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Holy fuck, not going to school anymore has made me not only bored but i dont see anyone anymore. I got bored of joels house where all my friends are constantly. Now dont get me wrong i hella wish i kicked it with all those people still all the time but i just cant stand to be confined to the walls of a smoke filled apartment for hours on end. And that shit has just made hella people hella negative. But then again it is winter time and no matter what i do im gonna be stuck in doors. those guys dont like to leave. The one rare occasions that they leave the apartment into the outside world they just get angry and more sober and they have to go back. It sucks. Its like watching my friends be addicted to heroin but the heroin is just joels house. For the most part though it is my fault i havent been with my friends lately. Im so fucking lazy and have no idea who to call when im bored. ive been out of the loop for a couple weeks so i have no idea who is doing what, whose down to kick it or anything. But i dont know though, i havent gotten a phone call from anyone in practically months. Like who knows, if anyone gave a fuck that i havent been around how come no body has called me in a long ass time. fuck it. Maybe i just dont offer much to anybody, im just boring, just another head to waste space. whatev though eventually im gonna have to do something with my life.