Got tight last night on absinthe and did knife tricks. Great success shooting the knife underhand into the piano.
-Ernest Hemingway

I think it is hilarious how the ads about "1 GOLDEN RULE TO LOSING 5 POUNDS IN A WEEK," in relation to a tighter tummy, show a pale, white, flabby abdomen, while the tight, lean abdomen is perfectly tanned ( Read more... )

I was just about to post an entry about how much I hate my female organs every 35 days or so, and then I remembered telling Tophat in a wondering sort of fashion that I hadn't done that yet today, and maybe this was the one time I wasn't going to be utterly consistent and predictable.

...

Oops?

p.s. I am in DIRE need of a cuddle.

I think it would be hilarious if some guy made "O Fortuna" the ring-tone for when his mother called him.

Whoops. I changed my mind AGAIN ( Read more... )

Ravish ravish ravish.

Ravish rhymes with radish.

I would not wish to be ravished by a radish.

That would be...oddish.

HA, Sven. HA. HA HA HA ( Read more... )

Tophat sent me this link. It's some guy on Rotten Tomatoes list of the top 10 robots in movies ever. And for the most part, I agree. Not necessarily on the order, and I don't think Bender should be #3, because A)he's not THAT great and B)his name is a joke off of Ender from Ender's Game and I was irked when they made that movie Bender's Game. ( Read more... )

What would happen if there was a movie about some girl who played the players, and had a huge checklist in her room of all the guys she scored and destroyed? Wouldn't that be interesting to see the tables turned in that manner? Instead of seeing all those sexy cheerleading asses in slo-mo, we'd see all the football players' abs in slo-mo. (URGH. ( Read more... )

In case anybody cares, I am not as obsessed with roosters as the Major likes to imply.