fic: together we'll fly // katniss + johanna/haymitch // chicago mockingjays (thg/hockey)

[electrumqueen]

(my life is off the rails but it's getting better! yay!)

LOL MOAR CHICAGO MOCKINGJAYS. title is from the vancouver olympics theme song, which is objectively terrible, but w/e.

together we'll fly
katniss, johanna. (haymitch/johanna, peeta/katniss, finnick/annie, gale)
pg, no warnings.

Katniss hates the Olympics. Hates them. They’re boring and

Comments

[deathmallow]

JFC, this whole thing. Chicago FTW, hockey, Hayhanna, Haymitch as the one asshole Canadian that exists, the rivalries and the shout-outs to canon...love it. :D

[electrumqueen]

hahahah thanks!!!! i don't understand how this 'verse happened but i'm like, obsessed with it.

[deathmallow]

It's crazy but awesome. And yes, Haymitch just wandering around and being all "Meh, don't give a shit about rules" and him and Johanna pretending they don't care. ;)

[electrumqueen]

man i just really enjoy getting to write everybody relatively free of trauma? like katniss/peeta is FUN not traumatic and that's SO soothing/refreshing. haymitch is just the best troll to ever troll. ~~~super fly! (except for that time that canuck elbowed katniss in the face and then he got in his first fight in like ... three years.)

[deathmallow]

Yeah, that can definitely be interesting, and Johanna's reasons for being on (ughhh) Pittsburgh are intriguing, though I hope she'll come to Chi-town and be one of the gang!

And of course Haymitch would get into a fight over that, and kick ass. ;)

I'm still laughing over Katniss' horror at Haymitch having sex hair.

[electrumqueen]

haha oh man, i just could not give up finnick-> sid crosby, could not do it. (narrative parallels, i love them.) like both johanna and finnick are individually v strong/impressive but it's easier for them to have someone to deflect the pressure? (lol, geno malkin pretending he doesn't speak english; if i could have swung johanna as eastern european, she'd do it ALL THE TIME) also i brotp them, their friendship makes me SO happy. if jo showed up in chi-town, let's be real, she'd get in a fistfight with cato within two minutes and it would be amazing and terrible. (also no way could they afford her. bb girl is making baaaank.)

reluctantly/horrifiedly paternal haymitch is my fave haymitch :)
HE'S HER HOCKEY DAD, SHE DOESN'T WANT TO THINK ABOUT THAT SHIT. #foreverscarred

[deathmallow]

FInnick as Sid works so well, and I enjoy F/J as a mad brOTP (not so much a romance) so this makes me laugh.

Johanna starting fights with Cato though...bwahahaha. The thought amuses me. :D

Moar Haymitch FTW. Hayhanna OTP Sex Hair Haymitch Conspiring With Johanna For Messing With Katniss Because He Cares is my favorite Haymitch. XD

[electrumqueen]

l o l i love it both ways! i think in this verse though they're strictly platonic and i ADORE it (except for that one time in florida but nobody talks about it because that was a terrible roadtrip and they've all blocked it from their memories). she totally fights people for him and he totally does really uncharacteristically revealing interviews about how angry he is when people talk shit about her.

she'd literally just do it for shits and giggles. she and foxface would just sit quietly and like, commune planning death for EVERYONE and it'd be AWESOME. (goalie foxface is my secret fave.)

after the johanna/olympics hilarity, haymitch makes it a trend to walk out of random people's hotel rooms and into katniss in the hallway. the first three times she buys it but after it's GALE HAWTHORNE she's like, YOU ARE THE WORST HUMAN ... and also you TOTALLY LOVE JOHANNA HA I WIN ALL THE AWARDS

[deathmallow]

Goalie Foxface is genius. Nobody ever expects her. ;)

LOL. Katniss is initially too shocked to notice he lacks the sex hair on these latter "let's blitz Katniss" efforts but then yeah she's all "YOU LOVE JOHANNA NEENER NEENER NEENER YOUR DENIAL IS INEFFECTIVE".

"Sticks and stones, sweetheart. What about your little (airquotes) 'fake' PR relationship with Mellark? That tonsil hockey after the Bluejackets game didn't look fake to me."

