And then you fold
I've been slaving over Theodore Roethke's "I Knew A Woman" and Anne Sexton's "The Touch," creating an essay that explores the way that the differing form between poems makes love seem ambiguous but outside boys keep screaming and banging on guitars. So I decided to walk outside, into the bitter cold and watch these screaming boys. However screaming boys turned into gangster boys that kept saying the f word and naming various drugs that they are hooked up with. So then I got annoyed, came back upstairs and attempted to work in the 12 floor lounge where I fell asleep. A poor bystander attempted to enter to room only to see a crazy stranger sleeping on the floor and ran away, allowing the door to slam behind them and waking me up. Then I went out into the freezing darkness and walked down Feret which was a stupid idea now that I think about it, but I wanted to go out into the cold by myself and hear something quiet. I've been rather frustrated lately, while in the classroom I feel liberated and excited but I'm still feeling strange when it comes to social situations. Everyone seems to think being dramatic is artistic, that bragging about how drunk they got is impressive. Yet I've been studying World Religions and I was reading about the holy trinity. I understand that the Father gives love to the Son, and the Holy Spirit is the channel of this love. However, as my professor emphasized, if the Son (Since Jesus was a human, the Son includes the rest of us in a sense) does not return this unconditional love that the Father has bestowed upon the humans, then the Spirit is broken. Yeah, yeah, why am I talking about christianity, I must really be catholic now. My point is that I am having difficulty learning how to let go of feeling so far away when everyone around me has a beer or a cigarette in their hand. I know they aren't bad people, I speak with them about Environmental Policies and poetry. If I let go of this, will I lose sense of my set morals? It's so cold outside, I want the sun to rise so I can lay out in Audubon Park and climb my tree so I can read my pretty books from above the ground.
It will all make sense in time, I'm sure of it.
The boys have been screaming since 3:30. My dad called a few minutes ago, telling me that my brother is in Arkansas and that he got a certificate in the mail saying that I made the Dean's List. I found this a bit humorous, considering I had no idea, but it did make me smile. Eventhough my father tries to hide it, I could hear how proud he was despite the miles. :)
I'm falling down, I'm falling down and you're not there to break my fall. I shut my eyes when you're around, I hold my breath to kill the sound.
(Geoff Rickly I adore)
It will all make sense in time, I'm sure of it.
The boys have been screaming since 3:30. My dad called a few minutes ago, telling me that my brother is in Arkansas and that he got a certificate in the mail saying that I made the Dean's List. I found this a bit humorous, considering I had no idea, but it did make me smile. Eventhough my father tries to hide it, I could hear how proud he was despite the miles. :)
I'm falling down, I'm falling down and you're not there to break my fall. I shut my eyes when you're around, I hold my breath to kill the sound.
(Geoff Rickly I adore)