Minion Manager! With vampires...
So E. is all hyped up about some book series she's reading. Twilight something-or-nother. Yeah, that's nice, whatever, you said vampire. I continue on with my life, not caring any more. Then Head Trip referenced it, and I went looking. (I now know who the Edward Cullen is I keep randomly seeing in icons.) And this is goldSeriously, I wrote
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Item 2: Yeah I KNOW they aren't like, some paragon of literary virtue. But lots of people read and enjoyed Eragon, (including me when I wasn't LOL mocking it as a ripoff), a YA fantasy that did rather successful, and no one can claim THAT was written well. Although at least he was like, in high school when he wrote it... and this author had been an English lit major (hence the mild fixation on Wuthering Heights)
Item 3: It, sadly, is better written than other YA vampire romances that I have come across. Not better written as in great. But better enough. Although yes. Melodrama galore and not enough gore.
Item 4: THE ANGST! SO MUCH ANGST! I LUVS IT!!!
Item 5: Harry Potter is YA for 12 year olds. And Harper Hall trilogy. And Coraline. And Narnia. And plenty of other books. Saying you shouldn't read something because it was written for young audiences means diddly.
Item 6: I didn't write better crap ever. A'course, you always slammed my writing as cliche anyway, which sometimes made me kind of never want to write again because my stuff sucked and you laughed at it.
Item 7: I know where you sleep. I will read the books to you in your sleep. You will dream of sparkly daystars. *giggle*
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Item 2: It's made all the sadder she's an English lit major. And I didn't say YA is bad- just questioning why the worst of it is worshipped. What's so wrong with making them read Nancy Drew instead?
Item 3: I blame Buffy for the vampire love. So really, it's Joss Whedon's fault that tween girls are obsessed with creepy men with no character.
Item 4: It's some guilty pleasure of yours, isn't it? I blame the drugs.
Item 5: Harper Hall got adopted by YA, it wasn't written as YA. All the best YA books are like that. Just look at The Hobbit.
Item 6: I was born a critic and had to inflict it on everyone as much as possible. The twins were worse. You just wrote horrible poetry and self-absorbed short stories. They were budding little "I write Mary Sues!"
Item 7: Never coming home again, ever.
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