Fanmix: Had a complicated childhood (2/3): River Tam (Disk 1)
Fandom: Firefly/Serenity
Subject: River Tam
Title: Had a complicated childhood
Notes: "Had a complicated..." started as a Simon fanmix for the winner of my posting on livelongnmarry last summer, but as I searched for songs River poked her pretty little head out. The girl grabbed a much longer list of songs to choose from and I swore I'd do a two-disk set for the Tams. What ended up happening was that River got two disks and bonus tracks. I already had weeded through a lot of material and still I ended up with a ridiculous amount of songs!
Disk 1:
*R.E.M. - The Wrong Child I will try to sing a happy song / I'll try and make a happy game to play / Come play with me I whispered to my new found friend / Tell me what it's like to go outside
River: I took you away from there. I know I did. You don't think I do, but... I get confused. I remember everything. I remember too much, and... some of it's made up, and... some of it can't be quantified, and... there's secrets. But I understand. You gave up everything you had to find me. And you found me broken. It's hard for you. You gave up everything you had.
*Natalie Merchant - Wonder People see me / I'm a challenge to your balance / I'm over your heads / How I confound you and astound you
Simon: River was more than gifted. She...she was a gift. Everything she did, music, math, theoretical physics -- even-even dance -- there was nothing that didn't come as naturally to her as breathing does to us.
*Linkin Park - KRWLNG Discomfort, endlessly has pulled itself upon me, / Distracting, Reacting. / Against my will, I stand beside my own reflection, / It's haunting how I can't seem to find myself again. / My walls are closing in.
River: It's okay, Early. I'm going with you. ...Don't belong. Dangerous, like you. can't be controlled. Can't be trusted. Everyone could just go on without me and not have to worry. People could be what they wanted to be. Could be with the people they wanted. Live simple. No secrets. ...I'll be fine. I'll be your bounty, Jubal Early. And I'll just fade away.
*Merril Bainbridge - State of Mind I feel it / Pounding like a drum inside my brain / I feel it / If it doesn't stop I'll go insane
River: Won't stop. Won't ever stop. They'll just keep coming until they get back what you took.
*Matchbox Twenty - Unwell I've been talking in my sleep / Pretty soon they'll come to get me / Yeah, they're taking me away
You need the MP3 linked here b/c the one in the zip unfortunately skips, don't know why.
River: Two by two. Hands of blue.
*Counting Crows - Perfect Blue Buildings It's 4:30 A.M. on a Tuesday. / It doesn't get much worse than this. / In beds in little rooms in buildings in the middle / of these lives which are completely meaningless, / help me stay awake, I'm fallin'...
River: It isn't mine. The memory, it isn't mine. And I shouldn't have to carry it. It isn't mine. Don't make me sleep again.
Simon: I won't. I won't.
River: Put a bullet to me. Bullet in the brain pan. Squish.
*Placebo - Meds I was alone, / Staring over the ledge, / Trying my best not to forget / All manner of joy / All manner of glee / And our one heroic pledge
River: He looks better in red.
*Eels - Checkout Blues Things won't get better / Until they get much worse / Am I stronger than the curse
Mal: Subliminal. It's a subliminal message, broadwaved to trigger her.
Mr. Universe: I've been seeing this code pop up all over, the last few weeks. It's Alliance, and it's high military. They have gone to enormous trouble to find your little friend... and found her they have. Do you all know what it is you're carrying?
*Dar Williams - Comfortably Numb There is no pain you are receding / A distant ship's smoke on the horizon. / You are only coming through in waves. / Your lips move but I can't hear what you're saying.
River: No! No, I don't wanna go back to the... It's not okay! You can't just dig into me, shove twenty needles in my eyes and ask me what I see!
*Postal Service / Death Cab for Cutie - This Place is a Prison I know there's a big world out there like the one I saw on the screen / In my living room late last night, / It was almost too bright to see
River: Little soul, big world. Eat, sleep, and eat. Many souls.
Mal: Cattle on the ship three weeks, she don't go near 'em. Suddenly we're on Jianying, and she's got a driving need to commune with the beasts?
