The Turnip Lady
The ever delightful elektrobard was given a writing challenge. It's called the Turnip Princess Challenge, and the challenge is to rewrite a newly discovered fairy tale in the writer's own style. The full details are on his wordpress, which is well worth checking out for the non vegetable-royalty stories as well.
I wasn't going to resist a thing like that, was I?
The years were heavy in the woods. Not on the trees, which blossomed and leafed and fruited and fell in their endless rounds, but on the Woman of the Woods.
A little talent, a little heartbreak, and a little solitude had hardened her, like a tree root hidden too long under the rock. So when the Woman of the Woods took her talent and used it to summon a man of wealth, youth and charm, it was with no particular charity in her heart that she then saw the squire's eldest lad blunder into her cave, and find his mind unable to imagine how he might leave it. She watched with a kind of thin satisfaction as he stumbled around, and then fetched the beast she kept in the shed outside, and went to meet her new pet.
On seeing the fearsome Woman of the Woods, the lad sighed and sat down on a rock. "Fair lady, might I keep yourself and your...bear thing there company for the day? I seem to be trapped in this cave for now. Though at least that gives me the pleasure of looking upon you for longer."
"Watch that silver tongue of yours there, or I really will turn it to metal." The Woman of the Woods laid out a loaf of dark bread and a pot of wine, and a sheepskin, which the lad accepted with a gracious smile.
"Since stay you must, stay you shall." She took a basket that was hanging from a bent nail in the wall. "Make yourself useful and watch the beast. I'll be fetching in the vegetables."
The lad and the beast maintained an awkward silence until the Woman of the Woods was safely out of earshot. "Sorry about that," rumbled the beast. "She's somewhat suspicious of young men. My fault, I fear."
The lad gawped. "You can speak, sir bear?"
"Why should- oh, the glamour." The beast sighed. "If ever you touched iron, you'd be able to see my natural form."
The prince looked around for something iron, but the Woman of the Woods had been thorough removing all iron in the cave, except for the bent nail in the wall. Carefully he pressed one finger to it, and looked upon the beast- who was now a perfectly normal man of coppery beard.
The man smiled ruefully. "I know, I know. When I cast her over for a prettier girl, she declared that I should be as hideous as she, and threw this glamour over me. Now the gentle flee from me, and hunters drop their bows in fright."
The lad frowned, confused. "But she's not hideous. She'd be as fair as a sunrise if she'd only smile."
"You'll never convince her of that," sighed the bearded man. "Look, take the nail with you, her talent can't touch iron. She'll be back soon, she's tending the turnips, so run now while you can."
The squire's eldest lad gave this some thought, and thanking the bearded man went out of the cave- and went straight to the turnip field.
"It's a funny thing about turnips," he said by way of greeting.
"Get out! Go away!" The Woman of the Woods pulled the shadow of the trees around her, and cast herself the glamour of a terrifying monster.
The lad stood unperturbed. "You look at them in the field, and you think they're just leafy green things."
"Get out! Go away!" The Woman of the Woods called the sharpness of the thorns of the woods, so that the squire's eldest lad hurt until he thought he would bleed at just the sensation.
"But it's just another sort of glamour, isn't it?" continued the lad. "The goodness of the turnip is hidden underneath, where ignorant men won't see it."
"Get out! Go away!" The Woman of the Woods called upon the turnips themselves, and they stirred a little in their rows, started screaming nonsense at the lad and trying to drown out his voice.
"So the question is this." The lad said softly, under the screaming. "Would the woman who hides her heart under her talent, her hard work and her determination, would that woman consent to be my turnip lady?"
The Woman of the Woods stared at him in astonishment, and then dropped all her glamour (and in a cave nearby, a beast stretched out limbs that were suddenly those of a man, and sighed happily). Wordlessly, she walked over to the lad and held out her hand, and he placed the bent nail on to her palm. She whispered to it until it glowed red hot, then bent it in her bare hands until it was the shape of a finger ring.
"And strong," added the lad hastily. "Did I mention strong?"
The Woman smiled, and it was really very much like a sunrise. "I've a feeling you were about to. So mine is the face you'd have beside you?"
