Wow. I'm exhausted.
CCC is finally over. I cant really say I am glad, but I cant say I am sad, either. We did an amazing job. Thursday went pretty shitty, but let's face it, it was akward that night. Friday, I must say, kicked ass... and Saturday, we did amazing. But now, after it all I am just....... exhausted. My whole body is just so tired. Mentally I am tired, Physically, emotionally... all of it.
Relationship is going through some turbulent times, but it happens, and I know it could get worse. I am trying to work so hard to please everyone, but in turn I am just making myself worse off. I need to just relax, and stop getting so grumpy over things. I get grumpy when I am tired, and I know that is half my problem right now. I love Mike with all my heart, but lately it has been hard to be around him, because I just cant control my mood swings, and it's tearing us up. I'm sorry, Monkey.. I love you and I am really trying.
School is okay, but I hardly ever go this semester. No class challenges me enough to be worth my time. And friends.... well they are kinda flakey... and I hate that. I have so much fun outside of school with them. But when it comes down to it, I feel like I am not important enough to call, like people say they will, but then they forget because I am not important enough to remember. Or maybe I am just too hard on everyone. either way... it's depressing. I need some other friends, or something, because mine never want to hang out. And now that I have gotten a taste of it, I am sad that I cant continue that, for the short time they will all still be here.
Oh well, life has never really gone my way, but hopefully things will brighten up soon enough. Mike should be getting his own place soon, and then a lot of our issues will be able to be worked on, and will lead to us having a better relationship.
I am tired. I need to sleep. Goodnight.
Relationship is going through some turbulent times, but it happens, and I know it could get worse. I am trying to work so hard to please everyone, but in turn I am just making myself worse off. I need to just relax, and stop getting so grumpy over things. I get grumpy when I am tired, and I know that is half my problem right now. I love Mike with all my heart, but lately it has been hard to be around him, because I just cant control my mood swings, and it's tearing us up. I'm sorry, Monkey.. I love you and I am really trying.
School is okay, but I hardly ever go this semester. No class challenges me enough to be worth my time. And friends.... well they are kinda flakey... and I hate that. I have so much fun outside of school with them. But when it comes down to it, I feel like I am not important enough to call, like people say they will, but then they forget because I am not important enough to remember. Or maybe I am just too hard on everyone. either way... it's depressing. I need some other friends, or something, because mine never want to hang out. And now that I have gotten a taste of it, I am sad that I cant continue that, for the short time they will all still be here.
Oh well, life has never really gone my way, but hopefully things will brighten up soon enough. Mike should be getting his own place soon, and then a lot of our issues will be able to be worked on, and will lead to us having a better relationship.
I am tired. I need to sleep. Goodnight.