Science, saviors, tragedy?
"So, have you decided to be an agnostic yet?"
"What are you talking about?"
"You don't know. So you're an agnostic."
"No."
"You're too young to decide - to decide something like that. You're an agnostic."
"No, I'm not."
"You're too young to decide."
"What - do you even know what you just said?? Then all Christians under the age of eighteen have to be agnostic because they're too young to be able to decide."
"No."
My mother wins the bronze medal in hypocrisy!
Friday evening, Saturday, and Sunday were all spent at my grandfather's house in the hill country. I took pictures and played with his dogs. I like some of the pictures. I love his dogs. My great-uncle has some kind of problem with his (nonexistent) prostate; everyone's afraid that he's developing cancer again. My great-aunt asked me if I prayed and I lied and she asked me if I had the Holy Ghost yet and I said no and she said I'd get it eventually. No. One of my grandpa's dogs is named Little Shit but his name changes to Tan when we arrive. I thought that was fantastic.
My parents decided to scold Alex for his lack of chivalry (which is not as pressing an issue as his utter lack of regard for anyone other than himself, regardless of sex), so I had to get involved. He's supposed to pull out chairs, open doors, allow women to enter the elevator first? "No way! Men's rights!" I guess Alex is going to be a masculist? I told them that politeness should not be based on a person's gender, because then it is empty and unfair, either elevating one sex above the other or branding the members of one sex incapable of taking care of themselves. Chivalry is dead - with good cause. Equality is undermined when a man lays his coat in a puddle because a human with a vagina is going to get her feet wet. But I digress. I told them that chivalry made no sense because I am a girl who does chivalrous things for other people, and this is against the entire concept, isn't it? Isn't a small, selfless act committed by a female in an attempt to ease the burden of another human being against the entire code? Am I not proof that the old way is dead? My dad told me that that makes me wrong, and I'm very confused - brainwashed - and -- "Why do you have to try to change everything?! Why do you feel the need to destroy the things that have worked for centuries -- the way we've always done things?!" I think that was a particularly low point in his philosophical and idealogical career. But, you know, this is the man who used to tell me that I needed to wear skirts and dresses and embrace the color pink and he was going to burn all of my black clothes because I didn't wear enough color. He tells me not to say "crap" because it's "un-ladylike" (this is when I scream it at him repeatedly). My grandfather told me that the entire feminist movement was a mistake because now women are not respected, and are instead raped and defiled and mistreated by men. (Meaning: Not treated as though they are made of glass.) * Oh, boohoo. Men clearly aren't at fault for hurting women! It's those damn women, trying to get out of the kitchen (where they belong and are safe!), trying to pretend they don't need a man to protect and guide them! It's their fault! They wanted to be considered equal to men, and they deserve to be treated like shit for daring to think they're anything more than domestic robots!
* = Everything past this point is my own bitter sarcasm, and cannot be (directly) attributed to my grandfather.
We stopped by my great-grandma's house on the way home to pick up a cedar chest and her car. My dad yelled and tried to stop me from going into the house (he thought I'd cry or something stupid like that) but I pushed past him. It was strange, seeing her house empty when she's lived there all my life and all of my mother's life. Fifty years. I'd never realized just how small her house was. She told my grandpa that selling her old house is the only thing keeping her alive, basically. He's afraid she's going to give up and waste away once the house is gone for good. She lost most of her muscle tone after being bedridden with pneumonia again and has trouble walking now. But she's eighty-eight.
Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday were spent with my friends! We played at a park, tried to catch fish in my neighborhood's retention pond (it was a sad sight), drove around, went shopping (Target and WalMart. Epic.), tried to buy a fish (couldn't - none of us are 18), and helped Maeghan turn her garage into a bedroom. I met her mother for the first time yesterday. I've only been to her house, oh ... seven times before then. And my mom never even bothered to try to meet them or anything. o_o It was fun. So much fun. We thought someone was trying to climb up the garage door at 4 AM to kill us, so Maeghan got all of her swords out and we snuck around the house and worried. Michael actually jabbed me really hard in the rib with a (blunt) dagger - he thought it was plastic. No, it didn't leave a mark or break the skin. We're having a party tomorrow and I guess we'll watch Borat and act stupid. They want to make straight edge t-shirts. I asked them if they really understood was straight edge was. I don't know.
My dad caught me with The Origin of Species and nearly blew apart like Pangaea.
My mom made three conversion attempts on Sunday and threatened me with a "prayer campaign". She's realized that my stance is unforgivable and I must be won over ASAP because "atheists can only marry other atheists, and then your children will be raised atheist, and I will NOT let you do that to my grandchildren! I've been waiting for your wedding for so many years - I'm not going to let you cheat me out of a beautiful wedding in a church with a white gown!"
She assumes I've never worried about how the fuck I'm going to find someone who will want to marry me when I belong to the most hated and mistrusted minority in America. Thanks, mom. I'd hate to cheat you out of that wedding you've been planning for nearly two decades.
I fucking love this song.
