(no subject)
What's new? I'm sunburnt! And happy about it. I spent a gorgeous 5 hours on the sand at the Lake - read a book, took a nap. My not yet exposed skin burned - though it's normal for me to do so the first time out. I wore a bathing suit top so virgin skin has to do the red thing. My back - well, that's a bit uncomfy for now - but it usually takes a day for the red to calm down. I'm not complaining.
I am complaining however about a certain person who is continually relentless in her ability to piss me off. I've gotten 1 million times better at controlling my reaction to it - but it is just so uncalled for. It's not just against me - her rantings that is. It's about the sibs as well - and their sig. others. The unrealistic expectations have continued forever. It just gets worse and worse since the buffer is no longer able to reason with her. For me, it's always about my weight - now are the constant warnings that I better not screw this up - and the questions and little comments thrown in all the time. I did not lose weight to make anyone happy. I had to do so for health reasons - losing weight did not change me as a human - I'm the same me - and very happy to be me thank you very much. I am healthier - but with a different set of health problems. It was worth it though - and I wouldn't change a thing - nor do I have any desire (or need) to lose any more pounds OR have unnecessary surgery to remove my hanging skin or excess fat. I do not NEED to count calories. I do not NEED to NOT eat this or that nor do I have a NEED TO eat this or that. I certainly don't need reminders that I use to be very fat. It really makes it harder for me to visit and call and do all those things we're supposed to do. I force myself to do it. And when I start to feel as though I'm just going to explode - I try to make a fast exit. It just shouldn't be this way. I have learned that it isn't being done to be mean and cruel - it's just part of her personality - the inablity to censor for one. The inability to be positive as another. Thankfully there's other aspects that make up for this - but THIS is just something that i've yet to be able to deal with. "This" being the criticism and never ending complaints and negativity.
Ok, I feel better having been able to vent. Thank me :)
I am complaining however about a certain person who is continually relentless in her ability to piss me off. I've gotten 1 million times better at controlling my reaction to it - but it is just so uncalled for. It's not just against me - her rantings that is. It's about the sibs as well - and their sig. others. The unrealistic expectations have continued forever. It just gets worse and worse since the buffer is no longer able to reason with her. For me, it's always about my weight - now are the constant warnings that I better not screw this up - and the questions and little comments thrown in all the time. I did not lose weight to make anyone happy. I had to do so for health reasons - losing weight did not change me as a human - I'm the same me - and very happy to be me thank you very much. I am healthier - but with a different set of health problems. It was worth it though - and I wouldn't change a thing - nor do I have any desire (or need) to lose any more pounds OR have unnecessary surgery to remove my hanging skin or excess fat. I do not NEED to count calories. I do not NEED to NOT eat this or that nor do I have a NEED TO eat this or that. I certainly don't need reminders that I use to be very fat. It really makes it harder for me to visit and call and do all those things we're supposed to do. I force myself to do it. And when I start to feel as though I'm just going to explode - I try to make a fast exit. It just shouldn't be this way. I have learned that it isn't being done to be mean and cruel - it's just part of her personality - the inablity to censor for one. The inability to be positive as another. Thankfully there's other aspects that make up for this - but THIS is just something that i've yet to be able to deal with. "This" being the criticism and never ending complaints and negativity.
Ok, I feel better having been able to vent. Thank me :)