congratulations, i guess youre ALWAYS right
after what seems to be the most random/unfortunate/interesting weekend in a while..i seem to be completely lost. people are changing and so am i.
i wanna give to you, give to you..more than a love song can give, more than a feeling like this ...
-random song keeps jumping into my head and i love it. :)
anyways, ive been a complete bitch for the past few days and i know it..i apologize. i cant help it that my perfect world is once again, not so perfect. i was having a reasonably good week and then...BOOM! friday made everything bad. bad news on top of more bad stuff. yeah i had fun doing random shit but i still had that one thing lurking in the basement of my mind.
it kills me that the few people i need to talk to, i cant. i feel as though everyone that realllly matters to me is upset with me and yeah, i know why..but some people im just confused about. moreover, people i havent REALLY talked to in months are suddenly coming into my life and really hearing me..finally hearing me. and i guess, im finally listening too. and it scares me..A LOT. i dont want to be trapped in another maze i cant get out of. fuck shit fuck fuck shit. im doing it again.
....you can never go back..welcome to my california, eventhough im no good for you, but tell me cuz i wanna find out, do you still feel alone??
well i guess its time for some psych reading and then to Everything is Illuminated (im FINALLY reading it)..its not like anyones keeping me busy..
i wanna give to you, give to you..more than a love song can give, more than a feeling like this ...
-random song keeps jumping into my head and i love it. :)
anyways, ive been a complete bitch for the past few days and i know it..i apologize. i cant help it that my perfect world is once again, not so perfect. i was having a reasonably good week and then...BOOM! friday made everything bad. bad news on top of more bad stuff. yeah i had fun doing random shit but i still had that one thing lurking in the basement of my mind.
it kills me that the few people i need to talk to, i cant. i feel as though everyone that realllly matters to me is upset with me and yeah, i know why..but some people im just confused about. moreover, people i havent REALLY talked to in months are suddenly coming into my life and really hearing me..finally hearing me. and i guess, im finally listening too. and it scares me..A LOT. i dont want to be trapped in another maze i cant get out of. fuck shit fuck fuck shit. im doing it again.
....you can never go back..welcome to my california, eventhough im no good for you, but tell me cuz i wanna find out, do you still feel alone??
well i guess its time for some psych reading and then to Everything is Illuminated (im FINALLY reading it)..its not like anyones keeping me busy..