what the fuck is wrong with me?
gah! so the last few days have been really stressfull and stuff. i accedentally turned the power off on my surge protector. so i have to reset everything. no fun. i hope kris comes over to give me my back rub. i've found that he's my best friend on my psuedo staff. i feel really torn right now. and in many different directions. part of me is so wanting to stay right where i am and devout tons of time to my job, part of my really misses peices of home, part of me misses pieces of last year. i'm not gonna induldge bc it's an internal struggle that i need to resolve to move on in life and really learn from myself. i don't really feel comfortable discussing it with anyone i'm close to just bc i kinda feel like it's stupid to be distressed about and it feels kinda secret. this job has given me a whole new meaning to being introverted. and i am not an introvert but lately i feel like sharing is just to hard or my thoughts aren't clear enough or it's just not important. just stuff. ugh i wish i could talk to someone bc that's how i solve problems...maybe i'll use the counciling center...even though i kinda hate eric klingensmith...sigh, i don't even want to talk about it here bc i fear the wrong peopel will read it and take things the wrong way. i'm just all fucked up. damn