Uuugghh
Let me start by saying that i feel like shit. I feel really, really bad. I had some sort of respritory infection and so my doctor put me on antibiotics and ugh, they make me feel much worse than originally being sick did. I dont feel like doing anything, but i also dont feel like laying in bed anymore. So i'm updating this, which i've been meaning to do for a while, though i'd hoped it'd be with something more worthwhile than this.
I've got henna all over me again. Its kinda pretty, i'd post pictures if i could figure out how. But i'm technologically incompetent (in fact i'm most things incompetent)and dont feel like trying to figure it out right now. I almost wish i hadnt done it though, because i work as a cashier every night, and EVERY single person who comes through my line feels a need to comment. Now, if i was at a restraunt and my cashier girl had henna on her hands, i'd definitely comment. People dont have things like that on themsleves if they dont want attention. However, having to have a conversation about it with every single person when there's a rush doesnt make my managers too happy.
On a completely unrelated topic- college is seeming more and more real. I cant believe summer is more than half way over. Less than a month, and i'll be moving out. MOVING, in fact, for the first time that i can remember unless you count summers away. And i'm feeling really conflicted about going now, because some of the things that i was looking forward to there arent looking so great, and some things have started here that i'm not sure i'm ready to leave just yet. If the past couple weeks have taught me anything, its that (as was said in some movie or something- it stuck in my head) life is a series of missed connections. Things always seem to happen at just the wrong times. Somebody who shall remain nameless said some things to me last night that really hit home. I've always prided myself on not being an addictive person, just because i've never gotten addicted to a substance. Turns out i am, just not in the traditional way. Dammit. (Semi-related: I think i've decided that people's emotional states have very little to do with what objective things are happening to them, and more to do with some sort of internal quotas. Thats an odd way to put it, i guess, and i dont really have the energy to try to explain coherently what i mean right now. Except that i think this might be why we were all so dissappointed by graduation. We thought that our proportional happiness would increase with the scale of the thing that was making us happy, and so we were really surprised that this big, life changing event didnt make us particularly more excited than little day to day things do.)
This has gotten to be way, way too fucking long. I'm very sorry. My pseudo family's in town (not actually aunt, uncle and cousins but my parents oldest friends and their kids, and they actually come visit us, which my real family doesnt, so thats how i think of them) and i'm supposed to be entertaining and cooking dinner and stuff. Grr. Cooking is really not what i want to be doing on my day off. A final mini rant: food service fucking sucks.
I've got henna all over me again. Its kinda pretty, i'd post pictures if i could figure out how. But i'm technologically incompetent (in fact i'm most things incompetent)and dont feel like trying to figure it out right now. I almost wish i hadnt done it though, because i work as a cashier every night, and EVERY single person who comes through my line feels a need to comment. Now, if i was at a restraunt and my cashier girl had henna on her hands, i'd definitely comment. People dont have things like that on themsleves if they dont want attention. However, having to have a conversation about it with every single person when there's a rush doesnt make my managers too happy.
On a completely unrelated topic- college is seeming more and more real. I cant believe summer is more than half way over. Less than a month, and i'll be moving out. MOVING, in fact, for the first time that i can remember unless you count summers away. And i'm feeling really conflicted about going now, because some of the things that i was looking forward to there arent looking so great, and some things have started here that i'm not sure i'm ready to leave just yet. If the past couple weeks have taught me anything, its that (as was said in some movie or something- it stuck in my head) life is a series of missed connections. Things always seem to happen at just the wrong times. Somebody who shall remain nameless said some things to me last night that really hit home. I've always prided myself on not being an addictive person, just because i've never gotten addicted to a substance. Turns out i am, just not in the traditional way. Dammit. (Semi-related: I think i've decided that people's emotional states have very little to do with what objective things are happening to them, and more to do with some sort of internal quotas. Thats an odd way to put it, i guess, and i dont really have the energy to try to explain coherently what i mean right now. Except that i think this might be why we were all so dissappointed by graduation. We thought that our proportional happiness would increase with the scale of the thing that was making us happy, and so we were really surprised that this big, life changing event didnt make us particularly more excited than little day to day things do.)
This has gotten to be way, way too fucking long. I'm very sorry. My pseudo family's in town (not actually aunt, uncle and cousins but my parents oldest friends and their kids, and they actually come visit us, which my real family doesnt, so thats how i think of them) and i'm supposed to be entertaining and cooking dinner and stuff. Grr. Cooking is really not what i want to be doing on my day off. A final mini rant: food service fucking sucks.