River: They weren't cows inside. They were waiting to be, but they forgot. Now they see sky, and they remember what they are.
*Tracy Chapman - I Used to Be a Sailor I don't like being stationary / I like the rocky wavy motions of the sea / I sit and rot behind these padded walls / Hoping one day they'll fall / And set me free
River: But, I understand. You gave up everything you had to find me. You found me broken. It's hard for you. You gave up everything you had.
Simon: Mei-mei, everything I have is right here.
*Kimya Dawson - Rocks With Holes running in circles is running around / back and forth motion ain't traveling / sinking infinitely into the sound / while everyone she knows is sleeping
River: They're everywhere. Every city, every... every house, every room; they're all inside me! I can hear them all and they're saying... NOTHING! GET UP! Please, get up!
*Simon & Garfunkel - Sound of Silence "Fools" said I, "You do not know / Silence like a cancer grows. / Hear my words that I might teach you, / Take my arms that I might reach to you." / But my words like silent raindrops fell, / And echoed / In the wells of silence
River: These are the ones that take you! Little ones in the corner that you almost don't see. But they're the ones that reach in and do it. They're the ones with teeth and you have to smash them!
*The Cranberries - Zombie They’re still fightin’! / With their tanks, and their bombs / And their bombs, and their guns / In your head, in your head! / They are dyin’!
River: Show me off like a dog, old men covered in blood, it never touched them but they're drowning in it... so much loss... I don't know what I'm saying. I never know what I'm saying...
*Sara Hickman - Mad World Children waiting for the day they feel good / Happy birthday / And I feel the way that every child should / Sit and listen
River: Put a bullet to me. Bullet in the brain pan. Squish.
Simon: Don't say that! Not ever. We'll get through this.
River: Things are going to get much, much worse.
*Blonde Redhead - For the Damaged Coda
River: No power in the verse can stop me.
Download Disk 1 from Sendspace (86 MB) All 16 songs MP3 format, artwork, and track listing for both disks
Please download the track "Unwell" here. The original file in the zip skips. I'm having issues with skipping tracks when I prepare fsts. Sorry.
(Bonus tracks in next post)
Subject: River Tam
Title: Had a complicated childhood
Notes: "Had a complicated..." started as a Simon fanmix for the winner of my posting on livelongnmarry last summer, but as I searched for songs River poked her pretty little head out. The girl grabbed a much longer list of songs to choose from and I swore I'd do a two-disk set for the Tams. What ended up happening was that River got two disks and bonus tracks. I already had weeded through a lot of material and still I ended up with a ridiculous amount of songs!
Disk 1:
*R.E.M. - The Wrong Child I will try to sing a happy song / I'll try and make a happy game to play / Come play with me I whispered to my new found friend / Tell me what it's like to go outside
River: I took you away from there. I know I did. You don't think I do, but... I get confused. I remember everything. I remember too much, and... some of it's made up, and... some of it can't be quantified, and... there's secrets. But I understand. You gave up everything you had to find me. And you found me broken. It's hard for you. You gave up everything you had.
*Natalie Merchant - Wonder People see me / I'm a challenge to your balance / I'm over your heads / How I confound you and astound you
Simon: River was more than gifted. She...she was a gift. Everything she did, music, math, theoretical physics -- even-even dance -- there was nothing that didn't come as naturally to her as breathing does to us.
*Linkin Park - KRWLNG Discomfort, endlessly has pulled itself upon me, / Distracting, Reacting. / Against my will, I stand beside my own reflection, / It's haunting how I can't seem to find myself again. / My walls are closing in.
River: It's okay, Early. I'm going with you. ...Don't belong. Dangerous, like you. can't be controlled. Can't be trusted. Everyone could just go on without me and not have to worry. People could be what they wanted to be. Could be with the people they wanted. Live simple. No secrets. ...I'll be fine. I'll be your bounty, Jubal Early. And I'll just fade away.
*Merril Bainbridge - State of Mind I feel it / Pounding like a drum inside my brain / I feel it / If it doesn't stop I'll go insane
River: Won't stop. Won't ever stop. They'll just keep coming until they get back what you took.