[electrumqueen]

she's just tiny and snarky and hideously deadly and everyone's like, "haha you picked a miniature girl to be in goal, O CHICAGO" and then like ... two straight shutouts later they're like "... fine."

oh, he has sexhair. it's convincing, but also fake. haymitch dedicates himself to the prank. HE IS A PROFESSIONAL.

katniss doesn't even care that his vengeance will be swift and constant, because she wins FOREVER. (at this point, idek if katniss and peeta end up being endgame? they might just be BESTIES who have a couple confused hookups under their belt.)

peeta's like, "uh, katniss,did you make me this valentine? because i appreciate the thought, but i didn't think you needed to paper my stall in them..."

[deathmallow]

Foxface is my hero. The end.

LOL. He does look after the small details to make a ruse convincing, this is true. Meanwhile Gale is just laughing his ass off after the two of them were sitting in there playing poker.

Haymitch doesn't give a shit because he's the one with a good relationship and having great sex, ergo he wins FOREVER. ;) Although he and Johanna are going to be sadface if they're forever in different cities, leading Katniss to make snarky jokes about blue balls and/or getting traded?

Personally I think the two of them as just BFFs could really be hilarious and awesome rather than "Everlark must be endgame IT IS DESTINED."

[electrumqueen]

gale lost though so it's a mix of "LOL PRANKING KATNISS" and "SERIOUSLY CAN YOU NEVER LET SOMEONE ELSE WIN???" (of course not, they play hockey, winning is a way of life. well, not so much for gale, he plays for fucking edmonton

[deathmallow]

Edmonton? Ouch.

Haymitch will never retire, let's be honest. Much as he bitches, HOCKEY 4 LYFE. I'm not sure whether he'd be OK getting traded to Pittsburgh. XD

Meanwhile, during any Pittsburgh/Chicago game Katniss is all STOP FLIRTING ON THE ICE NO STOP THE SNARKY REMARKS AT THE FACEOFF YOU TWO CHECKING SHOULD NOT BE FOREPLAY WTF DDDDDDDDD:

(cue jokes about whether those two even managed to get the pads off before having sex)

I like this scenario. I really thing THG would have been more powerful anyway if it focused on Katniss and Prim because that love was the one that mattered, rather than suddenly being all EVERLARRRRRRRRRK OR DIE.

[electrumqueen]

SUCKS 2 B U, GALE HAWTHORNE. idk i kinda ship sam gagner/pkane so maybe katniss/gale will be endgame? IDK. i think out of everyone who doesn't play for chicago tho gale's probs the most likely to get traded to the mockingjays. (LOL EDMONTON CAN HAVE CATO... except rly if cato's getting traded to anywhere it's philly, oops i have a lot of feelings about this 'verse)

l o l if he got traded to pittsburgh finnick would confiscate all his alcohol. it would be a horrendous disaster and also he and johanna would spend ALL THEIR TIME having sex and scarring all the teammates. NOBODY IS HERE FOR THAT.

(ahahaha johanna shuts 'em all down with, "nope. we don't. i wouldn't touch that wall if i were you. or sit there. or ... no, you can stand on that patch of carpet, but don't move to the left or to the right at all." #trolllife)

i wanted it to secretly be about prim :(((( SECRET BADASS WIN ALL THE THINGS WITH DOCTORING!!!!

[deathmallow]

Haymitch laughs at Cato LOL PHILLLLLLLY.

They'd spend all their off-ice time having sex. They do take their hockey seriously. ;) And that scenario would be hilarious if only for a few weeks, let's face it.

("IS THERE ANYWHERE YOU TWO HAVEN"T BEEN FUCKING EACH OTHER" "...we should make a list." "And get on that list.")

Hayhanna...gloriously messing with everyone forever. It's a beautiful thing.

Prim yes plz more.

[electrumqueen]

haymitch makes cato a care package before he leaves. it consists of whiskey, whiskey, more whiskey, and a hard-boiled egg.

hahaha yes!!! finnick would be like, "please come out of your house we need to have practice" and they'd both put their clothes on and go, but if it was like, 'COME MEET THE TEAM/DO THIS INTERVIEW' oops, haymitch broke the phone, what a disaster.
the pens would just be like, "YOU NEED TO GIVE HIM BACK" within two weeks.
(and lbr, chicago would be sobbing to death about it so they would take him back like they took back versteeg: OPEN ARMS)

man i really want prim in hockeyverse! PROBABLY SHE GROWS UP TO SPECIALIZE IN CONCUSSIONS :((((((