Guilt: Redux - 5/17+Epilogue
Title: Guilt: Redux
Fandom: Torchwood
Pairings: Jack/Ianto, references to Ianto/Lisa
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: If I was the one who owned Torchwood, you think I'd admit it now?
Spoilers: Some information and events from s1,2. NONE for s3.
Summary: Ianto knows he should be happy. He has his work and he has Lisa. Again. Finally. He knows he should be happy.
Author's Note: Alternate ending to Guilt - events of Guilt up to around ch50 take place. This picks up many months later... (There's a short recap of 'what you NEED to know from Guilt' before chapter one, if you haven't read it)
Thanks to: My lovely beta cazmalfoy, angelzbabe1989 for idea bouncing, and morbid_sparks for cheerleading even when she doesn't know what happens in this...
Previous chapters at master list
Chapter Five
Lisa was in the kitchen chopping vegetables for their evening meal when Ianto got home that evening. A pack of Weevils had been spotted shortly after he had dropped her at home early that afternoon, and Lisa knew that Ianto had been out rounding them up with the rest of the team for several hours.
He’d sounded shattered when he’d phoned about an hour previously to let her know when he’d be home, and he looked it now.
His exhaustion didn’t, however, apparently preclude him from attempting to take over the dinner preparations as soon as he had taken off his shoes and shucked his coat.
“Here, let me do that. You’ve had a long day.”
“I’m fine, Ianto. And you’re exhausted,” she replied, consciously staying calm.
“I’m not that tired,” Ianto lied, smothering a yawn.
“Hogwash,” Lisa told him. “You’re practically falling asleep on your feet, and don’t try to deny it. I’m perfectly capable of doing a bit of chopping and stirring, Ianto. You don’t need to treat me like an invalid.” Her voice had risen unintentionally as she spoke.
“But you are!” Ianto cried back. “You’re still recovering!”
Lisa got to her feet and stood toe to toe with Ianto. “In case it slipped your notice, Owen said today that I was doing brilliantly. Better than expected even. I’m getting better, I can actually cope with things now, but you don’t seem to realise that!”
Ianto took a step back. “I know you’re getting better, but…”
“But nothing! You say you know that I’m improving, but you’re still treating me like I’m this fragile little thing that will break at the slightest pressure!”
“That’s not true…” Ianto started.
“Oh really?” Lisa was really getting going now; all of the frustration she’d been keeping under tight control for weeks was spilling out. “You do everything for me. I can’t even go to the library by myself. And forget about returning a DVD or going to the shops.”
Ianto was reeling. “I do those things for you because I…”
“It’s not that I don’t appreciate it all,” Lisa interrupted, “because I do. I really do. But I want to be allowed to do things for myself sometimes. I want to know that you believe I can do things for myself again, but when you insist on doing everything for me, it only tells me that you don’t.”
Ianto took a step back. He hadn’t realised at all that Lisa felt like this. Had been feeling like this for weeks, from the sounds of it. “I never meant to make you feel like that. I really didn’t. I just thought I was caring for you.”
“There’s a fine line between caring and smothering,” Lisa retorted. “You’re still wrapping me up in cotton wool, and it’s too much. It’s not even just doing everything for me, you keep agreeing with me.”
“If I have been, then it’s only because…”
“You’re still doing it!” Lisa cried out. “I’m not saying I want us to fight about every little thing, but you never used to have a problem with a bit of friendly bickering! Hell, it was practically a cornerstone of our whole relationship. And now you’ve turned into some sort of… I don’t know… some kind of Stepford Boyfriend or something. Whoever it is, it isn’t you.”
Ianto shook his head. “I didn’t realise. I’m sorry. I’ll try to do better.”
Lisa threw her hands up in despair. “But that’s the whole point! You keep trying to be ‘better’, instead of just letting yourself be who you are! I don’t know if you’re doing it consciously or not, but it seems like you’ve taken it upon yourself to protect me from everything and everyone in the world, no matter that I don’t need it.”
She sighed. “Sometimes I even think you’re trying to protect me from you.”
Ianto spluttered. “That’s ridiculous.”
“Is it? Is it really? If it’s so ridiculous, then why couldn’t you just come out and tell me you were in love with Jack?”
