"What Will It Take To Get You To Follow Through With A Divorce?"
Mom: "What Will It Take To Get You To Follow Through With A Divorce?"
Dad: "Make me an offer"
I'm just afraid at the drastic change of lifestyle. My mom woke me up to tell me this, and said i needed to find a way to pull my own weight. I've been trying mom.
I'm just really afraid with life right now... :(
I need a little angel or something to enter ( Read more... )
Being perfectly honest, yeah, things aren't great at this house. There is still fights, those little "battles", and sometimes those fights that ruin an entire day (and for us, longer since mom hold grudges, and WONT forget them).
You said that you can feel these problems still exist, and... not lying, sure, there's still problems. But i had to go back, re read every entry i left in the past... oh god... half a year (not very many)... just to understand how i felt back then. I am NOT the same matthew that i was when the entries were wrote.
I am not happy with where i am in life. Ideally, i would love to be out of this house. But that wont happen for a while. I've spent a year putting out applications, hounding businesses, calling companies, and cannot seem to even find someone who wants to hire me. This town is so large but not enough "little jobs".. so much that adults run fast food places. Thats my main concern now. But it makes me wonder... my friend's girlfriend works at a taco bell, she said they were short on people, THEN 3 people up and left, leaving them in a bind. Thinking this is a perfect oppurtunity, i visit the place with an application ready in my hand, give it to the manager, and he looks it over and says thank you. I ask about the survey they require you to take and he says "well, uhh, uhh, its not nesessary at this time... we.. we will call you and let you know."
Later, after being pissed that i got turned down.. my friend talked to his girlfriend. She said that they still need the employees, but... she heard from the manager that... as i was told from my friend (trying to say it in a nice way without hurting my feelings).. "he kinda.. discriminated you."
Which makes me wonder how many other places could have turned me down because of my physical condition. Its fast food, not construction. >.>
But anyways.. Mentally.. i am a lot better than where i was half a year ago. I have my friends, i spend time studying, enjoying time with my girlfriend.. i guess the only things in my life that are a bother to me are 1. The small fights that still happen 2. No Job 3. What do i want to do with the rest of my life.
I'm not happy with where i am in life currently (i dont mean like very upset, depressed.. or that sort.).. but i am happy with who i am. I've definately changed alot since this last entry. Now i can't say im 100% fixed, because im not. Periodically, i have days where nothing could go wrong, and i feel flat out depressed and sad with the world. But, as of now, the days of "i cant stand my life... everything goes wrong with me, i cant take it anymore" are gone.
And i can assure you of this. :)
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