Tell me about something you consider heartbreakingly beautiful.
The sky.
"What are you talking about?"
"You don't know. So you're an agnostic."
"No."
"You're too young to decide - to decide something like that. You're an agnostic."
"No, I'm not."
"You're too young to decide."
"What - do you even know what you just said?? Then all Christians under the age of eighteen have to be agnostic because they're too young to be able to decide."
"No."
My mother wins the bronze medal in hypocrisy!
Friday evening, Saturday, and Sunday were all spent at my grandfather's house in the hill country. I took pictures and played with his dogs. I like some of the pictures. I love his dogs. My great-uncle has some kind of problem with his (nonexistent) prostate; everyone's afraid that he's developing cancer again. My great-aunt asked me if I prayed and I lied and she asked me if I had the Holy Ghost yet and I said no and she said I'd get it eventually. No. One of my grandpa's dogs is named Little Shit but his name changes to Tan when we arrive. I thought that was fantastic.
My parents decided to scold Alex for his lack of chivalry (which is not as pressing an issue as his utter lack of regard for anyone other than himself, regardless of sex), so I had to get involved. He's supposed to pull out chairs, open doors, allow women to enter the elevator first? "No way! Men's rights!" I guess Alex is going to be a masculist? I told them that politeness should not be based on a person's gender, because then it is empty and unfair, either elevating one sex above the other or branding the members of one sex incapable of taking care of themselves. Chivalry is dead - with good cause. Equality is undermined when a man lays his coat in a puddle because a human with a vagina is going to get her feet wet. But I digress. I told them that chivalry made no sense because I am a girl who does chivalrous things for other people, and this is against the entire concept, isn't it? Isn't a small, selfless act committed by a female in an attempt to ease the burden of another human being against the entire code? Am I not proof that the old way is dead? My dad told me that that makes me wrong, and I'm very confused - brainwashed - and -- "Why do you have to try to change everything?! Why do you feel the need to destroy the things that have worked for centuries -- the way we've always done things?!" I think that was a particularly low point in his philosophical and idealogical career. But, you know, this is the man who used to tell me that I needed to wear skirts and dresses and embrace the color pink and he was going to burn all of my black clothes because I didn't wear enough color. He tells me not to say "crap" because it's "un-ladylike" (this is when I scream it at him repeatedly). My grandfather told me that the entire feminist movement was a mistake because now women are not respected, and are instead raped and defiled and mistreated by men. (Meaning: Not treated as though they are made of glass.) * Oh, boohoo. Men clearly aren't at fault for hurting women! It's those damn women, trying to get out of the kitchen (where they belong and are safe!), trying to pretend they don't need a man to protect and guide them! It's their fault! They wanted to be considered equal to men, and they deserve to be treated like shit for daring to think they're anything more than domestic robots!
* = Everything past this point is my own bitter sarcasm, and cannot be (directly) attributed to my grandfather.
We stopped by my great-grandma's house on the way home to pick up a cedar chest and her car. My dad yelled and tried to stop me from going into the house (he thought I'd cry or something stupid like that) but I pushed past him. It was strange, seeing her house empty when she's lived there all my life and all of my mother's life. Fifty years. I'd never realized just how small her house was. She told my grandpa that selling her old house is the only thing keeping her alive, basically. He's afraid she's going to give up and waste away once the house is gone for good. She lost most of her muscle tone after being bedridden with pneumonia again and has trouble walking now. But she's eighty-eight.
Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday were spent with my friends! We played at a park, tried to catch fish in my neighborhood's retention pond (it was a sad sight), drove around, went shopping (Target and WalMart. Epic.), tried to buy a fish (couldn't - none of us are 18), and helped Maeghan turn her garage into a bedroom. I met her mother for the first time yesterday. I've only been to her house, oh ... seven times before then. And my mom never even bothered to try to meet them or anything. o_o It was fun. So much fun. We thought someone was trying to climb up the garage door at 4 AM to kill us, so Maeghan got all of her swords out and we snuck around the house and worried. Michael actually jabbed me really hard in the rib with a (blunt) dagger - he thought it was plastic. No, it didn't leave a mark or break the skin. We're having a party tomorrow and I guess we'll watch Borat and act stupid. They want to make straight edge t-shirts. I asked them if they really understood was straight edge was. I don't know.
My dad caught me with The Origin of Species and nearly blew apart like Pangaea.
My mom made three conversion attempts on Sunday and threatened me with a "prayer campaign". She's realized that my stance is unforgivable and I must be won over ASAP because "atheists can only marry other atheists, and then your children will be raised atheist, and I will NOT let you do that to my grandchildren! I've been waiting for your wedding for so many years - I'm not going to let you cheat me out of a beautiful wedding in a church with a white gown!"
She assumes I've never worried about how the fuck I'm going to find someone who will want to marry me when I belong to the most hated and mistrusted minority in America. Thanks, mom. I'd hate to cheat you out of that wedding you've been planning for nearly two decades.
I fucking love this song.
Tell me about something you consider heartbreakingly beautiful.
The sky.