly do to myself is deny myself. In any form. Thought, emotion, behavior, social capacity... All are only pseudo controlled by my own sheer will. The rest is fucking INSTINCT. All the way. And trial and error. I don't feel bad for the way I think until my thought process has been proven erroneous or non linear (it happens ONCE in a while...) (The prior is my explanation for the following:)
Men of my general generation don't like talking about sexism. You can literally watch them perk up for the "sex" and squirm for the "ism". It's as though they tend to understand what they're being addressed with, but refuse to acknowlege that they are, in fact, part of the very system in question. (Merely being a MAN shows that you would never know what it's like to be a WOMAN, therefore have no room to judge/place value on "womanness".) Many men approached with these types of situations automatically think they're being blamed for single handedly fuelling the gender biases and social constructs of male superiority, and immediately tune out of the conversation.
Obviously, this is irrational. No femenist's goal is blaming one specific male for the shortcomings of an entire gender's social programming. Denying the problem, however, by ignoring it or even suggesting that a phenomenon such as sexism doesnt exist (it's happened.), is not necessarily the best way to deal with the situation. In fact, it's borderline insulting. For a heterosexual male to expect a woman to be open to his interests, ignoring a woman interests is unfair, unbalanced and a good way to become VERY uninteresting, VERY fast.
For all of you males out there who are scoffing the "I dont give a fuck" tune: you can count yourself lucky that most of the "women" in my generation are so OBSESSED with the process of how to impress you (and usually not much else...) that they're oblivious to the fact that you plain old don't respect them as humans.
I'm not trying to displace the power that the feminist movement of the last 40 years has bestowed upon society. Rather, I'm mourning the loss of the ideals that existed in that time. Yes, the majority of men tend to have a sexism complex, whether it be subconscious or out in the open (which is more often than you think). My generation has not seen through this phenomenon, although gender today is not as much a dividing factor as it was the generation before us. ( Unfortunaltely, progress does not necessarily mean finality.)
No, our generation is being spoon fed our morals and social beliefs through the media, THAT is the huge difference. And much of the media is male-oriented. Any advertisements or depictions of women in sitcoms, etc... are the ultimate manifestation of what a MAN would want woman to be like: Cleaning, cooking being hot, making out and.... not much else. (referance: One of the most popular tv shows in recent history: Everybody Loves Ramond.) All male hygene commercials feature females, but only hot ones being pheramone crazed nymphomaniacs with nothing better to do with their free time but hang around to catch a whiff of your cologne and immediately want to fuck you. The one I'm still marvelling at is: Burger King proclaiming "you're the man" with a close up of a woman, stoicly finishing her spicy jalepeno sandwich, implying, of course both that a.) women usually can't do it because they're weak and b) tthe only way to be "somebody" is to be "the man". The media doesn't necessarily represent, or fairly cater to, female members of society, who make up approx. 50% of the population, in case that figure has been lost inside the bible somewhere.
Race is such a huge issue in our country, but the problems regarding gender issues have not been addressed. Gender, before race, is the broadest division humanity can draw between each other. Sexism effects not only half the population of women, but also the race they may be affiliated with, whereas racial profiling is directed at a smaller and more specific audience. Socially, there is a divide, but it's being ignored. Before we can begin to treat the social wounds inflicted on certain minorities, we have to fix the things that afflict us on a higer level: M v F
I'd like to think that I'm secure about my femininity. I'm not, and I garantee you that if you're female and reading this you aren't either.
Why is it so hard for men to admit that, as human, women are equally as awesome at being alive. I know that sounds loaded and all, but in many aspects of life I see men refraining from association with femeninity other than just for the sole purpose of sex and sexual relations. If you are male reading this right now, ask yourself how ready you are to say something to the effect of "women, to me, represent a strong aspect of our species culture and I fully, wholeheartedly appreciate them for *that* reason. Do you flinch? Shudder? fully disagree? Many men do than most people know, and I see it on a daily basis.
Now, I know what all you guys are thinking: "what a sexist feminist bra burning bitch". I would make a case for the implications of males sexism in this country if I didnt feel I had a bias: being a woman. All I'm doing here is stating what I see and am effected by from my position as a woman. Doing anything further would be inaccurate, sexist and otherwise unfair. If any males out there want to express how they feel they've been effected by societys placement of gender roles, I'd be more than interested in hearing about it. Unfortunately, though, to me it seems that many men out there don't take an interest in it, therefore, I can only conclude that the instilled male gender roles in our society are comfortable for them.
I'm not a male basher.
I looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove men. Men are mysterious, puzzleing. Most of the men I know carry themselves with such an essence that their presence manifests itself overwhelmingly solidly within a room. You always know where they are. What I envy about men is that they always seem to know what they want. They know how to articulate themselves in a very generalized way, a way that can be understood easily. You're always informed of what a man thinks, even though some details may be missing. Many men have made great accomplishments throughout history; but as HUMANS, not as MEN.