"Though terror, pain and cacophony follow behind," he admitted.
She slipped the ring on to his finger. "Oh, I don't think they'll be necessary."
THE END.
I wasn't going to resist a thing like that, was I?
The years were heavy in the woods. Not on the trees, which blossomed and leafed and fruited and fell in their endless rounds, but on the Woman of the Woods.
A little talent, a little heartbreak, and a little solitude had hardened her, like a tree root hidden too long under the rock. So when the Woman of the Woods took her talent and used it to summon a man of wealth, youth and charm, it was with no particular charity in her heart that she then saw the squire's eldest lad blunder into her cave, and find his mind unable to imagine how he might leave it. She watched with a kind of thin satisfaction as he stumbled around, and then fetched the beast she kept in the shed outside, and went to meet her new pet.
On seeing the fearsome Woman of the Woods, the lad sighed and sat down on a rock. "Fair lady, might I keep yourself and your...bear thing there company for the day? I seem to be trapped in this cave for now. Though at least that gives me the pleasure of looking upon you for longer."
"Watch that silver tongue of yours there, or I really will turn it to metal." The Woman of the Woods laid out a loaf of dark bread and a pot of wine, and a sheepskin, which the lad accepted with a gracious smile.
"Since stay you must, stay you shall." She took a basket that was hanging from a bent nail in the wall. "Make yourself useful and watch the beast. I'll be fetching in the vegetables."
The lad and the beast maintained an awkward silence until the Woman of the Woods was safely out of earshot. "Sorry about that," rumbled the beast. "She's somewhat suspicious of young men. My fault, I fear."
The lad gawped. "You can speak, sir bear?"
"Why should- oh, the glamour." The beast sighed. "If ever you touched iron, you'd be able to see my natural form."
The prince looked around for something iron, but the Woman of the Woods had been thorough removing all iron in the cave, except for the bent nail in the wall. Carefully he pressed one finger to it, and looked upon the beast- who was now a perfectly normal man of coppery beard.
The man smiled ruefully. "I know, I know. When I cast her over for a prettier girl, she declared that I should be as hideous as she, and threw this glamour over me. Now the gentle flee from me, and hunters drop their bows in fright."
The lad frowned, confused. "But she's not hideous. She'd be as fair as a sunrise if she'd only smile."
"You'll never convince her of that," sighed the bearded man. "Look, take the nail with you, her talent can't touch iron. She'll be back soon, she's tending the turnips, so run now while you can."
The squire's eldest lad gave this some thought, and thanking the bearded man went out of the cave- and went straight to the turnip field.
"It's a funny thing about turnips," he said by way of greeting.
"Get out! Go away!" The Woman of the Woods pulled the shadow of the trees around her, and cast herself the glamour of a terrifying monster.
The lad stood unperturbed. "You look at them in the field, and you think they're just leafy green things."
"Get out! Go away!" The Woman of the Woods called the sharpness of the thorns of the woods, so that the squire's eldest lad hurt until he thought he would bleed at just the sensation.
"But it's just another sort of glamour, isn't it?" continued the lad. "The goodness of the turnip is hidden underneath, where ignorant men won't see it."
"Get out! Go away!" The Woman of the Woods called upon the turnips themselves, and they stirred a little in their rows, started screaming nonsense at the lad and trying to drown out his voice.
"So the question is this." The lad said softly, under the screaming. "Would the woman who hides her heart under her talent, her hard work and her determination, would that woman consent to be my turnip lady?"
The Woman of the Woods stared at him in astonishment, and then dropped all her glamour (and in a cave nearby, a beast stretched out limbs that were suddenly those of a man, and sighed happily). Wordlessly, she walked over to the lad and held out her hand, and he placed the bent nail on to her palm. She whispered to it until it glowed red hot, then bent it in her bare hands until it was the shape of a finger ring.
"And strong," added the lad hastily. "Did I mention strong?"
The Woman smiled, and it was really very much like a sunrise. "I've a feeling you were about to. So mine is the face you'd have beside you?"
"Though terror, pain and cacophony follow behind," he admitted.
She slipped the ring on to his finger. "Oh, I don't think they'll be necessary."
THE END.