CLARIFICATION
In case there is a little confusion on the subject:
I: Porn star
II: Giant fucking whore
Favorite: Elrohir
Bird: Elladan
Girl: Butch
Boy: Sundance
Fat: Elros
Svelte: Us
Father figure: Maglor
Deadbeat dad: Earendil
Upright young elf: Lindir
Unworthy squirrel fucker: Aragorn
Supposed old job: Herald
Real old job: Child whore
Fucked Boromir: Me
Fucked Saruman: Other Me
Myth: Me needing forklift to get back on couch
Reality: II's ass taking up 75% of the cushions
Psycho elf: Elladan I
Peacock pansy: Elladan II
First Darren from Bewitched: Cool
Second Darren: Lame
Insane mun: Michelle
Really cool mun: Zlot
Has crush on Gandalf: II
Has crush on Ann Larimer: I
Stupid hair: Elrohir
Just stupid: ...Elrohir again
Good touch: Gil-galad
Bad touch: Maglor
Had children with: Celebrian
Did not have children with: Galadriel
Hermaphrodite: Erestor
Just really girlie: Elrohir
I: Porn star
II: Giant fucking whore
Favorite: Elrohir
Bird: Elladan
Girl: Butch
Boy: Sundance
Fat: Elros
Svelte: Us
Father figure: Maglor
Deadbeat dad: Earendil
Upright young elf: Lindir
Unworthy squirrel fucker: Aragorn
Supposed old job: Herald
Real old job: Child whore
Fucked Boromir: Me
Fucked Saruman: Other Me
Myth: Me needing forklift to get back on couch
Reality: II's ass taking up 75% of the cushions
Psycho elf: Elladan I
Peacock pansy: Elladan II
First Darren from Bewitched: Cool
Second Darren: Lame
Insane mun: Michelle
Really cool mun: Zlot
Has crush on Gandalf: II
Has crush on Ann Larimer: I
Stupid hair: Elrohir
Just stupid: ...Elrohir again
Good touch: Gil-galad
Bad touch: Maglor
Had children with: Celebrian
Did not have children with: Galadriel
Hermaphrodite: Erestor
Just really girlie: Elrohir