If you're not now
I must have induldged in the thought "Things couldn't possibly get any worse." today.
Because sure enough...
I guess I'm just sick at being shitty at everything I do.
Shitty Daughter
Shitty Girlfriend
Shitty friend
Shitty teacher
Shitty artist
Shitty Preformer
Shitty human being
Indeed--the ever-present Merde seems to be the only thing that can truly encapsulate my being!
And to think, just when I started to like myself--just when I might have had a glimmer of thinking I was worth something--I am corrected.
I've probably failed the MTEL, I've gained weight, I become less and less attractive by the day while even un-attractive women around me seem to blossom into some bizzare kind of beauty.
I work and I work--I try so fucking hard to do well with something--to please someone--even if it's myself--and I can't even do that.
Even now--typing in stupid courier new in this fucking window some fuckass programmed for a quick buck--how much more pathetic can one get than pouring out one's metaphorical heart into an internet diary.
My anxiety is peaking--and I can scarcely catch a breath.
Because sure enough...
I guess I'm just sick at being shitty at everything I do.
Shitty Daughter
Shitty Girlfriend
Shitty friend
Shitty teacher
Shitty artist
Shitty Preformer
Shitty human being
Indeed--the ever-present Merde seems to be the only thing that can truly encapsulate my being!
And to think, just when I started to like myself--just when I might have had a glimmer of thinking I was worth something--I am corrected.
I've probably failed the MTEL, I've gained weight, I become less and less attractive by the day while even un-attractive women around me seem to blossom into some bizzare kind of beauty.
I work and I work--I try so fucking hard to do well with something--to please someone--even if it's myself--and I can't even do that.
Even now--typing in stupid courier new in this fucking window some fuckass programmed for a quick buck--how much more pathetic can one get than pouring out one's metaphorical heart into an internet diary.
My anxiety is peaking--and I can scarcely catch a breath.