When someone said to me the other day, “Oh, your name is Noelle? You must have been born at Christmas!” (NO), I knew it was about time for me to break out my yearly rant about how much I hate Christmas music. Enjoy my vitriol!
My problem with the Trans-Siberian Orchestra isn't the radio overplay (because I avoid the radio at all times of the year) but the fact that 2/3 of everything on their CDs is NOT rock+traditional Christmas music. If I want to hear snotty children or random vocalists singing random pieces of Christmas music strung together, I can get that pretty much anywhere else. I like the vast bulk of my Christmas music instrumental, or choral, because I'm picky about which versions I'll listen to with individual voices.
I feel that the problem with a vast amount of Christmas music is that most people are not picky, but are so unpicky as to drive the small percentage of people who are totally insane.
It makes me happy not just because it's hilarious, but because nutmeg has long been deserving of some appreciation. Cinnamon is so overrated. I swap nutmeg for cinnamon in half the recipes that call for cinnamon (it makes all the difference in oatmeal cookies). Besides, cinnamon doesn't have any hallucinogenic properties, but nutmeg...
Sadly, all nutmeg reminds me of is the state nickname for Connecticut, where I was born. We got called the "Nutmeg State" because passed off wooden nutmegs as real. Oh, yeah. I'm from the Forgery State.
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I'll just comfort myself with "Nutmeg" from Stephen Colbert's Christmas special. Now that's a song I can get behind.
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No words... Should have brought... A poet
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