Friendship is certainly the finest cure for the pangs of disappointed love.
I am not usually a depressed person. Sure, things make me sad or upset and its on my mind for a few days but I don't ever really feel down but today when I woke up I just had this bad feeling. Part of it has to do with the fact that we start classes tomorrow. After a summer of crazy times and having nothing to do but stay out as late as I want and my only concern with what I Was going to drink for the night...I now have to actually go to class plus work 2 jobs. I mean it will be good for me but its gonna be hella hard to adjust to. Goodbye to the incredible social life I had this summer. But I hope that me being busy will keep my mind off the other depressing thing.....
Being single is getting old :( I know I had an entry earlier about how being single was so awesome and it was for a while but now its starting to blow. I am looking in ALL the wrong places to find something. I want that giddy feeling again and I want someone WANTING me so badly that I will jump at the first person that talks to me I swear. Its sad isnt it? It's hard being surround by happy, engaged couples. That seems to be what the majority of my friends are these days. So anyways...Yea after 21 years I still can't figure out the male species. Just when I think I have gone through it all, been played by all the games, someone new has to through something at me! I am torn between remaining the nice person I am that puts in 110% of an effort or playin hard to get and play games with a guy? I swear its a lose lose situation because if I play hard to get I will miss out on meeting plenty of cool people altho I am sure I will also miss out on alot of disappointment. Remaining the way I am and actually going after a guy will probably only lead to more disappointment and depression as well and doesnt seem to be working for me. I know ya all are thinking "stephenie its not that big of a deal, you just havent found a good guy yet and all the ones you have met just arent ment to be" Yes this I know but still...its getting a lil frustrating. I don't understand the point of talking to me, being totally sweet, knowing that you are getting on my good side and that with every flirty thing you say is making me like you more and more and like even hanging out a few times and then all of a sudden just quit and give me some really bad excuse as to why things can't proceed? I mean do guys really just wanna see if they sweet talkin ways will get a girl to like them and then as soon as they realize it worked they loose interest? Apparently so. I just dont know what to do now? I was kinda starting to actually like this person and then I get told an excuse about them being too busy and can't give me what I deserve. WHAT? I never even told him what I wanted from him and never complained about him being busy. All I gotta say is the last time someone used that "busy" thing on me it was cuz he had another girl on the side. And from my past experiences it wouldnt surprise me if thats whats going on here. All I ask is for the truth! Is it really THAT hard for people to tell me whats really going on. Must they sugar coat everything? AHHHHHH So here I sit...played again. Really do I look that stupid? Do people just see me and think hey I bet she is real dumb and won't ever figure out my games. Well sorry guys but I actually got most of them figured out!
Anyways this just turned into a lot of crap...bottom line is, I am frustrated with all the effort I put into things and never get anything in return. I wish I could just say screw it and move on but I never have been good at walking away from things.
Being single is getting old :( I know I had an entry earlier about how being single was so awesome and it was for a while but now its starting to blow. I am looking in ALL the wrong places to find something. I want that giddy feeling again and I want someone WANTING me so badly that I will jump at the first person that talks to me I swear. Its sad isnt it? It's hard being surround by happy, engaged couples. That seems to be what the majority of my friends are these days. So anyways...Yea after 21 years I still can't figure out the male species. Just when I think I have gone through it all, been played by all the games, someone new has to through something at me! I am torn between remaining the nice person I am that puts in 110% of an effort or playin hard to get and play games with a guy? I swear its a lose lose situation because if I play hard to get I will miss out on meeting plenty of cool people altho I am sure I will also miss out on alot of disappointment. Remaining the way I am and actually going after a guy will probably only lead to more disappointment and depression as well and doesnt seem to be working for me. I know ya all are thinking "stephenie its not that big of a deal, you just havent found a good guy yet and all the ones you have met just arent ment to be" Yes this I know but still...its getting a lil frustrating. I don't understand the point of talking to me, being totally sweet, knowing that you are getting on my good side and that with every flirty thing you say is making me like you more and more and like even hanging out a few times and then all of a sudden just quit and give me some really bad excuse as to why things can't proceed? I mean do guys really just wanna see if they sweet talkin ways will get a girl to like them and then as soon as they realize it worked they loose interest? Apparently so. I just dont know what to do now? I was kinda starting to actually like this person and then I get told an excuse about them being too busy and can't give me what I deserve. WHAT? I never even told him what I wanted from him and never complained about him being busy. All I gotta say is the last time someone used that "busy" thing on me it was cuz he had another girl on the side. And from my past experiences it wouldnt surprise me if thats whats going on here. All I ask is for the truth! Is it really THAT hard for people to tell me whats really going on. Must they sugar coat everything? AHHHHHH So here I sit...played again. Really do I look that stupid? Do people just see me and think hey I bet she is real dumb and won't ever figure out my games. Well sorry guys but I actually got most of them figured out!
Anyways this just turned into a lot of crap...bottom line is, I am frustrated with all the effort I put into things and never get anything in return. I wish I could just say screw it and move on but I never have been good at walking away from things.