sometimes comments are nice
+ today while at the doctor's office, an older African American man held the door open for me and said, "i'm not fresh and free, but you are pretty." hey, compliments are hard to come by these days, so i'll take it!
+ today i met some with some friends at a wine bar, and it was ladies only, and it was really nice. i have really been into bonding with women because i feel like women go through so much ish (and good stuff) that is pretty unique to women, so i like hearing stories and learning from other women. i feel like that is key -- that whenever i chat with a girlfriend or meet up with a group of women, i learn so much from their life experiences, perspectives, etc. i think i'd written this before but in the past i never really fostered these types of relationships, and i am just starting to. it is new for me and i am digging it. i feel like as women we really need each other's support.
+ another semi-related thing is that i have been told by another editor who works on Hyphen that i am so nice. haha. she is the opposite, very direct and more on the negative side. i also have another friend (who happens to also work on Hyphen) who is known to be kinda direct and mean. i am seeing the benefits of this, because if you really want to get a point across, sometimes it's easier to be direct even if it's not nice or it hurts. i know i try to shield my constructive comments in a way where i'm compliment-critiquing. in teacher lingo, it's called a complement sandwich (compliment-critique-compliment). i have noticed though that the compliment sandwich doesn't always work. sometimes people hear the compliment and run with that and don't hear the critique. so i am going to experiment with just critiquing. i feel like in part that i've lived my life trying to make people feel good about themselves (but hey, who doesn't need a confident boost now and then?) but perhaps not being completely honest. i'm going to try to be nice AND honest, and direct, from now on.
+ i have realized that since i have turned 30 (just kidding, i just like to use that as a milestone marker), i began thinking children are really cool. i mean, this is totally, totally new, of course, it's because i'm a mom now, but i really think children are amazing and i actually like being around them. in a few weeks me and Tony are gonna watch someone's kid so she and her husband can go out on a date. it will be fun, i'm really looking forward to it.
+ thanks for reading!
+ today i met some with some friends at a wine bar, and it was ladies only, and it was really nice. i have really been into bonding with women because i feel like women go through so much ish (and good stuff) that is pretty unique to women, so i like hearing stories and learning from other women. i feel like that is key -- that whenever i chat with a girlfriend or meet up with a group of women, i learn so much from their life experiences, perspectives, etc. i think i'd written this before but in the past i never really fostered these types of relationships, and i am just starting to. it is new for me and i am digging it. i feel like as women we really need each other's support.
+ another semi-related thing is that i have been told by another editor who works on Hyphen that i am so nice. haha. she is the opposite, very direct and more on the negative side. i also have another friend (who happens to also work on Hyphen) who is known to be kinda direct and mean. i am seeing the benefits of this, because if you really want to get a point across, sometimes it's easier to be direct even if it's not nice or it hurts. i know i try to shield my constructive comments in a way where i'm compliment-critiquing. in teacher lingo, it's called a complement sandwich (compliment-critique-compliment). i have noticed though that the compliment sandwich doesn't always work. sometimes people hear the compliment and run with that and don't hear the critique. so i am going to experiment with just critiquing. i feel like in part that i've lived my life trying to make people feel good about themselves (but hey, who doesn't need a confident boost now and then?) but perhaps not being completely honest. i'm going to try to be nice AND honest, and direct, from now on.
+ i have realized that since i have turned 30 (just kidding, i just like to use that as a milestone marker), i began thinking children are really cool. i mean, this is totally, totally new, of course, it's because i'm a mom now, but i really think children are amazing and i actually like being around them. in a few weeks me and Tony are gonna watch someone's kid so she and her husband can go out on a date. it will be fun, i'm really looking forward to it.
+ thanks for reading!