"The axe forgets; the tree remembers" - Zimbabwean Proverb
I fear we'll go over time again as I glance at the clock in the corner of my computer screen. We are nearing the end of our allotted class time, and the lecturer has not even begun giving out the homework. I was unable to concentrate past the first hour; any extra time is just wasted at this point. I decide I will finish on time, no matter what and close down my laptop as soon as the clock shows 20:30. I gather my things, step out into the cool night air, and unlock my bicycle. I dream about my dinner on the way back. I only had coffee since breakfast. There's a microwave I could use, but it requires more planning than I can muster on a typical day. I am so spent. Do I have the stamina to buy chicken, vegetables and make a real meal? Or should I give into the temptation to buy a frozen pizza?
I am still weighing my option when I reach the entrance to the park that separates me from the supermarket on the other side. Should I cross through the park? Or take the long way around? I peer down the path that leads into the park. I can see the other street at the end of the path. It is dimly lit, but at least it is lit at all. Someone is walking about halfway down, away from me. I can't see; is that a man or a woman? I stand at the entrance to the park, unsure. Hmm, this person is not very tall. And I think the hips are too wide to be a man's. It does look remarkably like me, wider in the upper body, thinner in the waist, wider in the hips. It has to be a woman. I glide down the path, mapping out the distance I have to cross. I ride in the middle of the lane, repeatedly glancing off into the darkness on either side. There's a group of guys on one side. But I am okay. I am not alone. I reach her and notice the bulbous headphones on her head. She only turns her head when I've caught up with her already. Shit, she would not have been able to help me. Would she even have heard me? And is she able to hear if someone walks up to her? She did not notice me riding up to her.
I turn my bike around and ride back a few metres: "It is none of my business...." I hesitate. "But I noticed that you were wearing headphones. I read that you should not do that because you won't be able to notice what is going on around you." I peter out.
"Actually, I only have it on one ear."
"Oh, that's good because I saw only one side of you, and you didn't seem to notice me until I already passed you. It was me, but it could have been somebody else sneaking up on you, and I grew worried...." I trail off.
"You are right. I pushed one off my ear because I thought maybe I should have at least a general awareness of my surroundings..."
"Oh, I am so glad you did not take it poorly. Because you never know. Someone might see it as criticism and get angry."
"No, thank you for noticing. It makes me feel like someone is watching out for me. I also thought twice about whether I should walk through the park. I live right down there" I know the street she names. "And I fought with myself because I wanted to get home. Do I walk all the way around the park?"
"You know what, I had the same thought. I stood at the edge and looked down the park, trying to figure out whether you were a man or a woman. Isn't it shit that we have to do this every day of our lives? I live right around here; this is my home turf. I know the area, yet I am afraid every day."
"So shit. And at 9 in the evening. It's unfair. Men don't even have to think about this."
While we talk, two women pass us, chatting animatedly. They are together, not alone, and I don't have to worry that much about them.
"Anyways, have a good night, and get home safely!"
"You too. I hope we bump into each other again, some time!"
"Yes, that would be nice."
I begin to ride away. This was a friendly chat. I felt much better than my exhausted self when I left the co-working space where I studied today. Maybe I should... I turn my bicycle around and drive back towards the woman for the second time that night.
"Hey, do you want to exchange phone numbers or emails or something?"
I think I made a new friend.