Chapter Six
Comments and concrit (yes, really) are adored. Comments = <3
Fandom: Torchwood
Pairings: Jack/Ianto, references to Ianto/Lisa
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: If I was the one who owned Torchwood, you think I'd admit it now?
Spoilers: Some information and events from s1,2. NONE for s3.
Summary: Ianto knows he should be happy. He has his work and he has Lisa. Again. Finally. He knows he should be happy.
Author's Note: Alternate ending to Guilt - events of Guilt up to around ch50 take place. This picks up many months later... (There's a short recap of 'what you NEED to know from Guilt' before chapter one, if you haven't read it)
Thanks to: My lovely beta cazmalfoy, angelzbabe1989 for idea bouncing, and morbid_sparks for cheerleading even when she doesn't know what happens in this...
Previous chapters at master list
Chapter Five
Lisa was in the kitchen chopping vegetables for their evening meal when Ianto got home that evening. A pack of Weevils had been spotted shortly after he had dropped her at home early that afternoon, and Lisa knew that Ianto had been out rounding them up with the rest of the team for several hours.
He’d sounded shattered when he’d phoned about an hour previously to let her know when he’d be home, and he looked it now.
His exhaustion didn’t, however, apparently preclude him from attempting to take over the dinner preparations as soon as he had taken off his shoes and shucked his coat.
“Here, let me do that. You’ve had a long day.”
“I’m fine, Ianto. And you’re exhausted,” she replied, consciously staying calm.
“I’m not that tired,” Ianto lied, smothering a yawn.
“Hogwash,” Lisa told him. “You’re practically falling asleep on your feet, and don’t try to deny it. I’m perfectly capable of doing a bit of chopping and stirring, Ianto. You don’t need to treat me like an invalid.” Her voice had risen unintentionally as she spoke.
“But you are!” Ianto cried back. “You’re still recovering!”
Lisa got to her feet and stood toe to toe with Ianto. “In case it slipped your notice, Owen said today that I was doing brilliantly. Better than expected even. I’m getting better, I can actually cope with things now, but you don’t seem to realise that!”
Ianto took a step back. “I know you’re getting better, but…”
“But nothing! You say you know that I’m improving, but you’re still treating me like I’m this fragile little thing that will break at the slightest pressure!”
“That’s not true…” Ianto started.
“Oh really?” Lisa was really getting going now; all of the frustration she’d been keeping under tight control for weeks was spilling out. “You do everything for me. I can’t even go to the library by myself. And forget about returning a DVD or going to the shops.”
Ianto was reeling. “I do those things for you because I…”
“It’s not that I don’t appreciate it all,” Lisa interrupted, “because I do. I really do. But I want to be allowed to do things for myself sometimes. I want to know that you believe I can do things for myself again, but when you insist on doing everything for me, it only tells me that you don’t.”
Ianto took a step back. He hadn’t realised at all that Lisa felt like this. Had been feeling like this for weeks, from the sounds of it. “I never meant to make you feel like that. I really didn’t. I just thought I was caring for you.”
“There’s a fine line between caring and smothering,” Lisa retorted. “You’re still wrapping me up in cotton wool, and it’s too much. It’s not even just doing everything for me, you keep agreeing with me.”
“If I have been, then it’s only because…”
“You’re still doing it!” Lisa cried out. “I’m not saying I want us to fight about every little thing, but you never used to have a problem with a bit of friendly bickering! Hell, it was practically a cornerstone of our whole relationship. And now you’ve turned into some sort of… I don’t know… some kind of Stepford Boyfriend or something. Whoever it is, it isn’t you.”
Ianto shook his head. “I didn’t realise. I’m sorry. I’ll try to do better.”
Lisa threw her hands up in despair. “But that’s the whole point! You keep trying to be ‘better’, instead of just letting yourself be who you are! I don’t know if you’re doing it consciously or not, but it seems like you’ve taken it upon yourself to protect me from everything and everyone in the world, no matter that I don’t need it.”
She sighed. “Sometimes I even think you’re trying to protect me from you.”
Ianto spluttered. “That’s ridiculous.”
“Is it? Is it really? If it’s so ridiculous, then why couldn’t you just come out and tell me you were in love with Jack?”
Chapter Six
Comments and concrit (yes, really) are adored. Comments = <3