marriage wtf
Wow, it's Wednesday night and I actually got home before 7! Work at my current job continues to grate on my nerves...like I've said several times this past week, I am clearly burnt out.
I'm trying to relax, so I thought I'd jump back into the LJ pool and get reacquainted with posting/journaling for fun without fear that someone I know from work will read it and take it the wrong way. (Yeah, I'm referring to FB.)
Anyway, I'm actually quite cynical when it comes to romance and relationships in my own life because I don't believe my chances are good. I also read advice columns for fun sometimes. It's not that I mock the people who write -- it's just another way for me to see how others live their lives. It's like random people-watching but more voyeuristic on a personal level. At times it gives me food for thought, other times it's like How on earth do people reach certain conclusions and then make major life decisions based on them?
I went to bed on Saturday night feeling particularly bitchy about work and man-dogs who can't keep their pants on and who use/abuse women. I'd read some advice column questions from women who put up with men they are obviously too good for. And what did I dream of that night? Thankfully not work. But of all the things, I dreamed I had a quickie wedding that my mom cheerfully helped put together, despite this nameless/faceless guy not being Chinese and the 'fact' that very few people attended the ceremony.
For some reason, the ceremony was fairly informal and involved a small exercise in which the groom and I were to write what we liked best about each other onto large boards and then hold them up for the attendees to see. This being dream-logic, I realized I knew almost nothing about my husband-to-be but I felt compelled to write that he was cheerful and funny, and to say he made me happy because his good attitude was a good influence on me. As soon as I finished writing and held up my board, I felt a surge of affection for this virtual stranger I'd married. I don't remember what he wrote, just that we gladly completed the ceremony and then he had to go somewhere.
Weird! I've vowed for many years to never marry and I don't even have any crushes at the moment to project into my dreams. I don't remember what this guy looked like except that he was a little taller than me, but I'm sure he didn't resemble anyone I knew. I also tend to find people who are unremittently cheerful annoying. So, I woke up feeling pleasantly perplexed by the dream, considering how hostile I was feeling toward the male half of the human race when I'd gone to bed. I doubt my dreams are prophetic, so I'm probably expressing my secret girly wish for a happily-ever-after soulmate relationship. Ugh, I gave myself the willies just typing that last sentence. Just be glad I didn't dream of work, otherwise I'd subject the internet to yet another work rant I'll feel sheepish about later.