Comments | eternal_edge: Turn your back

eternal_edge

Turn your back

Jan 22, 2006 22:07

Fandom: Final Fantasy VII
Pairing: Zack/Cloud
Rating: PG

( Turn your back )

Comments 10

aethrin January 23 2006, 04:34:22 UTC

Slinking? I think you mean wan instead of wane? Use a dash instead of a comma after wane; or employ a semi-comma. Cloud wouldn't care, succumbed to the ill fated role of a hero. Poor Cloud.

It's bittersweet. :3

eternal_edge January 23 2006, 04:39:17 UTC

ah, thanks! Fixed it. XD I took your idea of a dash, just put in in another place. ^_^ Yes, poor Cloud; I never write anything happy for him, do I?

aethrin January 23 2006, 04:40:28 UTC

No.

>.> He's doomed to be a weepy little uke.

eternal_edge January 23 2006, 04:40:33 UTC

Oh, and yes, I meant slinking. Kinda like guilty people do when they're trying not to be notices, or scavenger animals. I was trying to go for some sort of symbolism? I think? -.-.;;;

bowl_ofdirt January 23 2006, 05:03:57 UTC

Awww, so sad and so awesome ._.
I really liked the imagrey (sp? 0_o) at the beggining. Super wicked sweet <3

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eternal_edge January 23 2006, 15:28:09 UTC

sure. your e-mail?

eternal_edge January 24 2006, 12:43:53 UTC

thanks! To me, the beginning was the hardest part to write!

llamabitchyo January 23 2006, 15:44:17 UTC

Oh, nicely done! And I love the line about Midgar's corpse.

eternal_edge January 24 2006, 12:45:05 UTC

thanks for reading! As for the dead corpse part...well, I thought that really fit the theme. XD

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eternal_edge January 24 2006, 12:45:39 UTC

yay! ::dances:: the ending was my favorite part. Glad to see someone else really liked it.