Sexism is not over. Since the sexes find each other so captivating, havable, attrective and impossible, we may never be able to fully understand each other's way of thinking. But in the interum, a level of respect is deserved on either party.
So far, I haven't seen it.
Men of my general generation don't like talking about sexism. You can literally watch them perk up for the "sex" and squirm for the "ism". It's as though they tend to understand what they're being addressed with, but refuse to acknowlege that they are, in fact, part of the very system in question. (Merely being a MAN shows that you would never know what it's like to be a WOMAN, therefore have no room to judge/place value on "womanness".) Many men approached with these types of situations automatically think they're being blamed for single handedly fuelling the gender biases and social constructs of male superiority, and immediately tune out of the conversation.
Obviously, this is irrational. No femenist's goal is blaming one specific male for the shortcomings of an entire gender's social programming. Denying the problem, however, by ignoring it or even suggesting that a phenomenon such as sexism doesnt exist (it's happened.), is not necessarily the best way to deal with the situation. In fact, it's borderline insulting. For a heterosexual male to expect a woman to be open to his interests, ignoring a woman interests is unfair, unbalanced and a good way to become VERY uninteresting, VERY fast.
For all of you males out there who are scoffing the "I dont give a fuck" tune: you can count yourself lucky that most of the "women" in my generation are so OBSESSED with the process of how to impress you (and usually not much else...) that they're oblivious to the fact that you plain old don't respect them as humans.
I'm not trying to displace the power that the feminist movement of the last 40 years has bestowed upon society. Rather, I'm mourning the loss of the ideals that existed in that time. Yes, the majority of men tend to have a sexism complex, whether it be subconscious or out in the open (which is more often than you think). My generation has not seen through this phenomenon, although gender today is not as much a dividing factor as it was the generation before us. ( Unfortunaltely, progress does not necessarily mean finality.)
No, our generation is being spoon fed our morals and social beliefs through the media, THAT is the huge difference. And much of the media is male-oriented. Any advertisements or depictions of women in sitcoms, etc... are the ultimate manifestation of what a MAN would want woman to be like: Cleaning, cooking being hot, making out and.... not much else. (referance: One of the most popular tv shows in recent history: Everybody Loves Ramond.) All male hygene commercials feature females, but only hot ones being pheramone crazed nymphomaniacs with nothing better to do with their free time but hang around to catch a whiff of your cologne and immediately want to fuck you. The one I'm still marvelling at is: Burger King proclaiming "you're the man" with a close up of a woman, stoicly finishing her spicy jalepeno sandwich, implying, of course both that a.) women usually can't do it because they're weak and b) tthe only way to be "somebody" is to be "the man". The media doesn't necessarily represent, or fairly cater to, female members of society, who make up approx. 50% of the population, in case that figure has been lost inside the bible somewhere.
Race is such a huge issue in our country, but the problems regarding gender issues have not been addressed. Gender, before race, is the broadest division humanity can draw between each other. Sexism effects not only half the population of women, but also the race they may be affiliated with, whereas racial profiling is directed at a smaller and more specific audience. Socially, there is a divide, but it's being ignored. Before we can begin to treat the social wounds inflicted on certain minorities, we have to fix the things that afflict us on a higer level: M v F
I'd like to think that I'm secure about my femininity. I'm not, and I garantee you that if you're female and reading this you aren't either.
Why is it so hard for men to admit that, as human, women are equally as awesome at being alive. I know that sounds loaded and all, but in many aspects of life I see men refraining from association with femeninity other than just for the sole purpose of sex and sexual relations. If you are male reading this right now, ask yourself how ready you are to say something to the effect of "women, to me, represent a strong aspect of our species culture and I fully, wholeheartedly appreciate them for *that* reason. Do you flinch? Shudder? fully disagree? Many men do than most people know, and I see it on a daily basis.
Now, I know what all you guys are thinking: "what a sexist feminist bra burning bitch". I would make a case for the implications of males sexism in this country if I didnt feel I had a bias: being a woman. All I'm doing here is stating what I see and am effected by from my position as a woman. Doing anything further would be inaccurate, sexist and otherwise unfair. If any males out there want to express how they feel they've been effected by societys placement of gender roles, I'd be more than interested in hearing about it. Unfortunately, though, to me it seems that many men out there don't take an interest in it, therefore, I can only conclude that the instilled male gender roles in our society are comfortable for them.
I'm not a male basher.
I looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove men. Men are mysterious, puzzleing. Most of the men I know carry themselves with such an essence that their presence manifests itself overwhelmingly solidly within a room. You always know where they are. What I envy about men is that they always seem to know what they want. They know how to articulate themselves in a very generalized way, a way that can be understood easily. You're always informed of what a man thinks, even though some details may be missing. Many men have made great accomplishments throughout history; but as HUMANS, not as MEN.
Sexism is not over. Since the sexes find each other so captivating, havable, attrective and impossible, we may never be able to fully understand each other's way of thinking. But in the interum, a level of respect is deserved on either party.
So far, I haven't seen it.