(no subject)
jonathan is the uber human.
{ I feel more inconstant than the wind }
teach me how I should forget to think!
{ the moon was as big as your eyes that night, there is a gleam of silver to them like a bright and precious shadow}
the chill on my face and the warmth in my heart is as bound to you as the hot smell of flowers is to artboy, the smell of earth and incense and rain when i press my face into his neck, like a merchant arriving to port from months at sea, he always smells like warm, far-away places.
i miss so many people right now, i feel pulled to anyone i have ever met, wanting to hold them tightly. Ive come to realize that even the people i dont like very much know me better then most, and i appreciate that.
i miss big alex and caitlin and jonathan and caleb and judy, i miss judy's warm kitchen that smelled like hot bricks and wet clay and tea and big cats. I miss funny alex and her cool clothes and spontenaity and easy laughter. I miss caitlin, and talking to caitlin, and her strange comments that are sometimes gross, the sheer lovability of her. i miss long talks with caleb where were always one step ahead of eachother and laughing before a joke is made, because we already know what the other is thinking. and i miss icecream with katie and teasing evan and having him push me roughly.
{missing Jonathan is just a no-brainer, but he is the chili cheese on the big hot dog of missing people}
but i went to judys artshow and it was incredible! she works so hard to make so many beautiful things, her sculptures always remind me of miniature beds with the corners tucked under. and john petersons huge, soaring pots with that are an impossible shade of black like raven wings, and the spots of unpainted glossy wax are like birds. the movement of his work is so enchanting, you cant help but to fly along with it for a little while.
i miss pottery, i miss talking to judy and bailey. they are such good, calm company, giving good advice, it is so calming to just sink your hands into something cold and strange and make it come to life.
i even miss jess and i just saw her not two days ago! pushing her car into the parking lot of mutual federal was an adventure. steering wheels are tricky, you have to pull them alot harder than i thought to get them to go in the direction you want. i really need to build some arm strength. i wish i could steer with my legs. then life would be easy. well, sort of. the steering wheel might complain from my steel, bond girl-like grip. also: CACTUS BLOSSOM FUCKING YES.
annnd something i havent done in awhile:
THINGS I REALLY LOVE BUT DONT WANT PEOPLE TO FIND OUT ABOUT:
ashlee simpson (she makes me wanna lala)
fashion (you got it, the runway shows, the huge-o magazines full of adds, the designers, i know all the names of all the hot models)
oprah (never miss an episode)
those little dogs with the bobbly heads (can also keep me mesmerized for hours)
taco bell (not much of a secret considering my near-daily consumtion, furthering my hypothesis that i will be a monster when my metabolism slows down, curse the day)
yappy, shivery little fluffy dogs that celebrities buy (especially when they put them in cute little clothes and shoes and hats and the more obnoxious the name, the better, like foo foo and muffy and princess tickles)
lifetime movies and books for grannys, like the hot flash club
bad talk shows like montel (aka not-sure-who-the-baby-daddy-is-because-you-cant-keep-it-in-your-pants? PATERNITY TEST T.V)
have a good week babays. and dont think that this world is so bad. new orleans will get better, we can only work towards and for. have faith in our ability to want to do well. people are not basically bad. keep your chin up and your hands open.
~E
{ I feel more inconstant than the wind }
teach me how I should forget to think!
{ the moon was as big as your eyes that night, there is a gleam of silver to them like a bright and precious shadow}
the chill on my face and the warmth in my heart is as bound to you as the hot smell of flowers is to artboy, the smell of earth and incense and rain when i press my face into his neck, like a merchant arriving to port from months at sea, he always smells like warm, far-away places.
i miss so many people right now, i feel pulled to anyone i have ever met, wanting to hold them tightly. Ive come to realize that even the people i dont like very much know me better then most, and i appreciate that.
i miss big alex and caitlin and jonathan and caleb and judy, i miss judy's warm kitchen that smelled like hot bricks and wet clay and tea and big cats. I miss funny alex and her cool clothes and spontenaity and easy laughter. I miss caitlin, and talking to caitlin, and her strange comments that are sometimes gross, the sheer lovability of her. i miss long talks with caleb where were always one step ahead of eachother and laughing before a joke is made, because we already know what the other is thinking. and i miss icecream with katie and teasing evan and having him push me roughly.
{missing Jonathan is just a no-brainer, but he is the chili cheese on the big hot dog of missing people}
but i went to judys artshow and it was incredible! she works so hard to make so many beautiful things, her sculptures always remind me of miniature beds with the corners tucked under. and john petersons huge, soaring pots with that are an impossible shade of black like raven wings, and the spots of unpainted glossy wax are like birds. the movement of his work is so enchanting, you cant help but to fly along with it for a little while.
i miss pottery, i miss talking to judy and bailey. they are such good, calm company, giving good advice, it is so calming to just sink your hands into something cold and strange and make it come to life.
i even miss jess and i just saw her not two days ago! pushing her car into the parking lot of mutual federal was an adventure. steering wheels are tricky, you have to pull them alot harder than i thought to get them to go in the direction you want. i really need to build some arm strength. i wish i could steer with my legs. then life would be easy. well, sort of. the steering wheel might complain from my steel, bond girl-like grip. also: CACTUS BLOSSOM FUCKING YES.
annnd something i havent done in awhile:
THINGS I REALLY LOVE BUT DONT WANT PEOPLE TO FIND OUT ABOUT:
ashlee simpson (she makes me wanna lala)
fashion (you got it, the runway shows, the huge-o magazines full of adds, the designers, i know all the names of all the hot models)
oprah (never miss an episode)
those little dogs with the bobbly heads (can also keep me mesmerized for hours)
taco bell (not much of a secret considering my near-daily consumtion, furthering my hypothesis that i will be a monster when my metabolism slows down, curse the day)
yappy, shivery little fluffy dogs that celebrities buy (especially when they put them in cute little clothes and shoes and hats and the more obnoxious the name, the better, like foo foo and muffy and princess tickles)
lifetime movies and books for grannys, like the hot flash club
bad talk shows like montel (aka not-sure-who-the-baby-daddy-is-because-you-cant-keep-it-in-your-pants? PATERNITY TEST T.V)
have a good week babays. and dont think that this world is so bad. new orleans will get better, we can only work towards and for. have faith in our ability to want to do well. people are not basically bad. keep your chin up and your hands open.
~E