still alone
so i still live my life day through day thinking that i need someone in my life, someone i can share my thoughts with, it really sucks having someone for so long, and then having noone... i could still talk to Chrissy about thoughts, but she doesn't want to hear about some of the things i'm thinking of, because some of it is about her... and i just would like to be friends with her and NOTHING more. I just hate how hard it is to find someone, you know I consider myself a pretty good guy, I just hate girls, they're all different, and they're all so hard to fucking understand. I have been shot down at least 5 times by 5 different females in the past month. I'm obviously doing something wrong. and then the one tiome i didn't get turned down, she was a slut, and I really am ashamed of myself for that... but yeah i really realy don't want to talk aobut that, but its better to just elt it out instead of holding it in so i'm more or less babbling. i just want a girl to hang out with, to laugh and have a good time, nothign more, I don't even know if i want a relationship at the moment, it would depend on who it was and how they are. It's always been so much easier to relater to girls than guys(i'm seriously not gay) I just think that because we think on opposite wavelengths that we connect easier, meh whatever i'm going to fucking bed i hate the midnight shift at work.