A few pondered thoughts as I walked through winter wonderland....

[enoughaboutme]

i just got home from my last 8 am ever in my life and i stumbled upon some thoughts as i was dragging my ass home in the 6 inches of snow.. or however many there might be. I pretty much pulled an all nighter to study for my final today, and inbetween had some home made cookies and hot chocolate with one of my best guy friends here at school. It's weird how there are a very few amount of people that you can have a genuinely intersting and valuable conversation with now a days. Someone thqat you can truley connect with, and no matter what, know that you'll get an hoest opinion from. He's one of those people to me I think, although we are not the kind of friends that see or talk to eachother everyday even though we do live in the same building, but when we do talk, especially when him and i just talk, sometimes i would never want to be anywhere else. Not that I have feelings for this person, just the mere fact of knowing that there is someone out there that shares a lot of the same thoughts ideas and opinions, and expresses them in the same way that I do. But those aren't the thoughts I was speaking of. I was thinking about how a lot of relationships aren't very honest. I have a lot of girl friends who lie to their boyfriends and tell them that they're studying or watching a movie when theyre really out at a bar with their friends... and I judt don't get it. I have guy friends who hide the fact that they have made mistakes, and never want their girlfriends to know. but why? Maybe it's just me. I think after beingin a relationship where I felt like I knew less important things then non important ones, I think I became the kind of person that would want to know evverything, and that would keep nothing, even if it killed me. If someone cheated on me, I'd like to know. wouldnt you? I mean hell, if you choose to be with another person while being in a relationship with me, then fuck you, you obviously don't want to be with me enough. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely respect and adore people that can have a successful relationship after one has been cheated on, it means a lot that first off the person told the other, and second off that the second person was willing to forgive the first person.. I just hope that months later they don't sit there and regret and realize that they never really did forgive them, at least that's what I did. And I'm so sick of hearing about all this sex bull shit, it's been so long and this and that, who the hell cares, suck it up, no one ever died of sex underdose. Is it really that important to you that you're willing to lose what you've been fighting for this entire time? If so, then it probably isn't even worth it, the fight I mean. And if you can't be honest with your significant other, then why do you expect them to be honest with you? I just don't understand why people settle to be in these relationships where they have to lie to their boyfriend or girlfriend constantly in order to prevent conflict. I know that if I was ever dating someone and they weren't happy when I was out witrh my friends, or had good guy friends, or wanted to spend a lot fo time with my family... It definately wouldn't last very long, and definately would not lie to them about what I was doing just to make them feel happy while the whole time pretending that I was someone that I'm not. I guess the whole point of my entry is... Why can't everyone be honest and respect the fact that people have lives outside of yours and his relationship? Why base your relationship on a lie to convince your partner that you are someone that you are not? Stop lying people... Becasue honetly when is enough........ enough?

/Is it still me that makes you sweat?/Am I who you think about in bed?/When the lights are dim and your hands are shaking as you're sliding off your dress? /Then think of what you did/And how I hope to God he was worth it./When the lights are dim and your heart is racing as you're fingers touch your skin./I've got more wit, a better kiss, a hotter touch, a better fuck/Than any boy you'll ever meet, sweetie you had me/Girl I was it look past the sweat, a better love deserving of/Exchanging body heat in the passenger seat?/No, no, no you know it will always just be, me/Let's get these teen hearts beating. Faster, faster/So testosterone boys and harlequin girls/Will you dance to this beat, and hold a lover close?/So testosterone boys and harlequin girls/Will you dance to this beat, and hold a lover close?/So I guess we're back to us, oh cameraman, swing the focus/In case I lost my train of thought, where was it that we last left off?/Oh now I do recall, we just were getting to the part/Where the shock sets in, and the stomach acid finds a new way to make you get sick./I hope you didn't expect that you'd get all of the attention./Now let's not get selfish/Did you really think I’d let you kill this chorus?/Let's get these teen hearts beating. Faster, faster/So testosterone boys and harlequin girls/Will you dance to this beat, and hold a lover close?/So testosterone boys and harlequin girls/Will you dance to this beat, and hold a lover close?/Dance to this beat/Dance to this beat/Dance to this beat/Let's get these teen hearts beating. Faster, faster/Let's get these teen hearts beating. Faster/I've got more wit, a better kiss, a hotter touch, a better fuck /Than any boy you'll ever meet, sweetie you had me/Girl I was it look past the sweat, a better love deserving of/Exchanging body heat in the passenger seat?/No, no, no you know it will always just be, me/Let's get these teen hearts beating. Faster, faster/So testosterone boys and harlequin girls/Will you dance to this beat, and hold a lover close?/So testosterone boys and harlequin girls/Will you dance to this beat, and hold a lover close?/So testosterone boys and harlequin girls/Dance to this beat/So testosterone boys and harlequin girls/Dance to this beat/And hold a lover close/Let's get these teen hearts beating. Faster, faster/Let's get these teen hearts beating. Faster/