The Official Rene Rosa Survey Challenge!
I, Rene Luis Rosa, am tired of lame ass surveys. I'm making a simple survey that is guaranteed to entertain and enthrall all who read and fill them out. Are you ready for this shit? If not, then you best start getting ready, or else you're going to feel like you were raped in your asshole with a pinecone with open fronds.
Here it goes.
1] Is English your first language? If not, have you ever worked at a fast food joint?
2] How do you like your steak? If you don't like steak, are you human? If you are human, were you abused as a child? If you weren't abused, did you deserve to be?
3] How many keys do you have on your keychain?
4] How many of those keys have you tried to insert into your urethra?
5] Do you like the taste of someone else's lipstick?
6] Have you ever shit your pants as an adult?
7] Have you ever shit someone ELSE's pants as an adult?
8] Have you ever masturbated in the shower?
9] Have you ever watched someone masturbate in the shower?
10] Have you ever been in the shower after someone masturbated and only knew because there was something that looked like shampoo in the drain but wasn't turning into suds like shampoo should?
12] Are you wondering what happened to number 11?
13] What was the last thing you put in your mouth that wasn't food?
11] Are you now shocked to see that 11 wasn't skipped, it just didn't feel like showing up till now?
14] This is not a question? (just because it has a question mark, doesn't mean it is a valid question) Do you think that this is a question.
15] If you were given a million dollars, would you buy me something?
16] Speaking of which, can I borrow 3 dollars?
17] What is your favorite video game of ALL TIME?
18] If you had a super power that came out of your hair, what would it be?
19] Would you test products on animals if it meant that you or anyone else in the world wouldn't die of AIDS or Cancer? Answer yes. If you answer no, we will still all read it as yes just to give you the benefit of the doubt that you were in fact sane and cared about your loved ones.
20] Would you eat human if it was legal?
21] If you have ever swallowed semen, did that last question kind of make you think for a second "well I've eaten potential humans"?
22] Have you listened to Evil Adam, Cousin, or Ailanthus yet ?
23] If you haven't, what in the name of all that is fuck are you waiting for?
24] Is this enough for you now?
25] Did you wish this survey ended at 24?
26] Did you realize that there is a legal amount of insect parts you can have in all food for humans?
27] Does that make you sad because you wonder if any of your relatives are in people's food, you fucking bottom feeding roach?
28] Do you watch nature shows specifically hoping to see animals having sex?
29] If you said yes to 28, are you currently in jail?
30] if you answered yes to 28 and no to 29, I hope you go to jail soon. If you are in jail, stay there.
31] 30 WASN'T really a question, so I'm asking you 2 questions in 31. Are you smarter than the average bear? Are you hairy down there?
32] Is Rene Rosa offensive, disgusting, annoying, and an asshole?
33] Do you realize that you are also disgusting, annoying, and an asshole?
34] Do you wish that you were offensive too? SORRY. You're not offensive, you just have offensive looks, you ugly fuck.
35] THIS IS THE LAST and most important question: Who are you and what have you done with my tuba?
Here it goes.
1] Is English your first language? If not, have you ever worked at a fast food joint?
2] How do you like your steak? If you don't like steak, are you human? If you are human, were you abused as a child? If you weren't abused, did you deserve to be?
3] How many keys do you have on your keychain?
4] How many of those keys have you tried to insert into your urethra?
5] Do you like the taste of someone else's lipstick?
6] Have you ever shit your pants as an adult?
7] Have you ever shit someone ELSE's pants as an adult?
8] Have you ever masturbated in the shower?
9] Have you ever watched someone masturbate in the shower?
10] Have you ever been in the shower after someone masturbated and only knew because there was something that looked like shampoo in the drain but wasn't turning into suds like shampoo should?
12] Are you wondering what happened to number 11?
13] What was the last thing you put in your mouth that wasn't food?
11] Are you now shocked to see that 11 wasn't skipped, it just didn't feel like showing up till now?
14] This is not a question? (just because it has a question mark, doesn't mean it is a valid question) Do you think that this is a question.
15] If you were given a million dollars, would you buy me something?
16] Speaking of which, can I borrow 3 dollars?
17] What is your favorite video game of ALL TIME?
18] If you had a super power that came out of your hair, what would it be?
19] Would you test products on animals if it meant that you or anyone else in the world wouldn't die of AIDS or Cancer? Answer yes. If you answer no, we will still all read it as yes just to give you the benefit of the doubt that you were in fact sane and cared about your loved ones.
20] Would you eat human if it was legal?
21] If you have ever swallowed semen, did that last question kind of make you think for a second "well I've eaten potential humans"?
22] Have you listened to Evil Adam, Cousin, or Ailanthus yet ?
23] If you haven't, what in the name of all that is fuck are you waiting for?
24] Is this enough for you now?
25] Did you wish this survey ended at 24?
26] Did you realize that there is a legal amount of insect parts you can have in all food for humans?
27] Does that make you sad because you wonder if any of your relatives are in people's food, you fucking bottom feeding roach?
28] Do you watch nature shows specifically hoping to see animals having sex?
29] If you said yes to 28, are you currently in jail?
30] if you answered yes to 28 and no to 29, I hope you go to jail soon. If you are in jail, stay there.
31] 30 WASN'T really a question, so I'm asking you 2 questions in 31. Are you smarter than the average bear? Are you hairy down there?
32] Is Rene Rosa offensive, disgusting, annoying, and an asshole?
33] Do you realize that you are also disgusting, annoying, and an asshole?
34] Do you wish that you were offensive too? SORRY. You're not offensive, you just have offensive looks, you ugly fuck.
35] THIS IS THE LAST and most important question: Who are you and what have you done with my tuba?