to fling your arms around a moment, to try to make it stay is an endeavour of hope and loss.

[evenstar6q]

And the fast blood
Hurricanes through me,
And then it rips my roof away
with her fire heads.
This is the longest kiss good night.

Click to view

Breakups bring out the Frightened Rabbit in me. I end up listening to this album on repeat.

I've told C I'll stop writing. He needs space, and I need to work, and the messages are all too emotionally charged for either of us to get any distance. I want it not to be true, I would rather he said it to lash out and hurt me than want to be with her instead of me. I've been here before, haven't I? I should just go, move on, but that doesn't solve the problem of being without him. I hate not being in control. I hate not being the one who leaves. There's that Los Campesinos line I'm thinking of, now. I've taught myself the only way to vaguely get along in love is to like the other slightly less than you get in return. I keep feeling like I'm being undercut.

I will at some point write about Boomtown, maybe when I (can afford to) get my photos developed.