*Matchbox Twenty - Unwell I've been talking in my sleep / Pretty soon they'll come to get me / Yeah, they're taking me away
You need the MP3 linked here b/c the one in the zip unfortunately skips, don't know why.
River: Two by two. Hands of blue.
*Counting Crows - Perfect Blue Buildings It's 4:30 A.M. on a Tuesday. / It doesn't get much worse than this. / In beds in little rooms in buildings in the middle / of these lives which are completely meaningless, / help me stay awake, I'm fallin'...
River: It isn't mine. The memory, it isn't mine. And I shouldn't have to carry it. It isn't mine. Don't make me sleep again.
Simon: I won't. I won't.
River: Put a bullet to me. Bullet in the brain pan. Squish.
*Placebo - Meds I was alone, / Staring over the ledge, / Trying my best not to forget / All manner of joy / All manner of glee / And our one heroic pledge
River: He looks better in red.
*Eels - Checkout Blues Things won't get better / Until they get much worse / Am I stronger than the curse
Mal: Subliminal. It's a subliminal message, broadwaved to trigger her.
Mr. Universe: I've been seeing this code pop up all over, the last few weeks. It's Alliance, and it's high military. They have gone to enormous trouble to find your little friend... and found her they have. Do you all know what it is you're carrying?
*Dar Williams - Comfortably Numb There is no pain you are receding / A distant ship's smoke on the horizon. / You are only coming through in waves. / Your lips move but I can't hear what you're saying.
River: No! No, I don't wanna go back to the... It's not okay! You can't just dig into me, shove twenty needles in my eyes and ask me what I see!
*Postal Service / Death Cab for Cutie - This Place is a Prison I know there's a big world out there like the one I saw on the screen / In my living room late last night, / It was almost too bright to see
River: Little soul, big world. Eat, sleep, and eat. Many souls.
Mal: Cattle on the ship three weeks, she don't go near 'em. Suddenly we're on Jianying, and she's got a driving need to commune with the beasts?
River: They weren't cows inside. They were waiting to be, but they forgot. Now they see sky, and they remember what they are.
*Tracy Chapman - I Used to Be a Sailor I don't like being stationary / I like the rocky wavy motions of the sea / I sit and rot behind these padded walls / Hoping one day they'll fall / And set me free
River: But, I understand. You gave up everything you had to find me. You found me broken. It's hard for you. You gave up everything you had.
Simon: Mei-mei, everything I have is right here.
*Kimya Dawson - Rocks With Holes running in circles is running around / back and forth motion ain't traveling / sinking infinitely into the sound / while everyone she knows is sleeping
River: They're everywhere. Every city, every... every house, every room; they're all inside me! I can hear them all and they're saying... NOTHING! GET UP! Please, get up!
*Simon & Garfunkel - Sound of Silence "Fools" said I, "You do not know / Silence like a cancer grows. / Hear my words that I might teach you, / Take my arms that I might reach to you." / But my words like silent raindrops fell, / And echoed / In the wells of silence
River: These are the ones that take you! Little ones in the corner that you almost don't see. But they're the ones that reach in and do it. They're the ones with teeth and you have to smash them!
*The Cranberries - Zombie They’re still fightin’! / With their tanks, and their bombs / And their bombs, and their guns / In your head, in your head! / They are dyin’!
River: Show me off like a dog, old men covered in blood, it never touched them but they're drowning in it... so much loss... I don't know what I'm saying. I never know what I'm saying...
*Sara Hickman - Mad World Children waiting for the day they feel good / Happy birthday / And I feel the way that every child should / Sit and listen
River: Put a bullet to me. Bullet in the brain pan. Squish.
Simon: Don't say that! Not ever. We'll get through this.
River: Things are going to get much, much worse.
*Blonde Redhead - For the Damaged Coda
River: No power in the verse can stop me.
Download Disk 1 from Sendspace (86 MB) All 16 songs MP3 format, artwork, and track listing for both disks
Please download the track "Unwell" here. The original file in the zip skips. I'm having issues with skipping tracks when I prepare fsts. Sorry.
(Bonus tracks in next post)