(no subject)
Yesterday was so much win that when Fratboy and I got back to the car after dinner, I saw through the window that there was all this crap strewn about the passenger seat and in a moment of typical cluelessness asked 'is this our car?' cuz hi! I was just sitting there an hour and a half ago so I sure as hell didn't leave a pile of papers and things on the seat unless The Shart has so altered the state of my shphincter that it randomly drops mounds of crap and I don't even notice any more. And that's when Fratboy said 'no babe, the car got broken into' and I nearly vommed right then and there on my pretty new boots because Niter's laptop was in the back seat because after months of being too busy studying and copping Fratboy FINALLY got a chance to fix it and of course the one fucking night I'm bringing it back to her is the night the car gets broken into. For the fifth time. Never buy a Honda Civic. Just sayin'. Anyway I tear into the back seat and wtf because the laptop bag is still there and so I tear into thinking surely they must have grabbed the laptop out of the bag but no thank fuck it is miraculously still there and so it the $70 bottle of champers and wait, the air bags and deck and did they take anything at all?...
Nope. All we can guess is that they got interrupted before they got a chance to do any damage at all so what could have been All The Suck In The Entire World ended up being just the funnay story of remember the time the car got broken into and absolutely nothing bad happened? That is how perfect this birthday has been. From getting treated to new hairz to waking up to all the love in the world from a very squishy and cute Team Testicle to spending the day shopping with my mom and getting the best new boots ever and even trying on bikinis that made me not totally hate myself and then a perfect, romantical dinner with Fratboy and the best night with the best bestestests who were all 'we're throwing you a princess party' and there were tiaras and sashes and hand made cards and I *heart* Toxic Waste tshirts and so much love that now I just die. Of course that could be the hangover to anally rape without lube all other hangovers that came before it and the thought of having to go get groceries now is kind of making me want to whimper but fuck it because for a birthday that good any and all pain is worth it. And I'm so obnoxiously full of squish right now that I need to stop typing but I just want to say out loud right now that yes, I get it Universe and my life is filled with perfection. Thank you. English needs to get it together because those measly words seem so completely incapable of capturing how big this feeling is...
Nope. All we can guess is that they got interrupted before they got a chance to do any damage at all so what could have been All The Suck In The Entire World ended up being just the funnay story of remember the time the car got broken into and absolutely nothing bad happened? That is how perfect this birthday has been. From getting treated to new hairz to waking up to all the love in the world from a very squishy and cute Team Testicle to spending the day shopping with my mom and getting the best new boots ever and even trying on bikinis that made me not totally hate myself and then a perfect, romantical dinner with Fratboy and the best night with the best bestestests who were all 'we're throwing you a princess party' and there were tiaras and sashes and hand made cards and I *heart* Toxic Waste tshirts and so much love that now I just die. Of course that could be the hangover to anally rape without lube all other hangovers that came before it and the thought of having to go get groceries now is kind of making me want to whimper but fuck it because for a birthday that good any and all pain is worth it. And I'm so obnoxiously full of squish right now that I need to stop typing but I just want to say out loud right now that yes, I get it Universe and my life is filled with perfection. Thank you. English needs to get it together because those measly words seem so completely incapable of capturing how big this feeling is...