More Profile Snippets -- Yes, people really do post these
Here are some snippets from some of the funnier profiles I've gotten lately:
...I'm looking for someone who is also good hearted without any hidden agendas...someone attractive. I don't have a particular type of female...I'm attracted to many different types of female...its all in the eyes of the beholder. Someone who likes to conversate and is knowledgable about different things and who i may be able to learn a thing or two from as well. ...
Conversate? Ahhh. You must be a Bush. I am not worthy. Moving right along...
I am your knight in shining armor, coming to sate your appetite for the visceral energy and creative force of a man's man.
As we ride off together into the damp morning air on my shining white steed, your bosom heaves to my brawny chest. And you think to yourself how courageous, strong, chivalrous, brave, and tenacious I am in the battles of this world.
Hoof beats sound on the wet grass through the stench of the war laden air; and it occurs to you how lucky I am to have you - better in every way than me. Wiser than me and the architect behind it all.
And I wonder, how can I keep you, my foil, my match, my weakness?
An insatiable kitten in the bedroom, a shrewd operator in the board room, a brilliant strategist, a witty conversationalist, a creative and astute thinker, classically trained violinist, and a drop dead looker with a unique style, you are. You can have your pick.
Still waters run deep, don't they. At home, I'm quiet, observant, considerate, a good listener, and make a good companion. Talkative, playful, affectionate, and fun is how we interact with each other. In those quiet moments you'll find me playing and composing music, reading, as well as gardening/ landscaping. Biography, and newspapers keep me informed about the world.
Have some fun with your reply to this, I would appreciate it!
Good luck finding your libidinous CEO war-games-planning stand-up comic philosopher violinist model girlfriend who is willing to condescend to your level. Seriously, good luck with that. I'd love to have fun with my reply, but unfortunately I'm restricted to only asking you five canned questions by this dating website we are both on. Sorry. Not much fun there. You and Dmitri-the-voicemail-creep can fight over the last perfect woman on Earth -- she's not me. Hats off to you for your inconceivably high standards -- at least I know you have no self-esteem issues. What's that chain for? Oh, I was going to shackle myself to this here pole, because your ego threatens to push me from the galaxy.
All right, in all seriousness I am sure he didn't really mean it the way I'm taking it. I just have this dry jaded humor about reading these frigging things. I laugh a lot more than I perk up and care to know more.
spiritual /fun-loving/ passionate/ soulful
i am a grounded i think reasonably intellengent fun person to be with Iiam also looking for the same in a woman but she should have a few differences she should be attractive and fun reasonably smart she should be caring loving and someone i would want to spend alot of time with i am also continuing my education in computers so i can advance to a better career in the near future i love the arts and just about all types of music i play guitar and teach guitar so yes music is important to me
Want to buy: punctuation, capitals, and spell-check.
I think at this point, the dating sites are sending me joke profiles just to see what I write about it. Seriously. If you know you suck at English, use Word and spell-check. Please? I feel like I'm reading a paragraph-long catlol sometimes! *strangles self*
...I'm looking for someone who is also good hearted without any hidden agendas...someone attractive. I don't have a particular type of female...I'm attracted to many different types of female...its all in the eyes of the beholder. Someone who likes to conversate and is knowledgable about different things and who i may be able to learn a thing or two from as well. ...
Conversate? Ahhh. You must be a Bush. I am not worthy. Moving right along...
I am your knight in shining armor, coming to sate your appetite for the visceral energy and creative force of a man's man.
As we ride off together into the damp morning air on my shining white steed, your bosom heaves to my brawny chest. And you think to yourself how courageous, strong, chivalrous, brave, and tenacious I am in the battles of this world.
Hoof beats sound on the wet grass through the stench of the war laden air; and it occurs to you how lucky I am to have you - better in every way than me. Wiser than me and the architect behind it all.
And I wonder, how can I keep you, my foil, my match, my weakness?
An insatiable kitten in the bedroom, a shrewd operator in the board room, a brilliant strategist, a witty conversationalist, a creative and astute thinker, classically trained violinist, and a drop dead looker with a unique style, you are. You can have your pick.
Still waters run deep, don't they. At home, I'm quiet, observant, considerate, a good listener, and make a good companion. Talkative, playful, affectionate, and fun is how we interact with each other. In those quiet moments you'll find me playing and composing music, reading, as well as gardening/ landscaping. Biography, and newspapers keep me informed about the world.
Have some fun with your reply to this, I would appreciate it!
Good luck finding your libidinous CEO war-games-planning stand-up comic philosopher violinist model girlfriend who is willing to condescend to your level. Seriously, good luck with that. I'd love to have fun with my reply, but unfortunately I'm restricted to only asking you five canned questions by this dating website we are both on. Sorry. Not much fun there. You and Dmitri-the-voicemail-creep can fight over the last perfect woman on Earth -- she's not me. Hats off to you for your inconceivably high standards -- at least I know you have no self-esteem issues. What's that chain for? Oh, I was going to shackle myself to this here pole, because your ego threatens to push me from the galaxy.
All right, in all seriousness I am sure he didn't really mean it the way I'm taking it. I just have this dry jaded humor about reading these frigging things. I laugh a lot more than I perk up and care to know more.
spiritual /fun-loving/ passionate/ soulful
i am a grounded i think reasonably intellengent fun person to be with Iiam also looking for the same in a woman but she should have a few differences she should be attractive and fun reasonably smart she should be caring loving and someone i would want to spend alot of time with i am also continuing my education in computers so i can advance to a better career in the near future i love the arts and just about all types of music i play guitar and teach guitar so yes music is important to me
Want to buy: punctuation, capitals, and spell-check.
I think at this point, the dating sites are sending me joke profiles just to see what I write about it. Seriously. If you know you suck at English, use Word and spell-check. Please? I feel like I'm reading a paragraph-long catlol sometimes! *strangles self*