Watch your future
Slowly go right down the fucking shitter. It's an experience to be held... I am almost Guaranteed an F in Algebra. Grand.
The only thing I had left to hang onto in my life was college. I want to fucking graduate so to at least say I did SOMETHING with my fucking life. Instead, I get failure. Not that I should be surprised because for all my life everything I have ever attempted has always ended in failure. Every love interest, school, College the 1st time, Work.... Jesus, the only thing I am really good at is FAILING. They have all been for different reasons, usually outside influence that makes me question whether I am God's sick joke DVD. You know the one, you are ashamed of owning but you find the movie so fucking funny. That's about where I sit on God's DVD rack. I seriously question at this point what the fucking point of giving me life or allowing me to continue to live is, if all I am going to get for my life is butt fucking every fucking time I try to do something with my life. I mean what the fuck does he want? Does he want me to be a completely miserable, single old man, that has nothing to offer anyone or anything because he has lost all sense of anything? Because SERIOUSLY that is EXACTLY where the fuck I am headed.
I mean at this point I would say I am probably the most depressed I have been since Carol and I split. We all remember that glorious DarkElf. The only difference is this time around I am not dealing with the emotion with sadness. I am dealing with it in complete rage and fucking anger. I am GOD DAMNED TIRED OF BEING A FUCKING FAILURE AND I SWEAR TO CHRIST IF I KNEW THAT I COULD COMMIT SUICIDE AND NOT GO TO A: HELL or B: NOTHINGNESS EVERYONE FUCKING ONE OF YOU WOULD SEE A FUCKING CORPSE NEXT TIME YOU CAME OVER.
However, since the only options of suicide are A or B that doesn't help me either. So I am just forced to deal with being a complete piece of failure shit that makes myself angry that I know I am better than this, and every time I try to take steps to put myself where I belong, I get knocked the fuck down.
I am tired of this fucking Popsicle stand. I'm OUT!
The only thing I had left to hang onto in my life was college. I want to fucking graduate so to at least say I did SOMETHING with my fucking life. Instead, I get failure. Not that I should be surprised because for all my life everything I have ever attempted has always ended in failure. Every love interest, school, College the 1st time, Work.... Jesus, the only thing I am really good at is FAILING. They have all been for different reasons, usually outside influence that makes me question whether I am God's sick joke DVD. You know the one, you are ashamed of owning but you find the movie so fucking funny. That's about where I sit on God's DVD rack. I seriously question at this point what the fucking point of giving me life or allowing me to continue to live is, if all I am going to get for my life is butt fucking every fucking time I try to do something with my life. I mean what the fuck does he want? Does he want me to be a completely miserable, single old man, that has nothing to offer anyone or anything because he has lost all sense of anything? Because SERIOUSLY that is EXACTLY where the fuck I am headed.
I mean at this point I would say I am probably the most depressed I have been since Carol and I split. We all remember that glorious DarkElf. The only difference is this time around I am not dealing with the emotion with sadness. I am dealing with it in complete rage and fucking anger. I am GOD DAMNED TIRED OF BEING A FUCKING FAILURE AND I SWEAR TO CHRIST IF I KNEW THAT I COULD COMMIT SUICIDE AND NOT GO TO A: HELL or B: NOTHINGNESS EVERYONE FUCKING ONE OF YOU WOULD SEE A FUCKING CORPSE NEXT TIME YOU CAME OVER.
However, since the only options of suicide are A or B that doesn't help me either. So I am just forced to deal with being a complete piece of failure shit that makes myself angry that I know I am better than this, and every time I try to take steps to put myself where I belong, I get knocked the fuck down.
I am tired of this fucking Popsicle stand. I'm OUT!