(no subject)
Ah. Life. What's new around here? Nothing. Really. Seriously. Nothing.
I have a resaerch paper due that is worth my whole grade, that I have yet to start writing. I think I'm getting sick like no other. And I have a crush on a boy.
Well actually I love the boy.
I don't know. The point is, I'm still alive. Things in my life are okay. I have no suicidal or self-destructive feelings, so I guess that's a good thing. Except when I'm writing music.
I'm trying to put together my demo to send to Charlie becuase I need to get that done sometime this month. Hopefully, sent off by the end of this month. And I don't want to put a bunch of my old garbage on there because that stuff makes me angry. Only because it was ruined when I had to practice it once a week with a whole band and we all made the consecutive decsision that any song played more than 20 times on one day becomes hated. So far that's about every song we played. I'm glad that I dropped out of the praise team though. It caused me so much freaking grief. It just wasn't worth the time, effort and talent that I had been putting into it.
I don't understand it though. It's like normally it doesn't take me very long to write a song. But knowing that some form of my contract could be on the line makes it so difficult because I am being a perfectionsist about everything. Like, I know that it won't be perfect. Plus, I think that I'm just recording it at home. So, even the recording is going to suck ass majorly. But whatever. He said that if I just get him the bare bones of some songs, we can figure out what it is that I'm going to be doing. It's just hard and it's frustrating. But I'm not going to let my life fall apart over it either. Inspiration will hit me when it hits me. And when it does, I'll be ready.
♥
ERIN
I have a resaerch paper due that is worth my whole grade, that I have yet to start writing. I think I'm getting sick like no other. And I have a crush on a boy.
Well actually I love the boy.
I don't know. The point is, I'm still alive. Things in my life are okay. I have no suicidal or self-destructive feelings, so I guess that's a good thing. Except when I'm writing music.
I'm trying to put together my demo to send to Charlie becuase I need to get that done sometime this month. Hopefully, sent off by the end of this month. And I don't want to put a bunch of my old garbage on there because that stuff makes me angry. Only because it was ruined when I had to practice it once a week with a whole band and we all made the consecutive decsision that any song played more than 20 times on one day becomes hated. So far that's about every song we played. I'm glad that I dropped out of the praise team though. It caused me so much freaking grief. It just wasn't worth the time, effort and talent that I had been putting into it.
I don't understand it though. It's like normally it doesn't take me very long to write a song. But knowing that some form of my contract could be on the line makes it so difficult because I am being a perfectionsist about everything. Like, I know that it won't be perfect. Plus, I think that I'm just recording it at home. So, even the recording is going to suck ass majorly. But whatever. He said that if I just get him the bare bones of some songs, we can figure out what it is that I'm going to be doing. It's just hard and it's frustrating. But I'm not going to let my life fall apart over it either. Inspiration will hit me when it hits me. And when it does, I'll be ready.
♥
ERIN